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- How to Earn People's Trust — and Keep It
如何赢得并保持人们的信任
How to Earn People's Trust — and Keep It
如何赢得并保持人们的信任
Every action matters. 每一个行动都至关重要。
Welcome to One Thing Better. Each week, the editor in chief of Entrepreneur magazine (that's me) shares one way to be more successful and satisfied — and build a career or company you love.
欢迎来到《更好的事情》。每周,《企业家》杂志的主编(就是我)会分享一种让你更成功、更满意的方法,帮助你建立一个你热爱的职业或公司。
If this email is useful to you, please share it with others!
如果这封邮件对你有帮助,请分享给其他人!
Today’s one thing: Being trusted.
今天的主题:获得信任。
That one thing, better: Always earning trust.
那件事,更好:始终获得信任。
Do people trust you? 人们会信任你吗?
Could they trust you more?
他们能对你更信任吗?
We often have binary answers to this — it’s either yes or no.
我们对这个问题的回答往往是非黑即白——要么是,是,要么不是。
But trust doesn’t actually work like that. Trust is a gradient — and once you appreciate how it works, you can build (and maintain!) trust in smarter, more careful ways.
但信任并不是这样运作的。信任是一个渐进的过程——一旦你理解了它的运作方式,你就可以以更聪明、更谨慎的方式来建立和维持信任。
It’s a concept called the trust battery.
这是一种被称为信任电池的概念。
Today, I’ll show you how to use it — and how it can help you build better relationships, professionally and personally.
今天,我将向你展示如何使用它,以及它如何帮助你在职业和个人生活中建立更好的关系。
What is the trust battery?
信任电池是什么?
The idea is often credited to Tobi Lütke, the CEO of Shopify. He explained it like this in a New York Times story:
这个想法通常被认为是 Shopify 首席执行官 Tobi Lütke 提出的。他在《纽约时报》的一篇报道中这样解释。
Another concept we talk a lot about is something called a “trust battery.” It’s charged at 50 percent when people are first hired. And then every time you work with someone at the company, the trust battery between the two of you is either charged or discharged, based on things like whether you deliver on what you promise.
我们常常讨论的另一个概念是“信任电池”。当新员工入职时,这个电池的充电量为 50%。之后,每次你与公司里的某人合作时,你们之间的信任电池会根据你是否履行承诺等因素而充电或放电。
To be clear: Nobody has one trust battery. Everyone has a different battery with everyone they know. “It’s a mental model for how to think about the relationship between people,” Lütke said later on a podcast. Jane’s battery with Amanda might be 30%, but her battery with Suzanne might be 98%.
为了明确:没有人只有一个信任电池。每个人与他们认识的每个人都有不同的信任电池。“这是一种思维模型,用于理解人与人之间的关系,”Lütke 在一次播客中提到。简与阿曼达的信任电池可能是 30%,而她与苏珊的信任电池可能高达 98%。
Act wisely, and the battery rises. Act poorly, and it falls. Sure, you’ll never know exactly how charged a battery is — but once you focus on it, you’ll see plenty of clues.
明智地行动,电池就会充电;行动不当,电池就会放电。虽然你无法确切知道电池的充电程度,但一旦你关注它,就会发现许多线索。
I love this idea — so let’s take it a step further:
我很喜欢这个主意——让我们再深入一步:
Our batteries require constant attention
我们的电池需要不断维护
As I wrote above, most people think of trust as binary: Someone either trusts us, or they don’t. But that would mean trust is unmovable. If we’re trusted, we can take it for granted or even abuse it a little. If we’re not trusted, then our situation is hopeless.
正如我之前所说,大多数人认为信任是二元的:有人要么信任我们,要么不信任。但这并不意味着信任是不可改变的。如果我们被信任,我们可能会理所当然地接受,甚至稍微滥用一下。如果我们不被信任,那我们的处境就会变得绝望。
The trust battery forces us to think differently. Now we must factor trust into all our actions — because every action can impact the battery.
信任电池让我们必须以不同的方式思考。现在,我们需要将信任融入到所有行动中——因为每一个行动都可能影响信任电池的状态。
This creates healthy caution: If my battery with someone is at 80%, do I want to take a risk that could bring it down to 70%?
这让我保持健康的谨慎:如果我和某人的关系在 80%,我是否愿意冒险让它降到 70%?
It also creates healthy patience: If my battery with someone is at 30%, I can incrementally grow it — up to 35%, 40%, and more. That way, I’m making progress while being mindful that they don’t fully trust me yet.
它还培养了健康的耐心:如果我和某人的关系电量是 30%,我可以逐步提升到 35%、40%甚至更高。这样,我在取得进展的同时,也意识到他们还没有完全信任我。
Even more importantly, it creates healthy perspective: The trust battery forces you to consider what really charges or drains the battery — and whether you’re unnecessarily holding yourself back.
更重要的是,它提供了健康的视角:信任电池让你思考什么真正能充电或耗电,以及你是否在无意中限制了自己。
That last part is tricky. And to be frank, I’m still learning it. Here’s why.
最后那部分很难。坦白说,我还在学习。这就是原因。
When to spend the battery
何时消耗电池
Let’s hit pause on the battery metaphor for a moment, and just get personal.
让我们暂时放下电池的比喻,聊聊个人的事情。
A few months ago, I was talking with my friend (and podcast cohost) Nicole Lapin about my personal-brand business. She thinks I can be more aggressive with it, and asked: Why don’t I market myself more? Why don’t I raise my prices?
几个月前,我和我的朋友(也是播客的共同主持人)妮可·拉平谈论我的个人品牌业务。她认为我可以更加积极,并问我:为什么不更多地推广自己?为什么不提高我的价格呢?
I told her my fear: If I’m too salesy, people will trust me less.
我告诉她我的担忧:如果我表现得太过于推销,人们可能会对我信任减少。
For example: I turn down most advertising requests for this newsletter, which is why there are few ads here. I also rarely promote my offerings, like keynotes speaking or 1:1 coaching. Why? Because I don’t want readers (like you!) to feel like I’m just after their dollars. I’ve also kept my coaching prices low, because I don’t want others to think I’m too uppity or exclusive. And when I work with partners, I almost never propose upsells.
例如:我通常拒绝大多数关于这个新闻通讯的广告请求,这就是为什么这里的广告很少。我也很少推广我的服务,比如主题演讲或一对一辅导。为什么呢?因为我不想让读者(像你一样!)觉得我只是想要他们的钱。我把辅导价格定得很低,因为我不想让别人觉得我太高傲或排外。而在与合作伙伴合作时,我几乎从不提议追加销售。
“You want to keep your trust battery at 100% and I love that,” Nicole told me. “But I think you’re overestimating what things drain your battery.”
“你想把你的信任电池保持在 100%,我很喜欢这一点,”妮可对我说。“但我觉得你高估了哪些事情会消耗你的电池。”
This got me thinking. Nicole is right — I value people’s trust, and I’ve always been willing to make sacrifices to earn and keep it. I frequently give away my time and expertise, I ask for few favors, I’m rarely confrontational, and I never want people to feel like I have an agenda.
这让我开始思考。妮可说得对——我非常重视他人的信任,并且一直愿意为此做出牺牲。我常常把自己的时间和专业知识无私奉献,很少请求他人的帮助,几乎不与人发生冲突,也从不想让别人觉得我有 ulterior motives。
I’m comfortable with these choices. But as Nicole said, they’re premised on beliefs that may not be true.
我对这些选择感到满意。不过,正如妮可所说,这些选择是基于一些可能并不真实的信念。
For example: I rarely ask people for favors because I don’t want to drain my battery — but what if, for people I have trusting relationships with, asking for favors actually charges the battery? After all, I’m showing that I trust them enough to ask for their help. And when they can help, it makes them happy.
例如:我很少向别人请求帮助,因为我不想耗尽自己的精力——但如果是对我有信任关系的人,请求帮助其实能让我充电呢?毕竟,我是在表达我对他们的信任,愿意向他们寻求帮助。而当他们能够提供帮助时,这也会让他们感到快乐。
And what if sales pitches aren’t as trust-draining as I fear? It’s possible that, if I pitch services in my newsletter, most readers aren’t bothered — or maybe their trust dips just a few percentages. But when someone buys, and I deliver a lot of value for their dollar, they could trust me even more than before!
那么,如果销售推销并没有我想象中那么消耗信任呢?如果我在我的通讯中推销服务,大多数读者可能并不会在意——或者他们的信任可能只下降了几个百分点。但是当有人购买时,我为他们提供了很多价值,他们可能会比以前更加信任我!
So, how are you charging your battery?
那么,你是怎么给电池充电的?
As I’ve written this, I’ve been thinking about how I charge my trust battery.
在我写这篇文章时,我一直在思考如何为我的信任电池充电。
Nicole was right: I really, truly want to keep my batteries as close to 100% as possible — which isn’t always easy, and isn’t always possible, but I try.
妮可说得对:我确实希望我的电池尽量保持在 100%左右——这并不总是容易,也并不总是可能,但我会尽力而为。
So I asked myself: What works? What do I aspire to do best?
所以我问自己:什么是有效的?我最希望做到的是什么?
Here are 18 ways I recommend building trust:
我推荐的 18 种建立信任的方法:
Give with no expectation of a return
不求回报地给予Ask deep questions and honor people’s answers
深入提问,尊重他人的回答Assume good intentions 假定对方是出于好意
Be curious and genuinely interested
保持好奇心,真心对事物感兴趣Be responsive 保持灵活应对
Be reliable 要可靠
Be communicative 进行有效沟通
Be patient 请耐心些
Be additive 具有附加性的
Be predictable 让人能够预见你的行为
Recognize other people’s priorities, and prioritize them
识别他人的优先级,并将其放在首位Recognize other people’s concerns, and never inhabit them
理解他人的担忧,但不要让它们影响自己Recognize where people are coming from, and meet them there
了解人们的背景,与他们建立联系Never be reckless 别轻举妄动
When there’s an opportunity to be kind, even in small ways, be kind
当有机会施以善意时,即使是微小的举动,也要心存善良When there’s an opportunity to be cruel, even if it’s tempting, always pass
当有机会施加残忍时,即使很诱人,也要始终选择放弃If someone needs time or space, give it to them
如果有人需要时间或空间,就给他们一些Trust them too 也要信任他们
Every day, you have multiple chances to charge the trust battery.
每天,你都有很多机会来增强信任。
All it requires is your energy.
这只需要你的精力。
That’s how to do one thing better.
这就是提升一项技能的方法。
P.S. Want my help 1:1? In the spirit of following Nicole’s advice above, I’ll share this: I’m bookable for 15- or 30-minute consulting sessions, or monthly programs where I can help you develop a personal brand, improve your writing, grow your LinkedIn following, and more. Connect here.
P.S. 想要一对一的帮助吗?根据尼科尔的建议,我想分享一下:我提供 15 分钟或 30 分钟的咨询会议,或每月的项目,帮助你发展个人品牌、提升写作能力、增加 LinkedIn 关注者等。欢迎在这里联系我。
P.P.S. Not getting paid what you’re worth? Here’s a podcast episode where Nicole talks me into increasing my rates. She convinced me — and she can convince you!
P.P.S. 你觉得自己的价值没有得到应有的回报吗?这是一期播客节目,妮可让我决定提高收费。她成功说服了我——她也能说服你!
P.P.S. Miss my last newsletter? It was about how to ask for what you really want. Read!
P.P.S. 想念我上期的通讯吗?那期内容是关于如何表达你真正想要的东西。快来阅读吧!
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还没订阅我们的新闻通讯?现在就免费订阅,掌握你的未来。
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💌 你觉得怎么样?请告诉我!
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📕 购买我的书,为你的职业生涯做好未来准备!
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🎧 最新播客:“奥运会带来的意想不到的职业启示”
Keep reading 继续阅读吧
How to Motivate Yourself When You're Feeling Blah
如何在感到无趣时激励自己
These are the three things you really need
这三件事是你真正需要的
How to Tell Everyone How Awesome You Are (Part 2)
如何向大家展示你的出色之处(第二部分)
Does self-promotion make you uncomfortable? Try this.
自我推销让你感到不自在吗?可以试试这个方法。
How to Find Something New That Makes You Happy
如何发现让你快乐的新事物
You've earned it — and I'll prove it.
你值得拥有这一切——我会向你证明。