Chapter Text 章节正文
“Is ahjussi not coming over today?”
“大叔今天不过来吗？”
Yoo Joonghyuk briefly glanced at his phone for the seventh time this past hour. “Something must’ve come up.”
刘众赫在过去的一个小时里第七次瞥了一眼手机。“可能有什么事耽搁了。”
“Oh,” Yoo Mia said, staring at a basket of gingerbread cookies with a crestfallen expression, “I wanted him to try what we baked today.”
“哦，”刘美雅看着一篮子姜饼，表情有些失落，“我想让他尝尝我们今天烤的饼干。”
He patted her head. “I can give him some tomorrow, and I’ll let you know if he likes it.”
他拍了拍她的头。“我明天可以给他一些，如果他喜欢的话我会告诉你的。”
Her eyes sparkled as she grinned. “Good idea, oppa!”
她的眼睛闪闪发亮，咧嘴一笑。“好主意，欧巴！”
He retrieved a glass container from the cabinet and neatly stacked the gingerbread cookies inside. She watched him meticulously line up the treats, wondering if he realized they would just become disorganized once he picked up the box.
他从橱柜里拿出一个玻璃容器，整齐地把姜饼饼干堆放在里面。她看着他一丝不苟地排列着这些点心，心里想着他是否意识到一旦拿起盒子，它们就会变得乱七八糟。
“Oppa.” “欧巴。”
He stuffed chocolates into the edges of the container as a placeholder to keep the gingerbread cookies from jostling around. “What is it?”
他把巧克力塞进容器的边缘作为填充物，以防止姜饼饼干晃动。‘这是什么？’
“You seem to like ahjussi a lot.”
‘你好像很喜欢大叔。’
One of the truffles slipped through his fingers, and it landed on the gingerbread cookie with a tiny crack. Yoo Joonghyuk looked at the dismembered leg of the cookie before facing her curious stare.
一颗松露巧克力从他指间滑落，轻轻砸在姜饼饼干上，发出微小的碎裂声。刘众赫看了看饼干上断裂的腿，然后面对她好奇的目光。
“What makes you say that all of a sudden?” He replaced the broken cookie with one of its intact comrades before sealing the container with its designated lid.
“你怎么突然这么说？”他把那块碎掉的饼干换成了完好的一块，然后用盖子封好了容器。
Yoo Mia tilted her head and shrugged. “Just because.”
刘美雅歪了歪头，耸了耸肩。“没什么原因。”
Yoo Joonghyuk slid the container aside on the counter. “But no, I don’t. He’s…” He began clearing away the other plates. “…bothersome.”
刘众赫把容器推到柜台一边。“不，我不喜欢。他……”他开始收拾其他盘子。“……很烦人。”
She watched how her brother twisted his lips in a frown, the crease between his brows deepening. She refrained from giggling by clearing her throat. “Oppa.”
“她看着哥哥皱起眉头，嘴唇扭曲，眉间的皱纹加深了。她清了清嗓子，忍住不笑出声来。‘欧巴。’”
“What.” “什么。”
“You look more happy these days.” She folded her arms behind her back and stood on her tiptoes. “And that makes me happy too.”
“‘你最近看起来更开心了。’她将双手背在身后，踮起脚尖。‘这也让我很开心。’”
Yoo Joonghyuk paused, peering down at her bright smile. With a small smile of his own, he knelt down and spread his arms outward. She hopped forward and threw her arms around his neck in a tight embrace. He ruffled her hair and remarked, “Do you remember two weeks after we moved in, you were crying because none of the bakeries here had your favorite bread from back home?”
“刘众赫停顿了一下，低头看着她灿烂的笑容。他微微一笑，跪下来张开双臂。她跳上前去，紧紧搂住他的脖子。他揉了揉她的头发，说道：‘你还记得我们搬进来两周后，你因为这里的面包店没有你家乡最喜欢的面包而哭了吗？’”
She tore herself away from the hug, her face flushed a light shade of pink. “I wasn’t crying! I was just… a little bit sad.”
“她从拥抱中挣脱出来，脸上泛着淡淡的粉红色。‘我没哭！我只是……有点难过。’”
“You cried for two hours.”
“‘你哭了两个小时。’”
“Oppa!” she cried indignantly, smacking his shoulder. “No, I didn’t!”
“‘欧巴！’她气愤地喊道，拍了一下他的肩膀。‘不，我没有！’”
A low rumble sounded through the air. “And do you remember how we discovered another pastry that’s now your favorite? And how you also love to explore our neighborhood?” He brushed away her baby hairs, something that always set Yoo Mia at ease. “Just like how you’ve been adjusting since we moved, I’ve also been doing the same.” He rested his hand on the crown of her head. “That’s all.”
低沉的隆隆声在空中回荡。“你还记得我们是怎么发现你现在最喜欢的另一种点心的吗？还有你有多喜欢探索我们的社区？”他轻轻拂去她的婴儿毛发，这总是能让刘美亚感到安心。“就像你自从我们搬家后一直在适应一样，我也一直在做同样的事情。”他把手放在她的头顶上。“就是这样。”
“So by that analogy—” These days, Yoo Joonghyuk noticed her vocabulary was expanding rather quickly, likely a result of hanging out too much with a certain someone. “—that means ahjussi is—”
“所以按照这个类比——”最近，刘众赫注意到她的词汇量扩展得相当快，这很可能是和某个特定的人混得太多的结果。“——那意味着大叔是——”
Yoo Joonghyuk frowned. “Why do you keep bringing him up?”
刘众赫皱起眉头。“你为什么总是提起他？”
She crinkled her nose cutely. “Because you always react when I mention ahjussi.”
她可爱地皱了皱鼻子。“因为每次我提到大叔时，你都会有反应。”
“I do not.” “我没有。”
She patted his head. “Lying is bad, oppa.”
“她拍了拍他的头。“撒谎是不对的，欧巴。””
In lieu of a retort, he stood up, mumbling how it was time for her to go to bed.
“他没有反驳，而是站起来，嘟囔着说她该去睡觉了。”
Yoo Mia hopped over to the fridge to drink some water before going to bed. When she pried open the door, her eyes landed on the three lunch boxes to the right side of the second shelf, their designated spot. She also noticed that these days, they never had tomatoes in stock but there was never a shortage of eggs.
“刘米娅蹦蹦跳跳地走到冰箱前，准备喝点水再睡觉。当她打开冰箱门时，目光落在了第二层右侧的三个午餐盒上，那是它们固定的位置。她还注意到，最近冰箱里从来没有番茄，但鸡蛋却从不短缺。”
On her way to her bedroom, she stopped by her brother’s room. “Oppa, what are you up to?”
在去卧室的路上，她在哥哥的房间前停了下来。‘欧巴，你在干什么？’
Yoo Joonghyuk was leaning against the bedframe with a book in his palm. The lamp adjacent to him filled the room with a soft golden glow. “Just reading.”
刘众赫靠在床架上，手里拿着一本书。旁边的台灯给房间洒下柔和的金色光芒。‘只是在看书。’
When they first moved in, she would always find him gaming late into the night, the blue-white glare accentuating the sunken lines of his face. But these days, he would be reading and sleeping earlier than he usually did in the past. “What are you reading?”
他们刚搬进来时，她总是发现他深夜还在打游戏，蓝白色的光芒映照出他脸上凹陷的线条。但最近，他比以前更早地看书和睡觉。‘你在看什么？’
“Some book that—” he paused, glancing at her before saying, “—someone recommended.”
“某本书——”他停顿了一下，瞥了她一眼，然后说，“——有人推荐的。”
“I see,” she hummed, with a drawn-out nod. “Is it interesting?”
“我明白了，”她拖长声音点了点头，“有趣吗？”
“I’ll let you know once I finish it.” He nodded at the clock. “You should go to sleep.”
“等我读完再告诉你。”他朝时钟点了点头，“你该去睡觉了。”
She gave him a quick hug. “Good night, oppa.”
她快速地拥抱了他一下。“晚安，oppa。”
He squeezed back. “Good night, Mia.”
“他回握了一下。“晚安，米娅。””
As she exited his room, she glanced over her shoulder once more, her eyes landing on the familiar blue octopus plush on his nightstand. She entered her room, shutting off the lights and climbing into her bed. Under the fluffy comforter, she closed her eyes, thinking of how her stubborn brother will never admit that a certain ahjussi had already wormed his way into their life.
“当她离开他的房间时，她又回头看了一眼，目光落在他床头柜上那只熟悉的蓝色章鱼毛绒玩具上。她走进自己的房间，关掉灯，爬上床。在蓬松的被子下，她闭上眼睛，想着她那固执的哥哥永远不会承认某个大叔已经悄悄融入了他们的生活。”
She snuggled into her pillow and smiled. But as long as he’s happy, then it’s fine.
“她依偎在枕头上，微笑着。但只要他开心，那就没关系。”
Over in the room across from hers, the person in question was not happy at the moment.
在她对面的房间里，那个人此刻并不开心。
He picked up his phone, glaring at the text he sent half an hour ago.
他拿起手机，瞪着半小时前发出的那条短信。
Mia made something for you <<
Mia 为你做了些东西<<
I’ll bring it tomorrow <<
我明天带过来 <<
The only times Kim Dokja took forever to reply were usually when he was busy at work, but Yoo Joonghyuk was almost positive he didn’t have a shift this evening. Or maybe a co-worker needed to change shifts at the last minute?
金独子唯一会花很长时间回复的时候通常是他工作忙的时候，但刘众赫几乎可以肯定他今晚没有班。或者也许是同事在最后一刻需要换班？
He slammed the book he was holding closed, placing it on the table next to the plush.
他猛地合上手中的书，把它放在桌上的毛绒玩具旁边。
No use dwelling on this any further, he reasoned. It wasn’t like he needed a response right away.
再纠结下去也没用，他心想。反正他也不需要马上得到回复。
He flipped the switch of the lamp, allowing the darkness to envelope his room. He buried himself under the blankets and closed his eyes.
他按下了灯的开关，让黑暗笼罩了他的房间。他把自己埋在被子里，闭上了眼睛。
After all, he could just talk to him tomorrow at school.
毕竟，他明天在学校就可以和他说话了。
However, the next morning, Kim Dokja wasn’t there to greet him as usual.
然而，第二天早上，金独子并没有像往常一样来迎接他。
Even after the bell rung, he was still nowhere to be seen. Yoo Joonghyuk whipped out his phone but paused. It wasn’t like Kim Dokja had never been late to class before; sure, it didn’t happen that often but today could be one of those days. And he’d be damned if Kim Dokja suddenly appeared right after he texted him and then later teased him for ‘missing his presence’. He tossed his phone in his desk and flipped open a textbook, grumbling under his breath.
即使铃声响起，他依然不见踪影。刘众赫掏出手机，但犹豫了一下。金独子以前也不是没有迟到过；当然，这种情况并不常见，但今天可能是其中之一。如果金独子在他发短信后突然出现，然后嘲笑他‘想念他的存在’，那他可就倒霉了。他把手机扔进课桌，翻开课本，低声抱怨着。
But when the minute hand advanced fifteen minutes and the desk beside him remained empty, Yoo Joonghyuk furtively snuck his phone out.
但当分针前进了十五分钟，他旁边的座位依然空着时，刘众赫偷偷拿出了手机。
Where are you << 你在哪里<<
He texted him again ten minutes later when he didn’t receive a reply.
十分钟后，他没有收到回复，于是又给他发了条消息。
Hey << 嘿 <<
Kim Dokja << 金独子 <<
“Okay, class, we’ll be focusing on pages 237-245 today. Please pair up and work through the problem sets together.”
“好的，同学们，今天我们将重点学习第 237 至 245 页的内容。请两人一组，一起完成习题集。”
Chairs scraped across the tile floors accompanied by quiet chatter that was steadily growing in volume as students began working on the assignment. Yoo Joonghyuk glanced down at his phone, noting that his lock screen was void of notifications. He stared down at the blank sheet of notebook in front of him. After a minute or two, he quietly lifted up his pen and began solving the first problem alone.
椅子在瓷砖地板上刮擦的声音伴随着学生们开始做作业时逐渐增大的低声交谈。刘众赫低头看了看手机，注意到锁屏上没有通知。他盯着面前空白的笔记本纸。一两分钟后，他轻轻拿起笔，独自开始解决第一个问题。
Why aren’t you answering <<
你为什么不回消息<<
Yoo Joonghyuk tried calling him during lunch. He went to the library, as usual, and took out the spare key Kim Dokja once gave him to unlock the door to their hideout.
刘众赫在午餐时试着给他打电话。他像往常一样去了图书馆，拿出金独子曾经给他的备用钥匙，打开了他们秘密基地的门。
“The number you have dialed—"
“您拨打的号码——”
He let his phone drop onto the carpeted floor as he rested his arms on the wooden coffee table beside a couple lunch boxes. His portion was barely half-eaten before he closed the lid, stacking it on top of an unopened lunch box, which was beside the box of gingerbread cookies.
他让手机掉在地毯上，双臂搁在木制咖啡桌上，旁边放着几个午餐盒。他的那份几乎只吃了一半，就合上了盖子，叠在一个未打开的午餐盒上，旁边是一盒姜饼饼干。
He laid his head atop his crossed arms, his eyes catching sight of the potted plants on the windowsill.
他把头靠在交叉的双臂上，目光落在窗台上的盆栽植物上。
“How is it that you take better care of these plants than your own health?”
“你怎么对这些植物的照顾比对自己的健康还要好？”
“They produce the oxygen we breathe, Joonghyuk-ah,” he said, moving one of the plants to the other window for better sunlight. “So without them, I’d die. So by taking care of them, doesn’t that mean I’m taking care of myself too?”
“它们产生我们呼吸的氧气，中赫啊，”他说着，把其中一株植物移到另一个窗户以获得更好的阳光。“所以没有它们，我会死。所以照顾它们，不就意味着我也在照顾自己吗？”
Yoo Joonghyuk made a face. “What kind of dumb logic is that.”
“这是什么愚蠢的逻辑。”刘众赫皱起了脸。
Kim Dokja laughed, covering his mouth from view with his hand. “You could’ve just humored me.” The evening sunlight caressed the side of his face and kissed the corner of his eye, projecting a gold crescent along his chocolate-colored iris.
金独子笑了，用手遮住了嘴。“你本可以顺着我的意思来的。”夕阳的光线轻抚着他的脸颊，亲吻着他的眼角，在他巧克力色的虹膜上投射出一道金色的月牙。
“Never,” Yoo Joonghyuk answered, focusing on how Kim Dokja’s lips were shaped in a carefree smile.
“永远不会。”刘众赫回答，目光集中在金独子那无忧无虑的笑容上。
Yoo Joonghyuk retrieved his water bottle from his bag and quietly watered every single plant in that room.
刘众赫从包里拿出水瓶，悄悄地给房间里的每一株植物浇水。
Are you not feeling well today? <<
你今天感觉不舒服吗？<<
Kim Dokja << 金独子 <<
Hey << 嘿 <<
When classes ended for the day, he took a different route than he usually did.
当一天的课程结束时，他走了一条与平常不同的路线。
Thirty minutes later, he was at a modest-looking apartment complex on the outskirts of Seoul. He climbed the couple flights of stairs and stopped in front of Kim Dokja’s apartment.
三十分钟后，他来到了首尔郊区一座看起来普通的公寓楼。他爬了几层楼梯，停在金独子的公寓门前。
He knocked swiftly, twice. When he didn’t hear any movement, he delivered three more knocks, this time with more force. “Kim Dokja.”
他迅速敲了两下门。当没有听到任何动静时，他又用力敲了三下。“金独子。”
Still no response. Was he asleep maybe?
仍然没有回应。他是不是睡着了？
Right when he was about to call him, he heard a voice.
就在他准备叫他时，他听到了一个声音。
“Yoo Joonghyuk? Is that you?”
“刘众赫？是你吗？”
“Open the door, Kim Dokja.”
“开门，金独子。”
“Wha—why are you here?” “什——你为什么在这里？”
“Why didn’t you answer my text?” he asked instead.
“你为什么不回我的短信？”他反问道。
He thought he heard a groan but then heard Kim Dokja reply, “I broke my phone yesterday so I didn’t know.”
他以为自己听到了一声呻吟，但随后听到金独子回答：“我昨天把手机摔坏了，所以不知道。”
Yoo Joonghyuk frowned but accepted his explanation for now. “Then why didn’t you come to school?”
刘众赫皱了皱眉，但暂时接受了他的解释。“那你为什么没来学校？”
“I just…” “我只是…”
He heard some rustling and a quiet groan—so he wasn’t imagining it the first time. “Hey. Are you okay?”
“他听到一些沙沙声和一声轻微的呻吟——所以他第一次并没有听错。‘嘿，你还好吗？’”
“Yeah, I’m fine. I just didn’t feel that well so I took the day off.”
“嗯，我没事。我只是感觉不太舒服，所以请了一天假。”
“Did you take any medicine?”
“你吃药了吗？”
“I’ll feel better once I sleep some more.”
“我再多睡一会儿就会感觉好些了。”
Yoo Joonghyuk placed a hand on the doorknob. “Then can I come in?”
“刘众赫把手放在门把手上。“那我可以进来吗？””
“…Not today. Sorry, I’m kind of tired.”
“……今天不行。抱歉，我有点累了。”
He frowned, noting that something was off about his demeanor but he couldn’t place a specific reason why. “Mia made some snacks yesterday and want you to try it.”
“他皱起眉头，注意到他的举止有些不对劲，但说不出具体原因。“米娅昨天做了些零食，想让你尝尝。””
He heard him laugh briefly. “I’ll try it tomorrow.”
“他听到他短暂地笑了笑。‘我明天试试。’”
“Or I can just drop it off inside.”
“‘或者我可以直接把它放在里面。’”
“Yoo Joonghyuk, how about tomorrow? Tell Mia I’m sorry but I’ll make it up to her by getting some of Persephone’s cakes.”
“‘刘众赫，明天怎么样？告诉米娅我很抱歉，但我会买些珀耳塞福涅的蛋糕来补偿她。’”
He frowned. Why was Kim Dokja being so difficult? Was he embarrassed about the state of his room or perhaps his appearance? Yoo Joonghyuk had been over to his place several times now and usually, Kim Dokja had literally just rolled out of bed and would welcome him in his pajamas with that dumb smile of his.
他皱起眉头。为什么金独子这么难搞？他是对自己的房间状态感到尴尬，还是对自己的外表感到尴尬？刘众赫已经去过他家好几次了，通常金独子都是刚从床上爬起来，穿着睡衣，带着那傻笑迎接他。
For some reason, Yoo Joonghyuk felt really irritated at his repeated attempts to shoo him away. But at the same time, he grew increasingly concerned at his peculiar behavior.
不知为何，刘众赫对他一再试图赶走自己感到非常恼火。但与此同时，他对金独子这种奇怪的行为越来越担心。
“I know your passcode.” “我知道你的密码。”
There was a short pause before he heard the muffled voice. “No, you don’t.”
短暂的停顿后，他听到了闷闷的声音。“不，你没有。”
“Kim Dokja.” “金独子。”
“Yoo Joonghyuk, why are you being so annoying today?”
“Yoo Joonghyuk，你今天怎么这么烦人？”
“Like I said, I know your passcode.”
“就像我说的，我知道你的密码。”
He heard him scoff. 他听到他不屑地哼了一声。
Yoo Joonghyuk started punching in the numbers, digging into the buttons ‘1’, ‘8’, ‘6’, and ‘3’, with more force than necessary.
刘众赫开始输入数字，用力地按下了‘1’、‘8’、‘6’和‘3’，力度比必要的还要大。
“And like I said, you don’t know—hey, what the hell?!”
“就像我说的，你不知道——嘿，搞什么鬼？！”
With the welcoming jingle, Yoo Joonghyuk flung open the door and couldn’t contain his smug grin.
伴随着欢迎的铃声，刘众赫猛地推开门，忍不住露出了得意的笑容。
With the lights turned off, the room was bathed only by the sunlight streaming in.
灯关掉后，房间里只有阳光洒进来。
His eyes landed on Kim Dokja—or rather, Kim Dokja who was buried under the blankets on the bed. He shut the door and sighed as he removed his shoes. As he made his way over, his gaze averted to the lone desk in the corner, with no other furniture to accompany it. Everything on the desk remained in the same position since his last visit but was now joined by an empty ramen cup, which made him frown in mild disgust.
他的目光落在金独子身上——或者更准确地说，是落在床上被毯子埋住的金独子身上。他关上门，叹了口气，脱下鞋子。当他走过去时，目光转向角落里那张孤零零的桌子，没有其他家具陪伴。桌子上的一切都和他上次来访时一样，只是多了一个空的泡面杯，这让他微微皱眉，感到一丝厌恶。
“Why are you eating ramen when you’re sick?”
“你生病了为什么还要吃泡面？”
He stared at his friend-turned-lump on the bed. When he didn’t receive a response, he said, “Hey.”
“他盯着床上那个已经变成一团的朋友。没有得到回应后，他说：‘嘿。’”
“…I can report you for trespassing.”
“‘……我可以告你非法入侵。’”
Yoo Joonghyuk scoffed. “It’s not like you don’t enter mine whenever you want.”
“刘众赫嗤之以鼻。‘你又不是没随时进过我的房间。’”
“You literally told me the passcode, you sunfish bastard!”
“你明明告诉了我密码，你这个蠢货！”
“Kim Dokja.” “金独子。”
There was a quiet ‘hmph!’ and the blankets were pulled closer together. He narrowed his eyes and grasped the edge of the bedding.
传来一声轻轻的“哼！”，毯子被拉得更紧了。他眯起眼睛，抓住了被子的边缘。
“You’re going to suffocate in there,” Yoo Joonghyuk gritted as he yanked at the blankets. He was met with surprising resistance.
“你会闷死在里面的，”刘众赫咬牙切齿地说，一边用力拉扯毯子。他遇到了出乎意料的阻力。
“Why are you so stubborn!” Kim Dokja didn’t budge. “Yoo Joonghyuk, it’s fine. You don’t want to catch my germs either, right? Really, I’m fine.”
“你为什么这么固执！”金独子一动不动。“刘众赫，没事的。你也不想传染上我的病菌吧？真的，我没事。”
“You’re clearly not if you’re hiding in there.” With his apprehension growing by the second and his pettiness growing at an even faster pace, he smacked Kim Dokja on what he presumed was his shoulder, which elicited a yelp. In this brief moment of distraction, Yoo Joonghyuk was able to successfully yank the bedding away with a triumphant smirk.
“你显然不是没事，如果你躲在那里的话。”随着他的担忧每秒钟都在增加，而他的小气则以更快的速度增长，他拍了拍他认为是金独子肩膀的地方，引来了对方的一声尖叫。在这短暂的分散注意力的时刻，刘众赫成功地扯开了被子，露出了胜利的微笑。
However, that expression quickly faded when he finally caught a glimpse of his friend.
然而，当他终于瞥见朋友的那一刻，那表情迅速消失了。
Even though his bed was positioned away from the window, the shadows failed to hide the hideous bruises decorating his limbs. They were accompanied by dried blood that outlined multiple scrapes and lacerations.
尽管他的床远离窗户，阴影却未能掩盖他四肢上那些丑陋的淤青。它们伴随着干涸的血迹，勾勒出多处擦伤和裂口。
Wordlessly, Yoo Joonghyuk sank down onto the bed.
刘众赫无言地坐到了床上。
Kim Dokja glanced up at him through his right eye. His left eye was swollen shut, demarcated by violets and blues. He slowly sat up, pulling the covers up as far as he could in a feeble attempt to hide his injuries. He picked at a loose thread on the hem of the blanket, rolling it between the pads of his fingers. “Stupid sunfish… are you satisfied now? Really, I’m fine, so Yoo Joonghyuk—”
"金独子用右眼瞥了他一眼。他的左眼肿得睁不开，周围布满了紫色和青色的淤青。他慢慢坐起来，尽可能地把被子拉高，试图虚弱地掩盖自己的伤势。他拨弄着被角上的一根松线，用指尖轻轻揉搓着。“愚蠢的太阳鱼……你现在满意了吗？真的，我没事，所以刘众赫——”
“What part of you is fine?” His calm tone barely masked the quiet fury that was roaring within. “Who did this to you? It was Song Minwoo, wasn’t it?” He stared at his bruises and imagined Song Minwoo and his friends ganging up on Kim Dokja, which only served to fuel the flames of rage inside. He gripped the blankets until his knuckles turned white. With a clenched jaw, he raised his tone. “I’m going to kill that motherf—”
“你哪里没事了？”他平静的语气几乎掩盖不住内心咆哮的怒火。“是谁干的？是宋敏宇，对吧？”他盯着他的淤青，想象着宋敏宇和他的朋友们围攻金独子的情景，这只会让他内心的怒火更加炽烈。他紧紧抓住被子，直到指节发白。他咬紧牙关，提高了声音。“我要杀了那个混蛋——”
“Joonghyuk-ah.” “Joonghyuk-ah。”
Kim Dokja gave him a lopsided grin, which only accentuated the swelling on his cheek.
金独子给了他一个歪斜的笑容，这反而更凸显了他脸颊上的肿胀。
This stubborn fool. 这个固执的傻瓜。
“It’s okay.” His grin widened further. “I’m okay.”
“没关系。”他的笑容更加灿烂了。“我没事。”
Yoo Joonghyuk’s eyes surveyed the injuries on his body before pausing on a particularly nasty bruise peeking out from the sleeve of his T-shirt. He thought back to earlier and belatedly realized that when Kim Dokja was under the covers, what he had slapped was actually his bruised shoulder.
刘众赫的目光扫过他身上的伤口，最后停在他 T 恤袖子下露出的一个特别严重的淤青上。他回想起之前的情景，才意识到当金独子躲在被子里时，他拍到的其实是对方受伤的肩膀。
He gritted his teeth and felt his nails digging into his palm, threatening to draw blood. “I’m taking you to the hospital.”
他咬紧牙关，感觉到指甲深深嵌入掌心，几乎要划出血来。“我带你去医院。”
“No,” came his resolute answer before Yoo Joonghyuk could even complete his sentence.
“不，”在刘众赫说完之前，他就给出了坚决的回答。
“Kim Dokja.” “金独子。”
“I’m not going.” “我不去。”
“But we need to make sure nothing else is wrong. And your injuries need to be taken care of.”
“但我们需要确保没有其他问题。而且你的伤需要处理。”
“I can bandage them up myself,” Kim Dokja quickly said, before following up with a quiet, “Just… not the hospital. Please.”
“我可以自己包扎，”金独子迅速说道，随后又轻声补充道，“只是……别去医院。拜托了。”
Yoo Joonghyuk perceived the tremble in his intonation and the turbulence in his pupils. He released his own shaky sigh. “If you’re not getting any better in the next few days, I’m taking you to the doctor’s office.”
刘众赫察觉到他语调中的颤抖和瞳孔中的波动。他叹了口气，声音也有些颤抖。“如果接下来几天你没有好转，我就带你去诊所。”
Kim Dokja silently nodded.
金独子默默点了点头。
He carefully stood up from the bed, ensuring that his movements didn’t shake the bed too much, resulting in him accidentally causing Kim Dokja unnecessary pain. “Stay here.”
他小心翼翼地从床上站起来，确保自己的动作不会让床晃动得太厉害，以免不小心给金独子带来不必要的痛苦。“待在这里。”
“That was always the plan.” Kim Dokja said, with a small but teasing smile. “Where would I even go?”
“这本来就是计划。”金独子带着一丝戏谑的微笑说道。“我还能去哪儿呢？”
“Kim Dokja.” “金独子。”
He met his intense gaze before shifting his eyes, noting that he wasn’t in the mood for banter. “Okay, fine.”
他迎上对方那炽热的目光，随后移开视线，意识到对方此刻没有心情开玩笑。“好吧，行吧。”
After a quick phone call with his sister and ensuring that she was able to go over to Shin Yoosung’s house, he rushed to the nearest supermarket to grab the supplies he needed. He returned to Kim Dokja’s apartment as quickly as he could, armed with several bags of various items.
在快速与妹妹通完电话并确保她能去申宥胜家后，他急忙赶到最近的超市购买所需的物品。他尽可能快地回到金独子的公寓，手里提着几袋各种各样的东西。
“I should change my passcode,” Kim Dokja mumbled offhandedly.
“我应该改一下我的密码，”金独子随口嘟囔道。
Yoo Joonghyuk set the bags on the countertop and shelved some of the items into the, as he expected, empty fridge. He was glad he decided to grab some groceries in anticipation of this. Though it seemed like the sight of the ingredients alone was enough to elicit a low grumble from Kim Dokja’s stomach.
刘众赫把袋子放在台面上，并将一些物品放进他预料中空荡荡的冰箱里。他很高兴自己决定提前买些食材。尽管看起来光是看到这些食材就足以让金独子的肚子发出低沉的咕噜声。
“…When did you last eat, Kim Dokja.”
“……你上次吃饭是什么时候，金独子。”
“I already ate.” “我已经吃过了。”
He looked at him. 他看着他。
“…A little bit ago.” “…刚才。”
Yoo Joonghyuk continued looking at him.
Yoo Joonghyuk 继续看着他。
“Okay, earlier than that.” At his persistently suspicious gaze, Kim Dokja finally admitted, “…Yesterday afternoon.”
“好吧，比那更早。”在他持续怀疑的目光下，金独子终于承认了，“……昨天下午。”
Yoo Joonghyuk glared and promptly shoved the bags of medical supplies to the side. “I’m making you dinner first.” There would be no point in treating his injuries if he didn’t even have the strength to recover from them.
刘众赫瞪了一眼，迅速将医疗用品袋推到一边。“我先给你做晚饭。”如果他没有力气从伤势中恢复，治疗他的伤也没有意义。
“No, you don’t need to—”
“不，你不需要——”
Paying no mind to his protest, Yoo Joonghyuk quickly worked his magic in the kitchen and before long, he brought over a hearty bowl of noodles topped with various vegetables and seafood. He handed the bowl and chopsticks to Kim Dokja. “Eat. All of it.”
无视他的抗议，刘众赫迅速在厨房施展了他的魔法，不久后，他端来了一碗丰盛的面条，上面铺满了各种蔬菜和海鲜。他把碗和筷子递给金独子。“吃。全部吃完。”
With a light huff, Kim Dokja gingerly grabbed the bowl, cupping his fingers around it. He stared at the bowl, seemingly in deep thought and made no move to start eating.
金独子轻轻叹了口气，小心翼翼地接过碗，手指环绕着碗边。他盯着碗，似乎在深思，却没有开始吃的动作。
Yoo Joonghyuk was about to scold him when his gaze wandered once again to the ugly bruises on his arms. Did it perhaps hurt to use his arms…? He glanced back at the bowl and opened his mouth to say, “Do you need me to feed you?”
刘众赫正要责备他，目光再次落在他手臂上那些难看的淤青上。是不是用胳膊会疼……？他瞥了一眼碗，开口说道：“需要我喂你吗？”
Kim Dokja snapped out of his reverie with a bewildered expression. “Yoo Joonghyuk, I didn’t get hurt that badly. I can still use my arms.”
金独子从恍惚中回过神来，一脸困惑。“刘众赫，我没受那么重的伤。我的手臂还能用。”
Well, you should’ve never gotten hurt in the first place. He motioned towards the steaming bowl. “Then why aren’t you eating?”
你一开始就不该受伤的。他指了指冒着热气的碗。“那你为什么不吃？”
“I was just… thinking about something.”
“我只是……在想一些事情。”
“Stop thinking and eat. It’s getting cold.”
“别想了，快吃吧。要凉了。”
Kim Dokja rolled his eyes. “Yes, mother.” He clumsily lifted a handful of noodles with his chopsticks. However, right when he leaned in, the noodles slipped through the chopsticks and landed back into the bowl, splattering the hot liquid onto his face. With a surprised yelp, he backed away from the bowl.
金独子翻了个白眼。“是的，妈妈。”他笨拙地用筷子夹起一撮面条。然而，就在他凑近时，面条从筷子间滑落，掉回碗里，溅出的热汤泼到了他的脸上。他惊讶地叫了一声，赶紧从碗边退开。
Yoo Joonghyuk couldn’t help but let out a small laugh at his reaction. Though when he sensed a glare in his direction, he coughed and went to grab some napkins from the kitchen. When he returned, he wiped the soup from Kim Dokja’s face, who was now sulking with his head turned. Yoo Joonghyuk bit his lip, failing to hide the smile forming on his lips.
刘众赫忍不住对他的反应轻笑了一声。不过当他感觉到一道目光瞪向他时，他咳嗽了一声，起身去厨房拿了些纸巾。回来后，他擦掉了金独子脸上的汤，而金独子此时正扭着头生闷气。刘众赫咬住嘴唇，无法掩饰嘴角浮现的笑意。
“This wouldn’t have happened if you took up my offer.”
“如果你接受我的提议，这种事就不会发生了。”
“Shut up,” Kim Dokja growled and resumed eating, taking extra care to avoid embarrassing himself again. His eyes lit up as he slurped the noodles. He was about to take another bite when he felt a strong gaze piercing the side of his face. He set his chopsticks back into the bowl and raised an eyebrow. “Are you just going to stand there and watch me eat?”
“闭嘴，”金独子咆哮道，然后继续吃饭，格外小心以免再次让自己尴尬。他吸溜着面条，眼睛亮了起来。他正要再吃一口时，感觉到一股强烈的目光刺向他的脸侧。他把筷子放回碗里，挑了挑眉。“你就打算站在那里看着我吃吗？”
“I’m making sure you eat everything.”
“我要确保你把所有东西都吃完。”
“You have such little faith in me.” Kim Dokja glanced at him before sighing and shifting to the left. “It’s tiring standing there.” He patted the spot next to him. “You can sit here.”
“你对我这么没信心。”金独子瞥了他一眼，叹了口气，往左边挪了挪。“站在那里很累的。”他拍了拍旁边的位置。“你可以坐这里。”
“No.” “不。”
Kim Dokja frowned. “Haven’t I been listening to your demands today? Just sit here, you damn sunfish.”
金独子皱起眉头。“我今天不是一直在听你的要求吗？就坐在这儿吧，你这该死的翻车鱼。”
Yoo Joonghyuk narrowed his eyes but slowly sat down on the edge of the bed. “Happy?”
刘众赫眯起眼睛，但慢慢地在床边坐了下来。“满意了吗？”
With a content nod, Kim Dokja resumed eating. He stabbed a piece of shrimp with his chopsticks and after a few quick puffs to cool it down, he munched down on the seafood with a satisfied smile. He was about to pierce another of its comrades when he caught Yoo Joonghyuk still observing him. “Hey, where’s your share?”
金独子满意地点了点头，继续吃饭。他用筷子戳起一块虾，快速吹了几口气让它冷却，然后心满意足地咀嚼着海鲜。他正要戳起另一块时，发现刘众赫还在看着他。“嘿，你的那份呢？”
“I’ll eat when I get home.”
“我回家再吃。”
He squinted his eyes at the pot sitting on the stove. “You made a lot though?”
他眯起眼睛看着炉子上的锅。“你做了很多吗？”
“Those are leftovers for you for the next couple days.”
“那些是给你接下来几天的剩菜。”
“Oh.” Kim Dokja swallowed the bite he just took. “Um, thanks.”
“哦。”金独子咽下刚咬的一口。“嗯，谢谢。”
Yoo Joonghyuk nodded. “Let me know if you want more.” He noticed the pillow was haphazardly propped up behind Kim Dokja’s back. Gesturing at him to lean forward, he fluffed and straightened out the pillow. “Your back is going to be even sorer if you sit like that.” He also pulled the covers further up, burying the bruises peeking through the fabric.
“刘众赫点了点头。“如果你还想要更多，就告诉我。”他注意到枕头随意地垫在金独子背后。示意他向前倾身，他拍了拍枕头并把它摆正。“如果你这样坐，背会更疼的。”他还把被子往上拉了拉，遮住了从布料中露出的淤青。”
“Of course you’d be the type to worry about posture.” The lopsided teasing smile was filled with this calm mirth—and Yoo Joonghyuk felt his chest constrict at the sight before him.
“你当然是那种会担心姿势的人。”那歪斜的调侃笑容中充满了平静的愉悦——刘众赫看着眼前的景象，感到胸口一阵紧缩。”
“How’s the eye?” He brought a hand up to it, delicately caressing the air surrounding the inflamed area.
“眼睛怎么样了？”他抬起手，轻轻抚摸着发炎部位周围的空气。”
“It’s fine.” He proceeded to scarf down the rest of the noodles, nearly finished with it. He waved his chopsticks and said, “I feel like it looks a lot worse than what it actually feels.”
“没事。”他继续狼吞虎咽地吃完了剩下的面条，几乎快吃完了。他挥了挥筷子说：“我觉得看起来比实际感觉要糟糕得多。”
Liar. He rose from the bed. “Keep eating. I’m going to start treating your injuries.”
骗子。他从床上起身。“继续吃吧。我要开始处理你的伤了。”
“Yoo Joonghyuk, it’s fine—”
“Yoo Joonghyuk，没关系的——”
“If you say ‘I’m fine’ one more time, I’m going to kill you.”
“如果你再说一次‘我没事’，我就杀了你。”
“Well technically, I said ‘It’s fine’.”
“严格来说，我说的是‘没关系’。”
“Kim Dokja.” “金独子。”
He snickered. 他窃笑起来。
When Yoo Joonghyuk returned with the bags of medical supplies that he grabbed from the kitchen, Kim Dokja gawked.
当刘众赫带着从厨房拿来的医疗用品回来时，金独子目瞪口呆。
“Why’d you buy all this?” He raised his eyebrows, unable to mask his incredulous tone as Yoo Joonghyuk emptied the contents of the bags and setting up a seemingly makeshift medical camp.
“你为什么要买这么多？”他扬起眉毛，无法掩饰自己难以置信的语气，刘众赫将袋子里的东西倒出来，搭建起一个看似临时的医疗营地。
“Because I know you don’t have a first aid kit.”
“因为我知道你没有急救箱。”
“Every household has one.”
“家家户户都有一个。”
“Then where’s yours?” “那你的呢？”
Kim Dokja averted his gaze and gestured his chopsticks vaguely towards the kitchen. “It just needs to be restocked.”
金独子移开视线，用筷子随意指了指厨房。“只是需要补货了。”
“You mean it was never stocked in the first place.” Seeing that Kim Dokja was finished eating, he removed the bowl from his hands and then gently pressed an ice pack against the swollen eye. “Hold this.”
“你是说一开始就没存货吧。”看到金独子吃完了，他接过碗，然后轻轻地把冰袋按在他肿胀的眼睛上。“拿着这个。”
Yoo Joonghyuk silently peeled back the comforter, fighting to swallow down the bile rising up his esophagus as he methodically thought about where to start. His fingers dug into a damp towel as he began gently cleaning the dried blood around a particularly nasty-looking gash on his knee. Fortunately, it didn’t look infected but he would have to keep an eye on it. He dropped the towel in the basin, its clear water becoming imbued with red.
刘众赫默默地掀开被子，努力咽下涌上食道的胆汁，有条不紊地思考着从哪里开始。他的手指紧紧抓住一条湿毛巾，开始轻轻地清理膝盖上一道看起来特别严重的伤口周围干涸的血迹。幸运的是，伤口看起来没有感染，但他必须密切关注它。他把毛巾丢进水盆里，清澈的水立刻被染成了红色。
“Yoo Joonghyuk.” “Yoo Joonghyuk。”
“What.” He unfurled a new roll of gauze.
“什么。”他展开一卷新的纱布。
“Maybe you should become a nurse instead of a gamer.”
“也许你应该当护士而不是游戏玩家。”
Yoo Joonghyuk shot him an unimpressed look as he continued to place fresh bandages on the cuts. “And maybe you should learn to take better care of yourself.”
刘众赫给了他一个不以为然的眼神，继续为他包扎伤口上的新绷带。“也许你应该学会更好地照顾自己。”
“I’m—” Kim Dokja cut himself off and pressed his lips together in a bright smile. “—doing peachy.”
“我——”金独子突然停住，抿起嘴唇露出灿烂的笑容。“——好得很。”
Yoo Joonghyuk really wanted to smack that infuriating grin off his face. Out of pettiness, he tied the bandage a bit tighter than he originally intended, ignoring the dirty look directed at him.
刘众赫真的很想把他脸上那令人恼火的笑容打掉。出于小气，他把绷带绑得比原本打算的紧了一些，无视了对方投来的不满眼神。
After all the cuts were taken care of, he moved on to the bruises that were spattered haphazardly on his body. His jaw tensed up once more as he tried to restrain his temper from spiraling out of control. With a deep breath, he dug through the bag for the salve he purchased. However, he couldn’t find it anywhere on the bed. He rummaged through the supplies again and frowned. Did he misplace it somewhere? His gaze flickered around the bed once more before pausing on Kim Dokja and spotted the box that he was searching for in his hands.
处理好所有的伤口后，他开始处理身上随意散布的淤青。他的下颌再次紧绷，试图控制住即将失控的脾气。深吸一口气，他在包里翻找着之前买的药膏。然而，床上哪儿都找不到。他又翻了一遍用品，皱起了眉头。难道他把它放错地方了？他的目光再次在床上扫视，最后停在金独子身上，发现他手里正拿着自己寻找的那个盒子。
“I need that.” “我需要那个。”
Kim Dokja turned the box between his fingers with a rather fond expression on his face. “It’s a cute design, don’t you think?” He pointed at the fluffy dokkaebi on the box.
金独子用手指转动着盒子，脸上带着相当喜爱的表情。“这个设计很可爱，你不觉得吗？”他指着盒子上毛茸茸的独裁者说道。
Disregarding his comment, Yoo Joonghyuk grabbed the box and retrieved the ointment from inside. He gingerly pushed the sleeve of Kim Dokja’s T-shirt past his shoulder and began applying a generous amount of the salve to his upper arm.
无视他的评论，刘众赫抓起盒子，从里面取出药膏。他小心翼翼地推起金独子 T 恤的袖子，露出肩膀，开始在他的上臂上大量涂抹药膏。
The anger that initially consumed his mind had calmed down a bit but it was gradually becoming overshadowed by regret and guilt. He wondered if Song Minwoo was just waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike—specifically, when Yoo Joonghyuk wasn’t by Kim Dokja’s side. Or perhaps, it was his fault for not handling this better during his confrontation with Song Minwoo many months ago. It was foolish for him to think a warning would suffice given his track record and terrible personality.
最初占据他脑海的愤怒已经平息了一些，但逐渐被后悔和内疚所掩盖。他想知道宋敏宇是否只是在等待一个完美的时机出手——特别是当刘众赫不在金独子身边的时候。或者，也许是他几个月前与宋敏宇对峙时没有处理好这件事的错。他愚蠢地认为一个警告就足够了，考虑到宋敏宇的过往记录和糟糕的性格。
Yoo Joonghyuk practically crushed the tube of ointment in his hand. The next time I see him, I’m going to break his—
刘众赫几乎把药膏管捏碎了。下次见到他，我要打断他的——
Kim Dokja suddenly gasped in pain. The ice pack tumbled out of his grasp and onto the sheets with a soft thud.
金独子突然痛苦地倒吸了一口气。冰袋从他手中滑落，轻轻掉在被单上。
“What’s wrong?” Yoo Joonghyuk quickly removed his hand. He must’ve accidentally pressed too hard when he was too preoccupied with his thoughts, and the possibility of this made him want to berate himself. “Are you okay?”
“怎么了？”刘众赫迅速收回了手。他一定是太专注于自己的思绪，不小心按得太用力了，想到这一点，他恨不得责备自己。“你还好吗？”
Kim Dokja was bent over, clutching his forearm, his shoulders heaving up and down.
金独子弯下腰，紧紧抓住前臂，肩膀上下起伏。
Alarmed, Yoo Joonghyuk shoved the supplies to the edge of the bed and inched closer towards him. “Kim Dokja.”
惊慌之下，刘众赫将物资推到床边，缓缓向他靠近。“金独子。”
Kim Dokja abruptly lifted his head, and his distorted expression slowly morphed into a sly grin. He chuckled at the dumbfounded look he received. “Just kidding.”
金独子突然抬起头，扭曲的表情慢慢变成了狡猾的笑容。他对收到的目瞪口呆的表情笑了笑。“开玩笑的。”
His eyes widened before he felt his nostrils flaring. This insufferable bastard.
他的眼睛睁大，然后感觉到鼻孔在扩张。这个令人难以忍受的家伙。
He playfully tapped Yoo Joonghyuk’s forehead. “You’re going to get wrinkles before you hit twenty at this rate.” But seeing as how his joke was not received well, he gulped. “…You just looked so serious, I couldn’t help it.”
他调皮地拍了拍刘众赫的额头。“照这样下去，你二十岁之前就会长皱纹了。”但看到他的笑话没有得到好的回应，他咽了咽口水。“……你看起来太严肃了，我忍不住。”
“How can I not be,” he murmured, with thinly veiled anger, “when you got hurt this bad?”
“我怎么能不生气，”他低声说道，语气中带着难以掩饰的愤怒，“当你伤得这么重的时候？”
“…Yoo Joonghyuk.” His hand hovered closer towards his but Yoo Joonghyuk retracted his arm.
“……Yoo Joonghyuk。”他的手向对方靠近，但 Yoo Joonghyuk 却收回了手臂。
“I don’t get how you can make light of all this.” The last of his self-restraint was held by a thin, frayed thread. It was infuriating how Kim Dokja always projected this carefully constructed façade of distorted optimism. He concealed his scars with a blanket of apathy and reassurance—continuously fortifying the walls that Yoo Joonghyuk despise so much.
“我不明白你怎么能对这一切轻描淡写。”他最后的自制力被一根细弱、磨损的线所维系。金独子总是投射出这种精心构建的扭曲乐观假象，这令人愤怒。他用冷漠和安慰掩盖自己的伤痕——不断加固着刘众赫如此厌恶的墙壁。
Kim Dokja stared off to the side, laying his arm back down on his lap. “Then would you prefer if I felt sorry for myself all the time?” With a sigh that contained enough weight to crush Yoo Joonghyuk’s spirits, he remarked, “What’s happened has already happened.”
金独子侧目凝视，将手臂放回膝盖上。“那你希望我一直自怨自艾吗？”他叹了口气，那叹息的重量足以压垮刘众赫的精神，他说道：“已经发生的事情无法改变。”
His eyes were dark, devoid of any light.
他的眼睛漆黑，没有任何光芒。
“How can you just say that?” Yoo Joonghyuk clenched his fists, wondering if that would somehow offset the tightness deep within his chest.
“你怎么能就这么说出来？”刘众赫紧握拳头，想着这是否能缓解他内心深处的那种紧绷感。
And in a distant voice, Kim Dokja whispered, “Because nothing’s going to change the ending of this story.”
金独子用遥远的声音低语道：“因为没有什么能改变这个故事的结局。”
Yoo Joonghyuk answered, “That’s because you’ve already given up without even trying.”
“那是因为你连试都没试就放弃了。”刘众赫回答道。
Kim Dokja whipped his head around, simultaneously stunned and wounded by accusations that easily slipped from his mouth. He replied in a quiet voice, “Who are you to judge that when you don’t even know me?” His chin was pulled taut, as he tried to rein in the drops of liquid beginning to accumulate along his eye. In a bristling tone, he said, “It hasn’t even been a year since we met, Yoo Joonghyuk.”
金独子猛地转过头，既震惊又受伤于那些轻易从他口中溜出的指责。他用低沉的声音回答：“你凭什么评判我？你甚至都不了解我。”他的下巴紧绷，试图控制住开始在眼眶中积聚的泪水。他用一种愤怒的语气说道：“我们认识还不到一年，刘众赫。”
Yoo Joonghyuk parted his lips in stunned silence.
刘众赫张了张嘴，震惊得说不出话来。
It stung. 它刺痛了。
But what stung most was the fact that he couldn’t refute those words. Because even now, he was still trapped outside those towering walls.
但最刺痛的是，他无法反驳那些话。因为即使现在，他仍然被困在那高墙之外。
The anger in his eyes faltered, slowly replaced by remorse as Kim Dokja processed what he said. “Yoo Joonghyuk, I—I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it that way, I just—”
他眼中的愤怒动摇了，随着金独子消化他所说的话，慢慢被悔恨取代。“刘众赫，我——对不起，我不是那个意思，我只是——”
And outside those walls, he would continue waiting, even when he wasn’t sure how long that would be.
而在那高墙之外，他会继续等待，即使他不确定那会是多久。
“Kim Dokja.” “金独子。”
However, there was one thing Yoo Joonghyuk knew for sure.
然而，有一件事刘众赫是确定的。
“Then I will change your story.”
“那么我会改变你的故事。”
The next day at school, Yoo Joonghyuk sat at his designated seat, staring at the vacant desk to his left. Though instead of feeling confused, he was aware it’d be empty today.
第二天在学校，刘众赫坐在他指定的座位上，盯着左边空着的桌子。尽管他没有感到困惑，但他知道今天那里会是空的。
After their disagreement last night, Yoo Joonghyuk finished bandaging up the rest of the wounds in silence while Kim Dokja also made no further comments. Even when he was cleaning up everything, the silence persisted. As Yoo Joonghyuk was collecting his belongings together, a small sigh escaped his lips.
昨晚的争执过后，刘众赫默默地包扎完剩下的伤口，而金独子也没有再发表任何评论。即使在他收拾一切的时候，沉默依然持续着。当刘众赫收拾好自己的物品时，他轻轻地叹了口气。
“Will you be going to school tomorrow?”
“你明天会去学校吗？”
“…No, I think I’ll be staying in again.”
“……不，我想我会再待在家里。”
That was an unexpected response and one that didn’t help dissipate the awkward air between them. Yoo Joonghyuk ducked his head and turned on his heel to leave. “Then I’ll come visit again tomorrow.” He lifted his bookbag onto his back but stilled when the contents jostled within. In the midst of everything, he completely forgot about the snacks he and Yoo Mia made together.
“那是个出乎意料的回答，而且并没有帮助他们之间尴尬的气氛消散。刘众赫低下头，转身离开。‘那我明天再来拜访。’他把书包背到背上，但里面的东西晃动时，他停了下来。在这一切之中，他完全忘记了他和刘美雅一起做的零食。”
“What is it?” he asked, eyeing the plastic container Yoo Joonghyuk grabbed from inside his bag.
“‘这是什么？’他问道，看着刘众赫从包里拿出的塑料容器。”
“Mia made gingerbread cookies. She wanted you to try them.” Yoo Joonghyuk was already walking to the kitchen as he said, “I’ll leave them here.”
“‘美雅做了姜饼饼干。她想让你尝尝。’刘众赫一边说，一边走向厨房，‘我把它们放在这里。’”
“Can I try it now?”
“我现在可以试试吗？”
Yoo Joonghyuk glanced over his shoulder and saw Kim Dokja extending his hand.
Yoo Joonghyuk 回头瞥了一眼，看到 Kim Dokja 伸出了手。
Kim Dokja removed the lid and lifted one of the gingerbread cookies, scrutinizing every detail of it. Though after he noticed Yoo Joonghyuk’s tense expression, his eyes softened and he laughed. “Relax, I’m not trying to be a food critic. That’s your job.” He waved the cookie in his hand and pointed at the scarfs. “I was just admiring the intricate design.”
金独子掀开盖子，拿起一块姜饼饼干，仔细端详着每一个细节。不过，当他注意到刘众赫紧张的表情时，他的眼神柔和了下来，笑了起来。“放松点，我不是在当美食评论家。那是你的工作。”他挥了挥手中的饼干，指了指围巾。“我只是在欣赏这复杂的设计。”
“Mia said they needed ‘stylish’ clothing,” he grumbled, remembering how Yoo Mia lamented the fact that they only had red, green, and white icing and how this limited her ‘artistic expression.’ So to appease his sister, Yoo Joonghyuk created different shades of red and green by mixing in varying amounts of white icing, and the results were both ombre scarves and a stubborn knot in his neck from bending down while making them.
“米娅说他们需要‘时尚’的衣服，”他抱怨道，想起了刘米娅抱怨他们只有红色、绿色和白色糖霜，这限制了她的‘艺术表达’。为了安抚妹妹，刘众赫通过混合不同量的白色糖霜，创造出了不同深浅的红色和绿色，结果不仅做出了渐变的围巾，还因为低头制作而在脖子上留下了一个顽固的结。
Kim Dokja took a bite. He munched slowly on the crisp texture and took another bite before imparting his final verdict: “Tell Mia I said she’s a budding pastry chef.”
金独子咬了一口。他慢慢地咀嚼着那酥脆的口感，又咬了一口，然后给出了最终的评价：“告诉米娅，我说她是个有潜力的糕点师。”
This prompted a low chuckle from Yoo Joonghyuk. “I will.”
这引来了刘众赫的低沉笑声。“我会的。”
“Oh, you also put truffles in here.” Kim Dokja picked one up and unfurled the wrapping before popping the confection into his mouth. “I remember trying them before at your apartment and liking them a lot.”
“哦，你还在这里放了松露。”金独子拿起一块，展开包装，然后把糖果放进嘴里。“我记得以前在你的公寓里尝过，非常喜欢。”
“I know.” “我知道。”
The chocolate continued melting in his mouth even when Kim Dokja stilled. Heat gathered along the base of his neck and pooled upward as he pointedly ignored his gaze.
巧克力在他嘴里继续融化，即使金独子已经静止不动。热量沿着他的脖子底部聚集，并向上蔓延，他刻意避开了对方的目光。
“…I’ll see you tomorrow then.” Yoo Joonghyuk zipped up his backpack and grasped the door handle.
“……那明天见。”刘众赫拉上背包拉链，握住了门把手。
“Joonghyuk-ah.” “Joonghyuk-ah。”
Yoo Joonghyuk turned his head.
Yoo Joonghyuk 转过头。
Kim Dokja rubbed the back of his neck and mumbled something incoherently.
金独子揉了揉后颈，含糊不清地嘟囔了几句。
He stood there, patiently waiting with hopeful anticipation.
他站在那里，满怀期待地耐心等待着。
Kim Dokja looked at him. In a timid yet steadfast voice, he said, “Thank you.”
金独子看着他，用怯懦却坚定的声音说道：“谢谢你。”
Those two words traversed the distance between them, cutting through the lingering tension in the room. In response, he nodded, an enigmatic smile forming. “I’ll tell Mia you liked the cookies.”
“那两个字穿越了他们之间的距离，切断了房间里挥之不去的紧张气氛。作为回应，他点了点头，露出一个神秘的微笑。‘我会告诉米娅你喜欢这些饼干。’”
“Huh?” Yoo Joonghyuk thought it was almost endearing how Kim Dokja widened his eyes ever so slightly in confusion. “Wait, that’s not what I—”
“嗯？”刘众赫觉得金独子微微睁大眼睛的困惑表情几乎有些可爱。“等等，我不是那个意思——”
“I know,” he interrupted. “I was just kidding.” At his flabbergasted expression, Yoo Joonghyuk filled the room with an airy laugh. “I’ll be leaving now.”
“我知道，”他打断道。“我只是在开玩笑。”看到他目瞪口呆的表情，刘众赫在房间里发出了一阵轻松的笑声。“我现在要走了。”
His cheeks felt warm. “Ah, um, okay. And I’ll—ah, I guess I can’t text you since my phone’s broken.”
他的脸颊感到一阵发热。“啊，嗯，好的。那我——啊，我想我没法给你发短信了，因为我的手机坏了。”
“We’ll go shopping for a new one when you’re better.”
“等你好了，我们就去买个新的。”
“Okay,” Kim Dokja agreed readily, a smile blooming upon his features. “Let’s do that then.”
“好吧，”金独子爽快地同意了，脸上绽放出笑容。“那我们就这么做吧。”
And with that in mind, Yoo Joonghyuk was currently browsing through the latest models on his phone and reading through articles that compared them. However, as he mindlessly scrolled through the browser, he knew that this was a fruitless attempt at redirecting his focus from what had been plaguing his mind.
带着这样的想法，刘众赫正在手机上浏览最新型号，并阅读比较它们的文章。然而，当他心不在焉地滚动浏览器时，他知道这只是徒劳地试图将注意力从困扰他的事情上转移开。
“Hey, go get some bread.”
“嘿，去买点面包吧。”
“Minwoo hyung, do you want some too?”
“珉宇哥，你也要来点吗？”
“Get me two.” “给我来两份。”
Yoo Joonghyuk watched Song Minwoo converse with his friends, his obnoxious laughter ringing in his ears. He gripped his phone, his knuckles becoming pale. His eyes never left him, even when their teacher arrived to begin class.
刘众赫看着宋珉宇和他的朋友们交谈，他那刺耳的笑声在耳边回响。他紧握着手机，指节发白。即使老师进来开始上课，他的目光也从未离开过他。
As Song Minwoo was settling in his seat, he caught Yoo Joonghyuk staring. With a snarl, he said, “The hell you staring at?”
当宋敏宇刚坐下时，他注意到刘众赫正盯着他看。他咆哮道：“你他妈看什么看？”
“Song Minwoo, sit down!” the teacher scolded.
“宋敏宇，坐下！”老师训斥道。
He growled and sent one last glare before sitting down in his seat.
他低吼了一声，最后瞪了一眼，然后坐回了自己的座位。
Yoo Joonghyuk burned holes into the back of Song Minwoo’s head all morning. He wanted nothing more than to throttle his neck, demanding him to apologize to Kim Dokja for hurting him, for torturing him, for tormenting him. However…
刘众赫整个早上都在盯着宋敏宇的后脑勺，仿佛要烧出洞来。他恨不得掐住他的脖子，逼他为伤害金独子、折磨金独子、折磨金独子而道歉。然而……
“Joonghyuk-ah.” “Joonghyuk-ah。”
On the rooftop, Yoo Joonghyuk stared out at the crisp, blue sky and its endless boundaries. He crossed his arms on the ledge, feeling the chill of the stone seep through his uniform.
在天台上，刘众赫凝视着那清澈的蓝天及其无尽的边界。他将双臂交叉放在栏杆上，感受着石头的寒意透过制服渗入肌肤。
“It’s okay.” “没关系。”
He breathed out slowly, watching how his breath condensed into fleeting clouds.
他缓缓呼出一口气，看着自己的呼吸凝结成转瞬即逝的云朵。
“I’m okay.” “我没事。”
The door to the rooftop suddenly slammed against the wall.
通往天台的门突然猛地撞在墙上。
Yoo Joonghyuk turned around and spotted Song Minwoo sauntering towards him.
刘众赫转过身，看到宋敏浩正朝他走来。
“I’ve been looking for you.” He stopped a short distance away, pocketing his hands. “Fuck, you’ve been staring at me all day and it was pissing me off.”
“我一直在找你。”他在不远处停下，把手插进口袋。“妈的，你一整天都在盯着我看，真是让我火大。”
“Joonghyuk-ah.” “Joonghyuk-ah。”
Kim Dokja. 金独子。
Yoo Joonghyuk clamped his teeth together. “Get out of my sight.”
刘众赫咬紧牙关。“从我眼前消失。”
Upon noticing how his hands were locked into fists, Song Minwoo raised an eyebrow. “Seems like someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed today.”
注意到他的手紧握成拳，宋敏宇挑了挑眉。“看来今天有人起床气不小啊。”
“It’s okay.” “没关系。”
It’s not okay. 这不行。
Yoo Joonghyuk started walking past him but Song Minwoo gripped his shoulder. “Hey, I’m talking to you—”
刘众赫从他身边走过，但宋旻浩抓住了他的肩膀。“喂，我在跟你说话——”
A fist suddenly whipped through the air, whacking him in the cheek. Completely taken aback, he was about to land on the ground but was able to steady himself by digging his right foot into the ground at the last second.
一只拳头突然划破空气，猛地击中了他的脸颊。他完全措手不及，眼看就要摔倒在地，但在最后一刻，他右脚用力踩住地面，稳住了自己。
“And here I thought we could do this the civil way.” He spat on the ground, coating the concrete with blood-tinged saliva.
“我还以为我们可以用文明的方式解决。”他朝地上吐了一口唾沫，血色的唾液染红了水泥地面。
“I’m okay.” “我没事。”
I’m not okay. 我不好。
“I warned you to never bother him again.”
“我警告过你别再打扰他。”
“The fuck are you talking about, you bastard.” Though everything about this seemed like déjà vu, and it finally dawned on Song Minwoo why.
“你他妈在说什么，混蛋。”尽管这一切都像是似曾相识，宋旻浩终于明白了为什么。
“Ah,” he drawled, “you mean Kim Psycho?”
“啊，”他拖长了音调，“你是说 Kim Psycho？”
Yoo Joonghyuk advanced a step forward and launched his fist towards his gut. Song Minwoo sidestepped his attack and pivoted around to retaliate, the tip of his shoe striking his ribs. Taking a deep breath, he sneered, “And here I thought it’d be something else. At least something not so pathetic.”
刘众赫向前迈了一步，拳头直击对方的腹部。宋敏宇侧身躲过他的攻击，转身反击，鞋尖击中了他的肋骨。他深吸一口气，冷笑道：“我还以为会有什么不一样的呢。至少不会这么可怜。”
Yoo Joonghyuk swung his fist again but it collided with Song Minwoo’s palm.
刘众赫再次挥拳，但拳头撞上了宋敏宇的手掌。
“Don’t tell me you’re trying to avenge him or some shit?” He threw his head back, and an almost maniac laugh burst from his mouth. But just as quick as it came, it was completely gone as he said, “How touching.”
“别告诉我你是想为他报仇还是什么的？”他仰起头，发出一阵近乎疯狂的笑声。但笑声来得快去得也快，他随即说道：“真是感人。”
“Shut up,” he growled. “闭嘴。”他低吼道。
Song Minwoo leered at him, inching closer. “The little snitch had it coming. It was payback for tattling to you about everything.”
宋敏宇斜眼看着他，慢慢靠近。“那个小告密者活该。这是对他向你告密一切的报复。”
“What nonsense are you going on about now.”
“你现在又在胡说什么。”
“No need to pretend.” Song Minwoo leaned back, a cold glare settling back in. “Or why else would my father be suddenly laid off? It’s the most natural explanation.”
“没必要装傻。”宋敏宇往后一靠，眼神重新变得冰冷。“不然我父亲怎么会突然被解雇？这是最自然的解释。”
“Kim Dokja had nothing to do with that.” Kim Dokja would be the last person to ever share the hardships he endured. Because that was the type of person he was—wholly selfless in his own selfish way. “If you wanted to confront someone about that, it should’ve been me.”
“金独子与那件事无关。”金独子绝不会向任何人分享他所经历的苦难。因为他是那种人——以自己自私的方式完全无私。“如果你想找人理论，那应该是我。”
“But Kim Psycho and I go way back.” An unhinged smirk formed. “It’s a lot easier talking sense with him. Even if it’s mainly one-sided.”
“但我和金疯子是老交情了。”一个疯狂的微笑浮现。“和他讲道理要容易得多。即使主要是单方面的。”
“You bastard.” He lunged forward, clutching his collar with trembling fists.
“你这混蛋。”他猛地扑上前，用颤抖的拳头抓住对方的衣领。
Gloating, he continued, “But I was shocked when Kim Psycho actually fought back. That was definitely a first. I have to admit—it was entertaining to see him try so hard.” He smiled. “Not that it mattered. The end result was the same and will always be the same.”
“他得意洋洋地继续说道，‘但让我震惊的是，金疯子居然还手了。这绝对是第一次。我得承认——看到他那么努力还挺有趣的。’他笑了笑。‘不过那也没用。结果还是一样的，而且永远都会一样。’”
Song Minwoo ducked just milliseconds before another punch made contact. He shoved Yoo Joonghyuk out of the way and brushed his hair back, the condescending glower still present. “Maybe it’s because it'd been a while but man, it sure was satisfying. You should’ve seen his face, the way Kim Psycho was practically begging us to stop—”
“宋敏宇在另一拳即将击中前的几毫秒躲开了。他把刘众赫推开，捋了捋头发，脸上依然带着轻蔑的怒容。‘可能是因为很久没这么做了，但说真的，那感觉太爽了。你真该看看他的脸，金疯子几乎是在求我们停手——’”
Like a beast that lost all sense of control, Yoo Joonghyuk leapt forward and trapped Song Minwoo onto the ground. He channeled all his strength into his right fist, pummeling Song Minwoo without giving him a chance to even gasp in pain.
“像一头失去所有理智的野兽，刘众赫猛地扑上前，将宋敏宇按倒在地。他将所有的力量集中在右拳上，狠狠地击打着宋敏宇，甚至不给他喘息的机会。”
“Hey, you—!!” Song Minwoo attempted to block another punch but the onslaught of attacks was too overpowering for him to defend himself. “What the fuck are you—” An agonizing scream was heard. “My ribs—wait, just, just wait a second!”
“嘿，你——！！” 宋敏宇试图挡住另一拳，但攻击的猛烈程度让他无法自卫。“你他妈在——” 一声痛苦的尖叫响起。“我的肋骨——等等，等一下！”
Yoo Joonghyuk paused, his arm bent and ready to strike once more. He seized Song Minwoo’s collar, which was now adorned with crimson droplets, and dragged him to a standing position.
刘众赫停了下来，手臂弯曲，准备再次出击。他抓住宋敏宇的衣领，衣领上已经沾满了鲜红的血滴，将他拖了起来。
“Earlier, you said you were getting payback.”
“刚才，你说你在报复。”
For the first time in his life, Song Minwoo trembled in fear as he perceived the murderous intent in his dilated pupils. Before he could blink, Yoo Joonghyuk simultaneously released his hold on his collar and struck his knee against his abdomen, eliciting a strangled groan. He tumbled to the ground, clutching his abdomen with his hands and gasping in pain. Yoo Joonghyuk gripped a chunk of his hair, yanking his head backward.
宋敏宇一生中第一次因恐惧而颤抖，他察觉到对方放大的瞳孔中透出的杀意。还没来得及眨眼，刘众赫同时松开了他的衣领，膝盖狠狠地撞向他的腹部，引发了一声窒息的呻吟。他倒在地上，双手捂着腹部，痛苦地喘息着。刘众赫抓住他的一撮头发，猛地将他的头向后拽去。
Song Minwoo’s lips dried as he noted the feral gaze directed at him.
宋敏宇注意到那狂野的目光正盯着他，嘴唇变得干涩。
“Consider this my payback, you fucker.”
“就当这是我还给你的，混蛋。”