1. 475085 - The One Where It All Began (第1季)【完整台词】

The One Where It All Began (Pilot) There's nothing to tell.
一切开始的地方 （飞行员） 没有什么可说的。

It's just some guy I work with.
这只是我一起工作的某个人。

You're going out with the guy.
你要和那个人出去 。

There has to be something wrong with him.
他一定有什么问题。

All right, Joey.  好的，乔伊。

Be nice.  友善点。

So does he have a hump and a hairpiece? Wait, does he eat chalk? I don't want her to go through what I did with Carl.
那么他有驼峰和假发吗？等等，他吃粉笔吗？我不想让她经历我对 Carl 所做的事。

Okay, everybody relax.  好了，大家放松。

This is not even a date.
这甚至不是一个日期。

It's just two people going out to dinner and not having sex.
只是两个人出去吃晚饭，没有做爱。

Sounds like a date to me.
对我来说听起来像是约会。

I'm in high school, in the cafeteria.
我在高中，在自助餐厅。

.

and I realize I'm totally naked.
我意识到我完全赤身裸体。

I've had that dream.
我有过那个梦想。

Then I look down and I realize there is a phone.
然后我低头一看，发现那里有一部电话。

.

there.  那里。

- Instead of - That's right! Never had that one.
- 而不是 - 没错！从来没有过。

All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring.
突然，电话响了起来。

What do I do? Everyone starts looking at me.
我该怎么办？每个人都开始看着我。

They weren't looking at you before? Finally, I figure I'd better answer it.
他们以前没有看你吗？最后，我想我最好回答这个问题。

And it turns out it's my mother.
结果发现是我妈妈。

Which is very, very weird because she never calls me.
这非常非常奇怪 ，因为她从不给我打电话。

Hi.  你好。

He says, "Hello," I want to kill myself.
他说，“你好，”我想自杀。

You okay? I feel like someone pulled my intestine out of my mouth.
你没事吧？我觉得有人把我的肠子从我的嘴里拉出来了。

.

- and tied it around my neck.
- 然后把它系在我的脖子上。

- Cookie? Carol moved her stuff out today.
-饼干？Carol 今天把她的东西搬出去了。

- Let me get you some coffee.
- 我给你拿点咖啡来。

- Thanks.  -谢谢。

No, don't! Stop cleansing my aura.
不，不要！停止净化我的光环 。

- Just leave my aura alone, okay? - Fine, be murky.
- 别管我的光环，好吗？- 好吧 ，模糊不清。

- I'll be fine.
- 我会没事的。

I hope she'll be happy.
我希望她会快乐。

- No, you don't.
- 不，你不需要。

No, I don't.  不，我没有。

To hell with her.
和她一起下地狱。

She left me! You never knew she was a lesbian? No! Okay? Why does everyone keep fixating on that? She didn't know.
她离开了我！你从来不知道她是个女同性恋吗？不！好？为什么每个人都一直关注这一点？她不知道。

How should I know? Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian.
我怎么知道？有时我希望我是一名女同性恋者。

Did I say that out loud? I told Mom and Dad last night.
我大声说出来了吗？昨晚我告诉了爸爸妈妈。

They took it pretty well.
他们接受得很好 。

Oh, really? So that hysterical phone call from a woman sobbing.
真的？所以那个女人歇斯底里地打来的电话，她抽泣着。

.

"I'll never have grandchildren," was what? A wrong number? Sorry.
“我永远不会有孙子孙女，”是什么？号码错误？不好意思。

Look, you're feeling a lot of pain right now.
你看，你现在感觉很痛苦。

You're angry.  你生气了。

You're hurting.  你受伤了。

Can I tell you what the answer is? Strip joints! Hey, you're single.
我能告诉你答案是什么吗？剥离接头！嘿，你是单身。

Have some hormones.  有一些激素。

But I don't want to be single, okay? I just want to be married again.
但我不想单身，好吗？我只想再婚。

And I just want a million dollars! - Rachel? - Oh, Monica! Thank God! I went to your building.
我只想要一百万美元！-瑞 秋？- 哦，莫妮卡！谢天谢地！我去了你的大楼。

.

and a guy with a hammer said you'd be here, and you are.
一个拿着锤子的家伙说你会在这里，你就在这儿。

- Can I get you some coffee? - Decaf.
- 我可以帮你喝杯咖啡吗？- 无咖啡因 。

Everybody, this is Rachel, a Lincoln High survivor.
大家，我是 Rachel，林肯高中幸存者。

This is everybody.  这是每个人。

Chandler and Phoebe.  钱德勒和菲比。

.

Joey.  乔伊。

Remember my brother, Ross? Sure! You want to tell us now, or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids? Well, it started about a half-hour before the wedding.
还记得我的兄弟 Ross 吗？确定！你现在就想告诉我们，还是我们在等待四个湿漉漉的伴娘 ？嗯，它开始于婚礼前大约半小时。

I was in the room with all the presents.
我当时在房间里，里面装满了所有的礼物。

.

and I was looking at this really gorgeous Limoges gravy boat.
我看着这艘非常华丽的利摩日肉汁船。

When all of a sudden Sweet 'N Low? I realized I was more turned on by this gravy boat than Barry.
突然之间，Sweet 'N Low？我意识到我对这艘肉汁船比 Barry 更感兴趣。

I got freaked out, and it hit me: How much Barry looks like Mr.
我吓坏了， 我突然想到：巴里长得多么像先生。

Potato Head.  土豆头。

I always knew he looked familiar, but.
我一直都知道他看起来很眼熟，但是。

.

I had to get out of there, and I started wondering.
我必须离开那里，我开始怀疑。

.

"Why am I doing this," and "Who am I doing it for?" I didn't know where to go, and I know we've drifted apart.
“”我为什么要做这个“和”我为谁做这个？我不知道该去哪里，我知道我们已经渐行渐远了。

.

but you're the only person I know here.
但你是我在这里唯一认识的人。

- Who wasn't invited to the wedding.
- 谁没有被邀请参加婚礼。

- I hoped that wouldn't be an issue.
- 我希望这不会成为问题。

I guess he bought her the pipe organ, and she's really not happy about it.
我猜他给她买了管风琴，她真的不高兴。

"Tuna or egg salad! Decide!" "I'll have whatever Christina's having.
“ 金枪鱼或鸡蛋沙拉！决定！“克里斯蒂娜有什么东西我就吃。

" Daddy, I just I can't marry him.
“爸爸，我就是嫁不下去他。”

I'm sorry.  对不起。

I just don't love him.
我就是不爱他。

Well, it matters to me! "If I let go of my hair, my head will fall off.
嗯，这对我来说很重要！“如果我松开我的头发，我的头就会掉下来。

" She should not be wearing those pants.
“她不应该穿那条裤子。

Push her down the stairs! Push her! Push her down the stairs! Come on, Daddy, listen! All my life, everyone's always told me, "You're a shoe!" "You're a shoe!" What if I don't want to be a shoe? What if I want to be a purse? Or a hat? No, I don't want you to buy me a hat! It's a metaphor, Daddy! You can see where he'd have trouble.
把她推下楼梯！推她！把她推下楼梯！来吧，爸爸，听着！在我的一生中，每个人都总是告诉我，“你是一双鞋！“你是一只鞋！”如果我不想成为鞋子怎么办？如果我想成为一个钱包怎么办？还是一顶帽子？不，我不要你给我买帽子！这是一个比喻，爸爸！你可以看到他哪里会遇到麻烦。

Look, Daddy, it's my life.
爸爸，看，这就是我的生活。

Well, maybe I'll just stay here with Monica.
好吧，也许我会和莫妮卡一起呆在这里。

I guess we've established she's staying with Monica.
我想我们已经确定她和莫妮卡在一起了。

Well, maybe that's my decision.
好吧，也许这是我的决定。

Maybe I don't need your money.
也许我不需要你的钱。

Wait! I said maybe! Just breathe.
等！我说也许吧！只是呼吸。

That's it.  就是这样。

Try to think of nice, calm things.
试着想想美好、平静的事情。

Raindrops on roses And whiskers on kittens Doorbells and sleigh bells And something with mittens La la la something And noodles with string I'm all better now.
玫瑰上的雨滴 和小猫身上的胡须 门铃和雪橇铃 和带手套的东西 啦啦啦的东西 和带绳子的面条 我现在都好多了。

I helped.  我帮忙。

This is probably for the best.
这可能是最好的。

Independence.  独立。

Controlling your life.  掌控你的生活。

The whole hat thing.
整顶帽子的事情。

You can always come to Joey.
你随时可以来找乔伊。