1、The party was in full swing now, hosted in the overly expensive lawn of Alpha Zade of Shadow Moon Pack. I glanced around, noticing with confusion that a few of the people present were humans while some smelled like wi*ches and I wondered how vast this Alpha must be to be able to pull something like this off, but I kept mute.
1、派对现在正在如火如荼地进行，在暗影之月包的 Alpha Zade 过于昂贵的草坪上举办。我环顾四周，困惑地注意到在场的一些人是人类，而有些人闻起来像 wi*ches，我想知道这个 Alpha 必须有多大才能完成这样的事情，但我一直保持沉默。

I wasn’t here to ogle at his wealth. I was here for something else entirely.
我不是来这里炫耀他的财富的。我来这里完全是为了其他事情。

Ignoring the itch from my wig, I observed. I had taken great care and spent a lot of money to look like someone else tonight. The long brown dress with a deep neckline hugged my petite body perfectly but it did well to hide the kni*es strapped to my thighs and hips expertly, one of which had twisted. I had also picked one or two items to accentuate my dress, most of which were weapo*s on their own, like my knuckle rings which had small silver-laced spikes protruding from the front and my rhinestone Chinese hair stick that I didn’t intend to use but would use if everything got dirty; they were dangerous but fashionable to anyone who would see them. And now, I just waited for the evening to play out. I had been planning this night for days, relying on this plan to work. I couldn’t screw up now when I am already so close, or chicken out… even as my hands trembled. My father would literally mu*der me.
我无视假发上的痒，观察着。我非常小心，花了很多钱今晚看起来像别人。那件深领口的棕色长裙完美地拥抱了我娇小的身体，但它巧妙地隐藏了绑在我大腿和臀部上的刀，其中一个已经扭曲了。我还挑选了一两件物品来突出我的衣服，其中大部分本身就是 weapo*s，比如我的指节环，前面有突出的银色小钉子和我的水钻中国发棒，我不打算使用，但如果所有东西都脏了就会用;它们很危险，但对任何看到它们的人来说都很时髦。而现在，我只是等待夜晚的到来。我已经计划了好几天的这个夜晚，依靠这个计划来工作。我已经离得这么近了，我现在不能搞砸，或者退缩......即使我的手在颤抖。我爸爸真的会把我弄脏。

As the wind blew with abandon, I caught sight of a beautiful man standing aloof at the front of the crowd with a glass of champagne in his hands which he refused to sip from. There were people crowding around him but from here, I could see how unimpressed and uninterested he was with them.
当风吹拂时，我看到一个美丽的男人冷漠地站在人群前面，手里拿着一杯香槟，他拒绝啜饮。他周围挤满了人，但从这里，我可以看到他对他们有多么不为所动，也不感兴趣。

He stood tall, in a casual three-piece Armani gray suit sans the tie. His dark hair was almost competing with the night sky and it was so long, it fell to his shoulders in a way that it looked wild but not untamed. If that was even possible.
他站得笔直，穿着休闲的三件套阿玛尼灰色西装，没有打领带。他的黑发几乎与夜空相抗衡，而且是如此之长，垂到他的肩膀上，看起来狂野但并非野蛮。如果这是可能的。

I couldn’t see his eyes from here but I knew they were gray. A striking gray with gold rimming. I’d seen pictures of him. Read stories of his brutalit* and took my time these past few days to really look into him. While his muscular frame was attractive, it wasn’t the reason I couldn’t look away. It was because of the stories I’d heard about him in the last few weeks, mostly from eavesdropping on conversations, especially my father’s.
我从这里看不到他的眼睛，但我知道那是灰色的。醒目的灰色，带有金色镶边。我看过他的照片。阅读他残忍的故事*，并在过去几天花时间真正了解他。虽然他肌肉发达的身材很吸引人，但这并不是我无法移开视线的原因。这是因为我在过去几周里听到了关于他的故事，大部分是通过偷听谈话，尤其是我父亲的谈话。

Alpha Zade ‘The motherfucking’ Caine.
Alpha Zade 'The motherfucking' 凯恩。

They called him the exterminator. His dark reputation precedes him. He rarely went after anyone but when he did, it was over. When he did, he went straight for their heads. No distractions. No playing around. I sighed, shifting as I discreetly tried to balance the blad* in a way that was less painful. I failed.
他们称他为灭绝者。他的黑暗名声在他之前。他很少去追究任何人，但当他这样做时，一切都结束了。当他这样做时，他直奔他们的头。没有干扰。不要玩弄。我叹了口气，小心翼翼地试图以一种不那么痛苦的方式平衡 blad*。我失败了。

He was also the reason I was here.
他也是我在这里的原因。

I was going to kil* the Exterminator.
我本来打算杀掉灭绝者。

Finally, after exchanging pleasantries with some dignitaries, Alpha Zade moved towards the house and immediately, my heart began to pound in my chest.
最后，在与一些政要寒暄之后，Alpha Zade 向房子走去，我的心立刻开始在胸口砰砰直跳。

“Showtime.”
“表演时间。”

Sticking to the shadows, I followed him all the way into the house, my choice of dark colors had specifically been for this reason. Not to stand out. To remain in the shadows. A few steps into the path and I began to feel my heart thumping in my chest. It felt like a trap… like he knew I was here and was intentionally leading me to my deat*, and I followed. The party was fast disappearing behind me, even the music was becoming inaudible from here but I forged ahead.
我跟着阴影一路走进了房子，我选择深色就是为了这个原因。不要脱颖而出。留在阴影中。走进小路几步，我开始感到我的心在胸口砰砰直跳。感觉就像一个陷阱......就像他知道我在这里，故意带我去我的院长*，我就跟着去了。派对在我身后迅速消失，甚至从这里开始音乐也变得听不见，但我继续前进。

Up ahead, I saw Alpha Zade’s tall, broad back striding agilely into the house and in turn, I rushed on my heels, desperate not to lose him.
在前方，我看到 Alpha Zade 高大宽阔的背影敏捷地大步走进房子，反过来，我紧随其后，不顾一切地不想失去他。

Frowning at the lack of security around the house itself, I slipped into the house gasping when suddenly, I noticed a bodyguard headed in my direction.
我因房子周围缺乏安全保障而皱眉，喘着粗气溜进屋子，突然，我注意到一名保镖朝我的方向走来。

Adrenaline. It was the only thing I felt rushing through my veins even after my blo*d had long stopped pumping. I ducked behind the first pillar I saw and nearly groaned when I caught sight of Alpha Zade disappearing to the right side of the too beautiful lobby.
肾上腺素。这是我唯一感觉到的东西在我的血管中奔涌，即使我的男朋友早已停止抽动。我躲在我看到的第一根柱子后面，当我看到 Alpha Zade 消失在太漂亮的大厅右侧时，我几乎要呻吟了。

I gritted my teeth in annoyance when I felt something wrap itself around my upper arm. It felt like a vice and the force it exerted had me spinning on my heels. My eyes widened when I came face to face with the guard but what surprised me the most was the fact that he was human. He was big… very big, but was still human.
当我感觉到有什么东西缠住了我的上臂时，我恼火地咬紧牙关。感觉就像一个虎钳，它施加的力量让我脚后跟旋转。当我与警卫面对面时，我睁大了眼睛，但最让我惊讶的是他竟然是人类。他很大......非常大，但仍然是人类。

“Hi,” I breathed out,
“嗨，”我呼出一口气，

“Hi,” he replied, rather skeptically. “Are you lost ma’am?” He asked, his eyes suspicious and before I could rethink my actions, I pulled out my handkerchief, the one laced with tranquilize* and pressed it against his face.I stole a glance around the now quiet place before I helped him to the floor, leaving him there where I expected him to nap for the remaining hours of the party.
“嗨，”他回答，颇为怀疑。“你迷路了吗，马？”他问道，眼神中带着怀疑，在我重新考虑我的行动之前，我掏出了我的手帕，那条沾有镇静剂*的手帕，贴在他的脸上。我偷偷地环顾了一下现在安静的地方，然后把他扶到地板上，把他留在那儿，我以为他会在派对的剩余时间里小睡一会儿。

“Shi*! Shi*!”
“石*！嘿*！

That was the sloppiest, sloppy encounter I have ever had in my life!
那是我这辈子遇到过的最草率、最草率的遭遇！

Deciding not to dwell too much on how wrong that had been, I made my way upstairs, following in Alpha Zade’s tail. Funny enough, he was no longer in these places but I could smell him, and a little undertone of something that I couldn’t name but was divine all the same.
决定不去过多地纠结那件事有多错误，我跟着Alpha Zade的尾巴上楼。有趣的是，他已经不在这些地方了，但我能闻到他的味道，还有一点我无法说出名字但同样神圣的东西的暗示。

Once inside, I made a run for it, only stopping to pick my heels in my hands to avoid making any noise. Within seconds, I was standing in front of a large door, one whose decorations alone screamed royalty. Taking a deep breath, I pulled two kni*es from underneath my dress, reached for the knob and then turned it open.
一进去，我就跑了起来，只是停下来用手捡我的高跟鞋，以免发出任何声音。几秒钟后，我就站在了一扇大门前，光是它的装饰就让人尖叫着皇室。深吸一口气，我从裙子下面抽出两把刀，伸手去拿把手，然后把它打开。

And stepped inside.
然后走了进去。

The atmosphere immediately shifted and so did my landing. Eyes wide, ears perked, I glanced around the empty room, angry that I had followed my instincts to the wrong place.
气氛立即发生了变化，我的着陆也发生了变化。我睁大了眼睛，竖起了耳朵，环顾了一下空荡荡的房间，为我跟随自己的直觉来到了错误的地方而生气。

Shi*!
石*！

The door on the other side of the large room opened before I even had a chance to take in my surroundings and with my heart hammering, I crouched in the corner, seeing Alpha Zade step out of the bathroom, throwing his suit jacket on the bed. I watched him quietly, I hated myself for noticing, I couldn’t deny that he was quite an eye candy. A large eye candy at that.
大房间另一边的门在我甚至有机会观察周围的环境之前就打开了，我心跳加速，蹲在角落里，看到 Alpha Zade 从浴室里走出来，把他的西装外套扔在床上。我静静地看着他，我讨厌自己注意到了，我不能否认他是一个相当吸引眼球的人。这真是个大赏心。

I watched him turn in the direction of the window, taking his phone out of his pocket as he scrolled through it. His face was contorted into a frown as his concentration was entirely on the object. Watching how focused he was, I straightened myself in the shadows.
我看着他转向窗户的方向，从口袋里掏出手机，翻阅着手机。他的脸扭曲成皱眉，因为他的注意力完全集中在那个物体上。看着他如此专注，我在阴影中挺直了身体。

It was now or never.
要么现在，要么永远。

This stupid thought was what guided me, and with slightly trembling hands, I inched forward as quietly as I could. I even refrained from breathing because somehow, I feared that it would alert him. A few steps away from him, I planted the blad* on his back and with the most icy voice I could muster, I whispered;
这个愚蠢的想法引导着我，我用微微颤抖的手，尽可能安静地向前移动。我什至克制住了呼吸，因为不知何故，我担心它会提醒他。离他几步远的地方，我把那块石头*放在他的背上，用我能鼓起的最冰冷的声音，低声说;

“Don’t move.”
“别动。”

I saw how his entire body stiffened infinitesimally and a cold dread washed over me. My hands trembled ever so slightly before I clamped down on my fear, forcing the blad* to remain erect against his body.
我看到他的整个身体无限地僵硬，一股冰冷的恐惧冲刷着我。我的手微微颤抖着，然后我压制住了我的恐惧，迫使那个 blad* 在他的身体上保持勃起。

“Interesting,” he remarked in a voice that sent chills down my spine. No one told me he sounded so… beautiful. So scary. Just the perfect depiction of how the devil would have sounded had he been a man.
“有意思，”他的声音让我脊背发凉。没有人告诉我他听起来那么......美丽。太可怕了。只是完美地描绘了如果魔鬼是个男人，他会是什么声音。

“Drop your phone and raise your hands,” I ordered, watching him comply without hesitation.
“放下你的手机，举起你的手，”我命令道，看着他毫不犹豫地服从。

I closed my eyes, this was the perfect time, the perfect opportunity to do it. I steadied my hands and just as I was about to press the blad* into his skin, I heard a loud noise coming from outside his room. I should never have been interested but I was so scared. I was so scared that his bodyguards had come for me.
我闭上眼睛，这是完美的时机，完美的机会。我稳住了手，正当我准备把 blad* 压进他的皮肤时，我听到他的房间外面传来一声巨响。我本来不应该感兴趣，但我太害怕了。我太害怕了，他的保镖来找我了。

My greatest regret was that I turned in the direction of the noise and in that split second of my distraction, nem*sis caught up with me.
我最大的遗憾是我转向噪音的方向，就在我分心的那一瞬间，nem*sis 追上了我。

My back was slammed into the wall beside me, and my right hand, the one that had been holding the knif*, was restrained by a tight grip. He twisted my hand almost painfully, bringing the knif* up to my throat, but it was still in my hands.
我的后背撞在旁边的墙上，我的右手，也就是一直握着刀*的那只手，被紧紧地抓住了。他几乎痛苦地扭动着我的手，把刀*举到我的喉咙上，但它仍然在我手里。

I blinked up at him, at his eyes- his very gray, almost black eyes that now swirled with enough fury to start world war three. I was stunned beyond my mind and most of all, I felt stupid, very stupid for thinking that I could take on an Alpha myself. Father be dam*ed.
我朝他眨了眨眼，看着他的眼睛——他那双灰暗的、几乎是黑色的眼睛，现在旋转着足以引发第三次世界大战的愤怒。我惊呆了，最重要的是，我觉得自己很愚蠢，非常愚蠢，因为我以为我自己可以挑战 Alpha。父亲。

I gulped. The blade of my knif* clutched in my hands was gripped by his and was right against my neck. I felt the cool metal against my porcelain skin… I felt the silver in it b*ting into my flesh. His other hand, large and calloused, was holding my other hand above my head, rendering me completely immobile but that was the least of my problems.
我咽了口口水。我手里紧紧握着的刀刃被他紧紧抓住，正好抵在我的脖子上。我感觉到冰凉的金属贴在我的瓷质皮肤上......我感觉到里面的银色在我的肉里咔嚓作响。他的另一只手，又大又老茧，把我的另一只手举过头顶，使我完全无法动弹，但这是我最不重要的问题。

My problem was the fact that I would di* soon from the hands of the first man my father had ever asked me to kil*. My problem was that judging from the crazy sparks sprouting from everywhere our bodies touched, threatening to drown me, that I would be kil*ed by my mate.
我的问题是，我很快就会从我父亲要求我杀害的第一个男人的手中死去。我的问题是，从我们的身体接触的地方冒出的疯狂火花来看，我有可能被我的伴侣杀死。

My mate.
我的朋友。

For several years after my eighteenth birthday, I had sought my mate and I was shattered when day after day, I never found him. I had even begun to be accustomed with the fact that I would never have one until today.
在我 18 岁生日后的几年里，我一直在寻找我的伴侣，但日复一日，我没有找到他，这让我心碎。我什至开始习惯了这样一个事实，即直到今天我才拥有它。

Alpha Zade, the Exterminator, was my mate.
Alpha Zade，灭绝者，是我的伙伴。

Swallowing, I looked up at him, whilst avoiding his blazing eyes and straightened my spine. If I was going to di*, I wouldn’t die like a coward, especially not in his hands.
我咽了口口水，抬头看着他，同时避开了他炽热的眼睛，挺直了我的脊椎。如果我要死*，我不会像个懦夫一样死去，尤其是不会死在他的手里。

Just then, he leaned even closer. His face was only a few inches from mine and his eyes were cold as he asked;
就在这时，他靠得更近了。他的脸离我只有几英寸，当他问时，他的眼睛是冰冷的;

“Who sent you?”
“谁派你来的？”

His voice had been so cold, so quiet that I felt a new type of dread wash over me. It was obvious he knew that we were mates. I could swear that I felt his body tremble over mine but his voice had been so collected, so undisturbed that I was certain he didn’t care. He would kil* me just like anyone else. Mate bond be dam*ed.
他的声音是如此冰冷，如此安静，以至于我感到一种新的恐惧涌上心头。很明显，他知道我们是伙伴。我可以发誓，我感觉到他的身体在我的身体上颤抖，但他的声音是如此镇定，如此不受干扰，以至于我确信他并不在乎。他会像其他人一样杀害我。Mate bond。

“Speak, love. Before I bury this silver rimmed blad* into somewhere you would never heal from.” He whispered in my face. Despite his threatening words and blazing eyes, his voice didn’t rise or fall. He wasn’t yelling or whispering, he just sounded… threatening.
“说吧，爱。在我把这个银边的 blad* 埋在你永远无法治愈的地方之前。他在我面前低声说。尽管他有威胁的话语和炽热的眼睛，他的声音并没有起伏。他没有大喊大叫或耳语，他只是听起来......威胁。

My stomach churned but I gnashed my teeth, refusing to show fear or be intimidated, silently listening as he moved the knif* to my pulse and pressed it in. “This spot, if I st*b you here, you’ll d*e but you’ll ble*d messy. I don’t like messes.”
我的胃翻腾着，但我咬牙切齿，拒绝表现出恐惧或被吓倒，默默地听着他将刀*移到我的脉搏上并把它压进去。“这个地方，如果我把你放在这儿，你会死的，但你会流血的。我不喜欢乱七八糟。

My heart thundered in my chest while I watched him. His voice was taunting, almost seductive with the promise of de*th hanging in every word he spoke.
当我看着他时，我的心在胸口轰鸣。他的声音带着嘲讽，几乎是诱人的，他所说的每一个字都带着 de*th 的承诺。

“Now say who brought you here before I forget about my hatred for messes.”
“现在说说是谁把你带到这儿的，以免我忘记我对混乱的憎恨。”

“I brought myself,” I quickly replied, noticing how his eyes widened before landing on my face… and then my neck. Burning holes into my pulse. I didn’t know whether he wanted to sink his fangs into that spot… or the knif* still clutched painfully in my hand, the hand that was in his grip because hell, I wanted to sink my teeth in him… and definitely not in a way that would kil* him.
“我自己来了，”我迅速回答，注意到他的眼睛睁大了，然后落在我的脸上......然后是我的脖子。我的脉搏上灼热着。我不知道他是否想把他的獠牙那个地方......或者那把刀*仍然痛苦地紧紧地握在我的手里，那只手紧紧地握着他，因为见鬼，我想把我的牙齿咬进他......而且绝对不会以一种会杀死他的方式。

“And what is your name?”
“那你叫什么名字？”

“Hazel.” I murmured, shaking as the blad* had broken skin and was about to go deeper into my flesh.
“榛子。”我喃喃自语着，因为那块血气*已经破损了皮肤，正要深入我的肉体。

I saw his eyes widen for the briefest of seconds, felt his body go completely still before his gaze landed on my eyes. He watched them quietly, regarding me with an intensity that no one has ever done before. He spoke suddenly and at first, I didn’t hear what he said because I had been so scared, so distracted that the only thing I heard was the sound of my blo*d in my ears.
我看到他睁大了眼睛几秒钟，感觉他的身体完全静止了，然后他的目光落在我的眼睛上。他静静地看着他们，以前所未有的强烈看着我。他突然说话，起初，我没有听到他说什么，因为我太害怕了，太分心了，我唯一听到的就是我耳边的发声。

“Go.” His voice came again and this time, my eyes widened when I noticed that he had taken considerable steps away from me with both of my kni*es in his hands.
“走。”他的声音又来了，这一次，当我注意到他手里拿着我的两把刀，离我走了好几步时，我睁大了眼睛。

I wetted my dry lips and whispered; “…thank you.” But Alpha Zade shook his head immediately, dismissing me.
我弄湿了干燥的嘴唇，低声说;“…谢谢你。但 Alpha Zade 立即摇了摇头，不理会我。

“Don’t thank me and do not think I am letting you go from the goodness of my heart. You owe me one now, sugar, and for the rest of your life, I’ll remind you… until you repay me.”
“不要感谢我，也不要以为我让你离开了我心中的善良。你现在欠我一个，糖，在你的余生中，我会提醒你......直到你报答我。

His voice, coupled with the electrifying sensations coursing through my body and the way his eyes openly roamed my skin made my words stuck in my throat. I could only nod once and without looking back, I fled.
他的声音，加上我全身流淌的电击感，以及他的眼睛在我的皮肤上自由漫游的方式，使我的话卡在了喉咙里。我只能点头，头也不回地逃走了。

2、Anger and frustration coursed through me but just as I was about to walk to the door, to step out of the room, someone knocked on it.
2、愤怒和沮丧在我心中蔓延，但就在我准备走到门口，走出房间时，有人敲了敲门。

“Come in!” I barked, and just then, Ian, my Beta stepped in. While he had an unruffled attitude, the man was well known for being very disorganized in person. His sandy blonde hair cascaded down his head like a tornado and his beards which were a little overgrown framed his face like a broken mopstick. Looking at it, I had to bite back the urge to comment on it.
“进来！”我吠叫着，就在这时，Ian，我的 Beta 走了进来。虽然他的态度不慌不忙，但众所周知，这个人在人处时非常杂乱无章。他沙色的金发像龙卷风一样从头上垂下来，他的胡须有点杂草，像一根折断的拖把一样框住了他的脸。看着它，我不得不忍住想评论它的冲动。

“What is it?” I asked instead and after pointing a look in Sheila’s direction, he turned to me;
“什么事？”我反而问道，在看了一眼 Sheila 的方向后，他转向我;

“In your absence, we caught a rogue girl trying to sneak into the pack. She looked beaten up and dirty and had passed out so we took her to one of the new cells in the dungeon.” He said.
“趁你不在的时候，我们抓到了一个试图偷偷溜进狼群的流氓女孩。她看起来浑身脏兮兮的，已经昏倒了，所以我们带她去了地牢里的一个新牢房。他说。

Truthfully, I wasn’t interested in any girl. I wasn’t interested in anyone who had tried to sneak into my pack but had fainted halfway through it. However, I wanted to escape Sheila and her tantrums. I didn’t want to be anywhere around her anymore so I nodded;
说实话，我对任何女孩都不感兴趣。我对任何试图偷偷溜进我的背包但中途晕倒的人不感兴趣。然而，我想逃避希拉和她的发脾气。我不想再出现在她身边的任何地方，所以我点了点头;

“Okay, I want to see her.”
“好吧，我想见她。”

I heard Sheila gasp from behind me but I didn’t acknowledge her weak attempt at protesting against me. I didn’t even spare her a glance as I stepped out of the room and began to walk in the direction leading to the dunge*n. While we went, Ian remained quiet beside me and I was thankful for that because right now, the last thing I wanted was a conversation.
我听到希拉在我身后喘息，但我没有承认她对我的无力抗议。我甚至没有看她一眼，就走出了房间，开始朝着通往地牢的方向走去。我们走的时候，伊恩在我身边保持安静，我很感激，因为现在，我最不想做的就是一次对话。

We had only just stepped into the clearing leading to the dunge*n gates when suddenly, the smell hit me. It was the most beautiful smell I had ever perceived in my entire life. It smelled of dew in the morning, some fruity syrup, and… Lavender. My Lavender. My eyes widened when the realization hit me and increasing my pace, I rushed into the cell Ian had described earlier, gasping when I saw Hazel sprawled on the floor with most of her hair covering her face.
我们才刚踏入通往地牢门的空地，突然，一股气味袭来。这是我这辈子见过的最美的气味。早上闻起来有露水的味道，一些果味糖浆，还有......薰衣草。我的薰衣草。当意识到这一点时，我睁大了眼睛，加快了我的步伐，我冲进了伊恩之前描述的牢房，当我看到 Hazel 躺在地板上，大部分头发都遮住了她的脸时，我喘不过气来。

Thank the goddess that she was not chained with one of those shiver chains because I might’ve lost it. I sighed as I rubbed my face again.
感谢女神，她没有被那些颤抖的锁链锁住，因为我可能已经丢失了它。我叹了口气，再次揉了揉自己的脸。

“Hazel?” My voice was low and soft, so soft that I had to clear my throat. A few of the guards present had turned to look at me, equally shocked by how softly I had spoken to the prisoner, and as soon as Hazel heard her name, she stirred awake. Slowly, she raised her head and I was hit again, enthralled all over again by how beautiful she was. My breath caught in my throat. I coughed;
“黑泽尔？”我的声音低沉而柔和，轻柔到我不得不清清嗓子。在场的几个警卫转过头来看我，同样对我和囚犯说话的轻声细语感到震惊，Hazel 一听到她的名字，就醒了过来。慢慢地，她抬起头来，我又被击中了，再次被她的美丽所吸引。我的呼吸卡在了喉咙里。我咳嗽起来;

“What are you doing here?”
“你在这里做什么？”

I noticed how her eyes widened for a nanosecond upon seeing me before she looked away. I saw her lips tremble, could see some of her pale skin peeking out from the sack she wore as a cloth… and worst of all, I could see the ga*hes, the c*ts, and the br*ses lining up that porcelain skin of hers. My blo*d boiled.
我注意到她在看到我时睁大了眼睛一纳秒，然后又把目光移开了。我看到她的嘴唇颤抖着，可以看到她一些苍白的皮肤从她作为布料的袋子里探出头来......最糟糕的是，我可以看到 ga*hes、c*ts 和 br*ses 排列在她的瓷质皮肤上。我的朋友沸腾了。

“Who did this to you?”
“谁对你做了这件事？”

She sobbed; “my father.”
她啜泣着;“我爸爸。”

I had always hated that man. That was a known fact, but today, after seeing what he’s done to Hazel, his daughter, my mate, I despised him even more. Anger like never before made me see red. I squeezed my hands into tight fists to stop myself from letting it out. I couldn’t let anyone see me like this, like a beast, let alone an almost broken Hazel.
我一直很讨厌那个男人。这是众所周知的事实，但今天，在看到他对 Hazel、他的女儿、我的伴侣所做的一切后，我更加鄙视他了。前所未有的愤怒让我脸红。我把双手紧紧握成拳头，阻止自己把它发泄出来。我不能让任何人看到我这样，像一头野兽，更不用说一个几乎坏掉的 Hazel。

After several minutes of trying to calm my raging heartbeat, I went over to where she sat, squatted in front of her, and murmured; “Why? Why did he hit you this much?”
在试图平息我愤怒的心跳几分钟后，我走到她坐的地方，蹲在她面前，喃喃自语;“为什么？他为什么这么打你？

For a minute, I saw her open her mouth as if to speak but then, those beautiful eyes of hers flashed with their usual stubbornness before she clamped her mouth shut.
有那么一分钟，我看到她张开嘴，似乎要说话，但随后，她那双美丽的眼睛闪过了一贯的倔强，然后她闭上了嘴。

“Why?” I pried again,
“为什么？”我再次撬开，

“It’s none of your business!” She answered, ever so defiant.
“这不关你的事！”她回答，一丝挑衅。

I almost chuckled at her stubbornness but I couldn’t. Not when she was obviously hurting, not when she looked like she was about to burst into tears any moment from now. So instead of laughing, I held her by the back of her neck and pulled her face close to mine, so close that I could smell the bad breath on her, possibly as a result of improper oral hygiene the past few days that she had been locked in here.
我差点被她的固执逗笑，但我不能。不是当她明显受伤的时候，不是当她看起来随时都要哭泣的时候。所以我没有笑，而是搂着她的后颈，把她的脸贴近我的脸，靠得如此之近，以至于我能闻到她身上的口臭，可能是由于她被锁在这里的几天里口腔卫生不当。

“I don’t know why you’re protecting that prick and frankly, I do not care,” I started saying, using the iciest voice I could muster. “All I care about right now is the fact that you are in my pack and that you smell like a rogue.”
“我不知道你为什么要保护那个刺，坦率地说，我不在乎，”我开始说，用我能鼓起的最冷酷的声音。“我现在只在乎你在我的背包里，而且你闻起来像个流氓。”

Hazel gasped. Her eyes were as round as saucers when she took in my last words and I couldn’t help but notice how he bent her head to take a sniff at herself. Da*n this thing, I only said that because Ian had mentioned it earlier. I couldn’t even smell a thing on her either, besides her wonderful Lavender scent and I was sure that it had something to do with the mate bond and my unhealthy obsession for her.
黑泽尔倒抽了一口气。当她听到我的最后一句话时，她的眼睛像碟子一样圆，我不禁注意到他是如何低下头嗅自己的。的这件事，我这么说只是因为伊恩之前提到过。除了她美妙的薰衣草香味外，我什至在她身上也闻不到任何东西，我确信这与伴侣关系和我对她的不健康痴迷有关。

“Oh,” she breathed out, “see, please just let me go. I promise to not return here. I didn’t even know I was in your pack and I am sorry.” She continued.
“哦，”她呼出一口气，“看，请放过我。我保证不会再回到这里了。我什至不知道我在你的队伍里，我很抱歉。她继续说道。

I noticed how she had evaded my questions and instead of answering them, she had begged to be let out instead and it made me mad. Very mad.
我注意到她是如何回避我的问题，而不是回答它们，而是乞求被放出来，这让我很生气。非常生气。

“No,” I pointed out, sounding cold, “…so it’s either you tell me why your father be*t you to a pulp and drove you out of his pack or I would be forced to take you back to him.”
“不，”我指出，听起来很冷，“......所以，要么你告诉我为什么你爸爸不把你赶出去，然后把你从他的背包里赶出去，要么我就被迫把你带回他身边。

Hazel let out a shaky breath. “He beat me up because I refused to ki*l someone…” she stuttered.
Hazel 颤抖地呼出一口气。“他打我，因为我拒绝杀人......”她结结巴巴地说。

Deep down, I instantly knew that that ‘someone’ was me but I didn’t bother to ask her that. I felt guilty; guilty because she’d been treated this way because of me and I was angry too, angry because I had let it happen and because I wasn’t able to protect her from a monster like him.
在内心深处，我立刻知道那个 “某人 ”就是我，但我懒得问她。我感到内疚;内疚是因为她因为我而受到这样的对待，我也很生气，因为我让它发生了，因为我无法保护她免受像他这样的怪物的伤害。

“So now that you are in my pack, would you decide to stay here… with us or should we let you out, back into the wild where anyone and anything can ha*m you?” I asked, choosing my words so carefully, in such a way that she would be forced to stay back.
“所以现在你在我的背包里，你会决定留在这里吗......跟我们一起，还是让我们让你出去，回到任何人和任何东西都可以骚扰你的野外？我问道，小心翼翼地选择我的措辞，以至于她不得不退后一步。

She remained mute.
她仍然保持沉默。

“Hazel, do not make me ask again, will you stay here or do you want to leave? Whatever you say is what I would do,” I thre*tened, noticing how her eyes widened before they fell on the plate of untouched food on the floor.
“榛子，别让我再问了，你会留在这里还是想走？无论你说什么，我都会怎么做，“我咕哝着，注意到她的眼睛在落在地板上那盘未动过的食物上之前是如何睁大的。

“I will stay,” she whispered so softly that I almost thought I didn’t hear her clearly in the first place.
“我会留下来，”她轻声说，以至于我几乎以为我一开始就没有听清楚她的话。

A smile threatened to spl*t my face in half but I reigned it in, pinning her with my most fierce look. “You know now, Sugar, that staying here has its perks. I’ll give you a home in exchange for something.”
一个笑容几乎要把我的脸撕成两半，但我控制住了它，用我最凶狠的眼神固定住了她。“你现在知道了，糖，留在这里有它的好处。我会给你一个家来换取一些东西。

When I said that, she turned her head away but that was not before I saw the conflicting emotions in her eyes, her fear and her paranoia. She murmured; “And what would that be?”
当我说这句话时，她把头转开了，但就在那之前，我看到了她眼中矛盾的情绪，她的恐惧和偏执。她喃喃自语;“那会是什么？”

The fact that despite everything she had been put through, she could still sound so strong made me respect her even more. I beamed a small smile at her as I said; “The CCTV footage that your father and his boys had so viol*ntly destr*yed last week. Am I clear?”
尽管她经历了一切，但她的声音仍然如此强大，这一事实让我更加尊重她。我一边说，一边向她微微一笑;“你爸爸和他的儿子们上周被如此严重破坏的闭路电视录像。我清楚吗？

She didn’t answer. She didn’t even move.
她没有回答。她甚至没有动。

“Hazel baby, am I clear?” I asked again and this time she nodded, making me smile for a moment before I immediately caught myself and frowned.
“榛子宝贝，我清楚吗？”我又问了一遍，这次她点了点头，让我笑了一会儿，然后我立即发现自己并皱起了眉头。

Da*n it. She would ruin my reputation and it annoyed me to no end that she had this much power over me!
的。她会毁了我的名声，她对我有这么大的权力，这让我无比恼火！

3、

My eyes widened and nearly bulged out of its sockets when two burly soldiers came to stand by my sides. They looped their arms with mine and after securing me firmly between them, began to stomp out of my room.
我睁大了眼睛，几乎要从眼眶里鼓出来，这时两个魁梧的士兵站在我身边。他们用我的胳膊环住我的胳膊，把我牢牢地夹在中间，然后开始跺着脚走出我的房间。

I had been too shocked earlier, so stunned that I had been unable to speak but when they began to drag me out of the room like I was nothing but a sack of potatoes, my fight or flight skill kicked in. I screamed, thrashing in their hold.
我刚才太震惊了，震惊得说不出话来，但当他们开始把我拖出房间，就像我只是一袋土豆一样时，我的战斗或逃跑技巧就开始发挥作用了。我尖叫着，在他们的怀抱中抽打着。

“What the HELL is THIS?!” I bellowed, feeling my anger override the initial fear I felt. “Why would you come into my personal space?!” I raged on but none of them said anything. They didn’t even act like I existed.
“这是什么？！”我咆哮着，感觉我的愤怒压倒了我最初的恐惧。“你为什么要进入我的个人空间？！”我继续生气，但他们都没有说什么。他们甚至没有表现得像我存在一样。

When they made a move to drag me out of the room, I dug the back of my heels into the floor and snarled; “I am not moving an inch until you tell me what is happening!”
当他们想把我拖出房间时，我把脚后跟挖进地板里，咆哮着;“在你告诉我发生了什么之前，我不会移动一寸！”

One of them, the one with the matted red hair and had the name ‘Al’ written on his uniform, stopped to regard me with the stinkiest death glare I have ever seen in my life. He spat; “The Alpha asked us to bring you.”
其中一个人，那个留着乱七八糟的红发，制服上写着“Al”名字的那个，停下来，用我这辈子见过的最臭的死亡目光看着我。他啐了一口;“Alpha 让我们带你来。”

Oh, so the Alpha sent them?
哦，所以 Alpha 派他们来的？

The knowledge that these people were only acting out on Zade’s orders made me mad. And hurt. Extremely hurt. Tears welled up in my eyes as the two soldiers whose arms were still interlocked with mine continued to drag me away while the others walked ahead of us with most of my gadgets in their hands. I wondered what they needed those for but deciding not to worry about that…yet, I turned my face away.
知道这些人只是按照 Zade 的命令行事，这让我很生气。而且受伤了。极度受伤。当两个胳膊仍然与我的手臂相连的士兵继续拖着我离开时，我的眼泪在眼眶里涌出，而其他人则走在我们前面，手里拿着我的大部分小玩意。我想知道他们需要这些来做什么，但决定不担心......然而，我把脸转开了。

Blinking away the tears in my eyes, I asked them; “What’s happening?” But none of them responded. If anything, they pretended not to hear me and that was my cue to shut up.
我眨了眨眼，擦去眼中的泪水，问他们;“怎么回事？”但他们都没有回应。如果有的话，他们假装没听到我的话，这就是我闭嘴的暗示。

I let them drag me away while I followed obediently like a lamb being led to slaughter until we arrived at a large room downstairs. And to my surprise, it was packed with some members of Zade’s pack. I could remember some faces from the meeting earlier today and even Zade’s half brother, Tristan, was present, but Zade was nowhere to be found. The soldiers that had been holding me then pushed me to the middle of the room but they didn’t step away from me, as if to ensure that I couldn’t escape. Not that I would.
我让他们拖着我走，而我则像一只被牵着去宰杀的羔羊一样顺从地跟着，直到我们来到楼下的一个大房间。令我惊讶的是，里面挤满了 Zade 的一些成员。我记得今天早些时候会议中的一些面孔，甚至 Zade 同父异母的兄弟 Tristan 也在场，但 Zade 无处可寻。一直抱着我的士兵然后把我推到房间中间，但他们没有离开我，仿佛要确保我无法逃脱。我不会。

Rage and confusion burned my insides as I watched Al and the remaining soldiers submit my gadgets to two boys sitting by a corner with large computers in front of them. They had this signature ‘men in tech’ look but lacked the swagger to pull it off. I snorted when they began to scrutinize my laptop and phone, whilst pretending to look serious while at it, and deep down, I knew that they couldn’t do sh*t. If I wanted to hide something in those devices then there was nothing on planet earth that these two half-assed geeks could do to find them.
当我看着 Al 和剩下的士兵将我的小玩意交给坐在角落里的两个男孩，他们面前有一台大电脑时，愤怒和困惑燃烧着我的内心。他们有这种标志性的 “men in tech” 外观，但缺乏大摇大摆的气势。当他们开始仔细检查我的笔记本电脑和手机时，我哼了一声，同时假装看起来很严肃，在内心深处，我知道他们不能做屁话。如果我想在这些设备中隐藏什么东西，那么地球上这两个半屁股的极客就无法找到它们。

I was just about to make a snarky comment as regards that when I was suddenly hit with an overpowering presence and from the way my body responded to it, I instantly knew who it was.
我正想发表尖刻的评论，当我突然被一个压倒性的存在击中时，从我的身体对它的反应来看，我立刻就知道那是谁。

It was Alpha Zade, the motherfucker who had instructed his soldiers to humiliate me like this.
是Alpha Zade，那个指示他的士兵像这样羞辱我的混蛋。

I didn’t bother to turn around to acknowledge his presence even as everyone in the room began to bow at him in a show of respect. I didn’t even drop my gaze when he came to stand in front of me and his piercing gray eyes roved my entire body. I didn’t show fear or respect and he didn’t command it. I was mad. Rightfully so.
我懒得转身承认他的存在，即使房间里的每个人都开始向他鞠躬以示尊重。当他走到我面前时，我甚至没有垂头看，他那双锐利的灰色眼睛扫视着我的整个身体。我没有表现出恐惧或尊重，他也没有命令。我很生气。这是理所当然的。

Ignoring the murmurs in the crowd, I lifted my chin defiantly, such that I could look into his deep eyes, I spat; “What is this?”
我无视人群中的窃窃私语，挑衅地抬起下巴，以便能看到他深邃的眼睛，我啐了一口;“这是什么？”

Zade shrugged. “I should be asking you, Miss Draxler, what is this?”
扎德耸耸肩。“我应该问你，德拉克斯勒小姐，这是什么？”

At that statement, I gulped as a new sense of confusion washed over me. I was too stunned to speak or move mostly because for the first time, he referred to me by my last name. What surprised me even more was the look in his eyes which was filled with the kind of hostility that only members of his pack gave me. I was so shocked that I trembled.
听到这句话，我咽了口口水，一种新的困惑感涌上心头。我惊呆了，无法说话或移动，主要是因为这是他第一次用我的姓氏来称呼我。更让我惊讶的是他的眼神，里面充满了只有他的狼群成员才会给我的那种敌意。我吓得浑身发抖。

It took me a moment to finally find my voice. My throat and lips had suddenly gone so dry and darting out my tongue to lick my dry bottom lip, I whispered;
我花了一点时间才终于找到自己的声音。我的喉咙和嘴唇突然变得如此干燥，我低声说;

“I have no idea what this is.”
“我不知道这是什么。”

As I spoke, I noticed that Zade's eyes didn’t leave my face even for a nanosecond. Hell, he had even watched me lick my lips and had unconsciously mirrored my actions; and somehow, even amid all this chaos, that small action still managed to light my face and ears ablaze. I cleared my throat uncomfortably.
在我说话的时候，我注意到 Zade 的眼睛哪怕是一纳秒都没有离开我的脸。的，他甚至看着我舔嘴唇，并在不知不觉中模仿了我的行为;不知何故，即使在这一切混乱中，那个小小的动作仍然成功地照亮了我的脸和耳朵。我不舒服地清了清嗓子。

“Do you still work for your father?” He asked quietly.
“你还在为你爸爸工作吗？”他轻声问道。

Something about that question made my heart race as several thoughts swarmed my head. Zade said something else to me but I was too lost to pay any attention. My heart was beating frantically in my rib cage and I was becoming so suffocated, it was difficult to continue breathing. It didn’t help that my brain kept screaming at me that Zade and his pack thought I was the mole even though I have done nothing to make them think that way about me. He didn’t trust me. He doesn’t and never would. He thinks I am the mole.
这个问题让我心跳加速，因为有几个想法涌入了我的脑海。扎德对我说了些别的话，但我太迷茫了，没有理会。我的心脏在胸腔里疯狂地跳动，我变得非常窒息，难以继续呼吸。我的大脑一直对我尖叫，说 Zade 和他的狼群认为我是内奸，即使我没有做任何事情让他们那样看我，这无济于事。他不信任我。他没有，也永远不会。他认为我是内奸。

Breathe in. Breathe out.
吸入。呼出。

In. Out.
在。外。

I continued to chant in my head until some of the dark clouds that had formed in my mind began to dissipate. Tears were freely falling from my eyes now but this time, I did nothing to stop them. I was mad. And I was hurt.
我继续在脑海中念题，直到我脑海中形成的一些乌云开始消散。泪水现在不停地从我的眼眶中滑落，但这一次，我没有做任何事情来阻止它们。我很生气。我受伤了。

My anger and hurt made me so blind that for the first few minutes, I couldn’t see Zade’s face even though he was standing right in front of me. All I saw was red. A red rage that threatened to drown me and everyone present in the room.
我的愤怒和伤害使我如此盲目，以至于在最初的几分钟里，即使 Zade 就站在我面前，我也看不到他的脸。我看到的只是红色。一股红色的怒火，威胁要淹死我和房间里的每个人。

I saw him tilt his head to the side. There was a look of… was that compassion on his face? when he said to me; “The soldiers we sent to the location you gave to us earlier walked straight into an ambush.”
我看到他把头歪向一边。有一种...... 他的脸上有怜悯吗？ 当他对我说;“我们派到你之前给我们的地点的士兵直接走进了埋伏。”

I heard his words but I didn’t care. I couldn’t care less when they already think I caused that. So I kept my mouth shut.
我听到了他的话，但我不在乎。当他们已经认为是我造成的时，我就不在乎了。所以我闭上了嘴。

“Antonio was also found de*d and that’s surprising because no one knew about the place or the boy until you mentioned them.”
“安东尼奥也被发现了，这很令人惊讶，因为在你提到他们之前，没有人知道这个地方或那个男孩。”

Yeah, right?!
是的，对吧？！

Still, I was mute.
尽管如此，我还是保持沉默。

My silence seemed to rile him up because then he took several steps closer to me until he was standing in my personal space and then he snapped; “Have you gone deaf?”
我的沉默似乎激怒了他，因为然后他向我靠近了几步，直到他站在我的私人空间里，然后他啪地一声;“你聋了吗？”

His words stung and so did the accusations. I was just about to tell him that I wasn’t deaf when one of the so-called ‘tech gurus’ spoke up. He said; “Her system is clean, Sir. We’ve gone through all her recent activities and there’s nothing suspicious. She indeed tracked the boy’s phone using his IP address to the shed by the lakeside.”
他的话刺痛了他，那些指控也刺痛了他。我正要告诉他我不是聋子，这时一位所谓的“技术专家”开口了。他说;“她的身体很干净，先生。我们已经查看了她最近的所有活动，没有任何可疑之处。她确实使用男孩的 IP 地址追踪了男孩的电话到湖边的棚子。

“And she found it by exactly 10:34am this morning.” The other added, causing the room to fall into a state of silence.
“她在今天早上 10 点 34 分整找到了它。”另一个人补充道，让房间里陷入了寂静状态。

“Are you sure about that?” A dark eyed man with heavy appearance who I recently learned was Sheila’s father, Dom, growled at the boys and I couldn’t help but notice how they shrunk away from him before nodding in uniform.
“你确定吗？”我最近了解到一个黑眼睛、外表沉重的男人是 Sheila 的父亲 Dom，他对男孩们咆哮，我不禁注意到他们是如何从他身边缩开的，然后穿着制服点头。

“We’ve gone through everything here and she’s clean.” They answered again but my attention was not on them anymore. I was more interested in their Alpha.
“我们已经经历了这里的一切，她很干净。”他们再次回答，但我的注意力不再放在他们身上。我对他们的 Alpha 更感兴趣。

Zade looked at me, hurt and regret evident in his eyes while I, on the other hand, glared back. Deep down, I was glad that I had been vindicated and that the issue didn’t escalate to something greater than this but I was hurt. And mad. And I knew now that this pack would never accept me, regardless of what I did or how many times my innocence was proven.
扎德看着我，眼中流露出伤痛和遗憾，而我则瞪着我。在内心深处，我很高兴我得到了平反，问题没有升级到比这更大的事情，但我受伤了。而且很生气。我现在知道，这个群体永远不会接受我，无论我做了什么，也不管我的清白被证明多少次。

Right then and there, I made a decision.
就在那时，我做出了一个决定。

With tears streaming down my face, I leaned closer to Zade but I didn’t drop my voice. Whatever I had to say, I wanted everyone present in this room to hear.
泪流满面，我靠得更近了，但我没有压低声音。无论我要说什么，我都希望在座的每个人都能听到。

“Now that it is established that I am not the mole in your pack…” I drawled, forcing every anger I felt, every disdain in my vei*s, seep into my words, “…I am glad. But I no longer want to be here. I thank you for your hospitality but I’d rather remain a rogue than be in a pack where everyone points accusatory fingers at me every time something goes wrong.”
“既然已经确定我不是你背包里的内奸......”我抽搐着，强迫我感受到的每一次愤怒，我面前的每一次轻蔑，都渗入我的话语中，“......我很高兴。但我不想再在这里了。我感谢你的款待，但我宁愿继续做个流氓，也不愿待在一个每次出问题时每个人都对我指责的群体中。

My rage was so immense but it was nothing compared to the hurt I felt r*pping my heart into shreds. Blame the mate bond for that. In anger, I snatched my phone from the so-called ‘tech savvy’ men but just as I turned to leave, Zade called out to me in a shaky voice.
我的愤怒是如此巨大，但与我感到的将我的心撕成碎片的伤害相比，这算不了什么。这要怪副邦德。愤怒的我从那些所谓的“精通技术”的人手中抢走了我的手机，但就在我转身离开时，Zade 用颤抖的声音喊我。

At first, I wasn’t sure I heard him right. Goddess, it had to be impossible. I spun on my heels as I turned to him, surprised when I saw nervousness reeking off of him in waves. His arms were outstretched but not touching me and he was anxious as hell.
起初，我不确定自己是否听错了他的话。女神，这一定是不可能的。我转过身来，转向他，惊讶地看到他身上一阵的紧张气息。他伸出双臂，但没有碰到我，他非常焦虑。

That was new.
那是新的。

I wanted to comment on his behavior when he said the word again, and this time I froze.
当他再次说出这个词时，我想评论他的行为，这一次我愣住了。

“Wait please, Lavender.”
“请稍等，拉文德。”

Shock ran through my body as several memories swarmed through my mind. Memories that my brain had suppressed for the longest time. I knew someone once who used to call me that a long time ago, and his name was… Zade!
震惊贯穿我的身体，几段记忆在我的脑海中涌动。我的大脑压抑了最长时间的记忆。我认识一个很久以前常这样叫我的人，他的名字是......扎德！

Zade, a child from the orphanage where I grew up.
Zade，一个来自我长大的孤儿院的孩子。

My eyes widened when I realized that the previous article I had read about Alpha Zade stated that he also stayed in an orphanage for a while for protection and I gasped.
当我意识到我之前读到的关于 Alpha Zade 的文章说他还在孤儿院呆了一段时间以保护我时，我睁大了眼睛，我倒抽了一口气。

This could not be possible!
这是不可能的！

It wasn’t real. They could not be the same person or could they?
那不是真的。他们不可能是同一个人，或者他们可能是同一个人吗？

4、

My head was reeling.
我的头晕目眩。

Memories fleeted through my head as I stared up at him and like a broken videotape, my brain veered back to life. Most of the repressed memories of my childhood began to flood my head, momentarily making me dizzy.
当我抬头凝视着他时，记忆在我的脑海中转瞬即逝，就像一盘破损的录像带一样，我的大脑又回到了生活。我童年的大部分压抑记忆开始涌入我的脑海，一时让我头晕目眩。

I could remember Zade, the young gloomy boy at the orphanage who had been my friend and helped me perfect my painting skills. The one whom Madame Devi, the head nun told me had been adopted. I could clearly remember her words now, and they rang through my head over and over again until it began to h*rt my brain.
我还记得孤儿院里那个阴郁的小男孩 Zade，他曾经是我的朋友，帮助我完善了绘画技巧。修女长德维夫人告诉我的那个孩子是被收养的。我现在能清楚地记得她的话，它们一遍又一遍地在我的脑海中回响，直到它开始困扰我的大脑。

“Oh that one, him! He’s gone. He’s been adopted and I cannot be happier for us that we’ve been finally ridden of his darkness!” She had said, dismissively flicking her wrist in a manner that showed a young me just how much she didn’t want to talk about him.
“哦，那个，他！他走了。他被收养了，我很高兴我们终于摆脱了他的黑暗！她说着，轻蔑地轻弹手腕，向年轻的我表明她有多么不想谈论他。

I hated her for a long time for describing him with such spiteful words. I hated the other children that cheered too, happy that he was finally gone with his expensive art supplies and beautiful clothes. I hated myself for feeling bad and mourning his absence, and I hated Zade for a long time because he left without saying goodbye. Life at the orphanage became boring for me, that was until I was taken too by Father.
我很久都恨她用这种恶毒的词语来形容他。我讨厌其他也欢呼的孩子，很高兴他终于带着昂贵的美术用品和漂亮的衣服走了。我讨厌自己，因为我感觉难过，为他的缺席而哀悼，我讨厌扎德很长一段时间，因为他没有说再见就走了。孤儿院的生活对我来说变得无聊，直到我也被爸爸带走了。

I was snapped out of my thoughts when I felt a tug. Blinking, I was surprised to notice that Zade was pulling me out of the crowded room while everyone watched on with confusion on their faces. Zade didn’t stop dragging me after we got out of the room even as my body was reluctant to follow him and I, on the other hand, did not try to snatch my hands out of his hold, even though the electric sparks surging between us threatened to drown me.
当我感到一阵拉扯时，我从思绪中醒来。眨了眨眼，我惊讶地注意到 Zade 正在把我从拥挤的房间里拉出来，而每个人都在一旁看着，脸上带着困惑。我们走出房间后，Zade并没有停止拖着我，即使我的身体不愿意跟着他，另一方面，我也没有试图把我的手从他的手中抢走，即使我们之间涌动的电火花有要淹死我的危险。

I followed him blindly as he led me through several corridors and again, I was brought out of my reverie when I realized that we were on familiar grounds. Trying to focus, I glanced around me quickly, taking in the fallen items and the canvas discarded on the floor, and I visibly relaxed. We were in my room.
当他带我穿过几条走廊时，我盲目地跟着他，当我意识到我们在熟悉的地方时，我又一次从遐想中走出来。为了集中注意力，我快速环顾四周，看着掉落的物品和丢弃在地板上的帆布，我明显放松了下来。我们在我的房间里。

“Hazel…” he breathed out, his voice was so soft that it had me looking up at him in surprise.
“榛子......”他呼出一口气，他的声音是如此轻柔，以至于我惊讶地抬头看着他。

And then it hit me. He recognized me too. But since when?
然后我就想到了。他也认出了我。但从什么时候开始呢？

That thought made a lot of emotions clash in my head, most of which were difficult to discern. I didn’t look at him this time, couldn’t look at him, because I wasn’t sure of what I would find in his eyes. Deep down, I didn’t even know what I wanted to find, so instead, I asked; “Since when did you realize that it was me? Since when did you recognize me?”
这个想法让我的脑海中发生了很多情绪冲突，其中大部分都很难辨别。这次我没有看他，不能看他，因为我不确定我会在他的眼睛里找到什么。在内心深处，我什至不知道我想找到什么，所以，我反而问;“你从什么时候开始意识到是我？你从什么时候开始认出我来的？

I saw Zade gulp and I immediately knew that I wouldn’t like his response. He looked away from me to stare at the window. His voice was low and he sounded hesitant but I heard him.
我看到 Zade 大口大口地喝着，我立刻知道我不喜欢他的回答。他把目光从我身上移开，盯着窗户。他的声音很低，听起来很犹豫，但我听到了。

“Since the very beginning.”
“从一开始就。”

I gasped.
我倒抽了一口气。

At the sound, Zade quickly turned to me, he held both of my hands in his, he rushed out; “I am sorry, I really am… but I didn’t know how to bring up the conversation with you, especially when I knew that you didn’t recognize who I was. Also, you know, I couldn’t bring it up as we didn’t particularly meet in a good way.”
听到声音，扎德赶紧转向我，他握住我的双手，冲了出去;“对不起，我真的......但我不知道如何提起与你的对话，尤其是当我知道你不认识我是谁时。另外，你知道的，我不能提起这件事，因为我们没有特别以一种好的方式相遇。

At that, I glanced up at him whilst realizing that we didn’t particularly meet in a good way. We’d met on the day I tried to kil* him...
听到这话，我抬头看了他一眼，同时意识到我们并没有特别好地见面。 我们在我试图杀死他的那天认识了......

“Oh,” I sighed. “Zade, I am sorry for how we met too, I was only following my father’s orders.”
“哦，”我叹了口气。“扎德，我也为我们是如何相遇的感到抱歉，我只是听从了我父亲的命令。”

“I know,” he whispered as he gently brushed a finger over my chin. That tiny action made tons of goosebumps erupt on my skin but before I could react to it, he continued; “Do you know how it hurt me to watch? To have the words on my tongue but not be able to say them because I feared that you wouldn’t remember, or worse still, that it may not be you?”
“我知道，”他低声说，同时用一根手指轻轻地抚摸着我的下巴。那个微小的动作让我的皮肤上起了一堆鸡皮疙瘩，但在我反应过来之前，他继续说;“你知道看着我有多伤心吗？把这些话挂在嘴上，但又不能说出来，因为我担心你不记得，或者更糟糕的是，可能不是你？

He cried out, causing the words I wanted to say to immediately die down in my throat. “I am sorry. I swear to the moon goddess that I really am, especially for the way I left the orphanage… without saying anything, I didn’t know and I really hope that you would forgive me.”
他大声喊叫，让我想说的话立刻在我的喉咙里消失了。“我很抱歉。我向月亮女神发誓，我真的是，尤其是我离开孤儿院的方式......什么都没说，我不知道，我真的希望你能原谅我。

Those words made me remember how close we had been. But most of all, I remembered how I had run after his father’s car relentlessly but it never stopped. I dropped my gaze.
这些话让我想起了我们曾经有多么亲密。但最重要的是，我想起了我是如何无情地追着他父亲的车跑的，但它从未停下来。我垂下了目光。

Right now, I didn’t know how to feel or the significance of this new information on whatever we have going on now. He was my friend. Was. Because whatever we had was in the past.
现在，我不知道该如何感受，也不知道这些新信息对我们现在正在发生的任何事情的意义。他是我的朋友。是。 因为我们所拥有的一切都是过去。

But still, I couldn’t help but feel this flutter in my chest at the news. I was still so mad at him, extremely mad if you asked me for the embarrassment he put me through earlier today but still…
但是，听到这个消息，我还是忍不住感到胸口的颤动。我仍然对他很生气，如果你问我今天早些时候他让我经历的尴尬，我会非常生气，但仍然......

“I forgive you.”
“我原谅你。”

“Really?”
“真的吗？”

“Yes, I do,” I answered with a small smile.
“是的，我愿意，”我微微一笑回答。

Zade smiled too as he held my hands and carefully led me through the disheveled room, expertly avoiding the broken items on the floor and went to sit on my bed.
扎德也笑了，他握着我的手，小心翼翼地带我穿过凌乱的房间，熟练地避开地板上的破损物品，然后坐在我的床上。

“Sit with me,” he whispered and obediently, I did. “I’m sorry,” his voice was merely above a whisper as he looked around at the scattered items on the floor, my now broken canvas and my spilled art supplies.
“和我一起坐，”他低声说，我顺从地照做了。“对不起，”他环顾四周，看着地板上散落的物品，我现在已经破损的画布和洒落的艺术用品，他的声音只是耳语。

“I’m sorry,” he said again and this time I nodded in understanding. “I didn’t ask them to lay a finger on you but I guess they were so blinded by anger, and with the idea that you were the mole that they acted on impulse.”
“对不起，”他又说了一遍，这一次我点头表示理解。“我没有让他们对你指手画脚，但我猜他们被愤怒蒙蔽了双眼，认为你是内奸，所以他们一时冲动地行动了。”

I wanted to tell him that they still didn’t have any right to treat me like that until proven guilty, but the moment I opened my mouth to speak, he quickly planted his index finger on my lips and whispered; “Shhh… I’ll punish them. Trust me.”
我想告诉他，在被证明有罪之前，他们仍然没有任何权利那样对待我，但当我张开嘴说话的那一刻，他迅速将食指放在我的嘴唇上，低声说;“嘘......我会惩罚他们。相信我。

And I trusted him.
我信任他。

Amid this chaos, amid the conflicting feelings waging a war in my heart, I trusted him. His people may despise me, talk bad about me, hell, they may even humiliate me but he wouldn’t because he is my mate.
在这种混乱中，在我心中发动战争的矛盾情感中，我信任他。他的人可能会鄙视我，说我的坏话，见鬼，他们甚至可能会羞辱我，但他不会，因为他是我的伴侣。

And he is my friend.
他是我的朋友。

Deep down in my heart, I knew that I couldn’t see a future with us in it anymore. I didn’t see us getting anywhere. We were two worlds apart now. Gone were the days when all we were were two children. Now, we are two adults. A man and a woman. An Alpha and a rogue. A man dedicated to doing good and the daughter of a well known monster. We were too different.
在我内心深处，我知道我再也看不到有我们的未来了。我没有看到我们取得任何进展。我们现在相距甚远。我们只是两个孩子的日子已经一去不复返了。现在，我们是两个成年人。一男一女。一个 Alpha 和一个流氓。一个致力于做好事的人，一个知名怪物的女儿。我们太不同了。

5、

He still had his signature dark long hair and his boyish handsomeness that always managed to make everyone around him stare, and most of his facial features were still the same, only that now they were more pronounced and he had lost all of his baby fat. Zade had always been so beautiful that sometimes, I suspected that it was why most of the boys in the orphanage hated him then.
他仍然留着他标志性的深色长发和他男孩子般的英俊，总是让周围的人都盯着他看，他的大部分面部特征还是一样的，只是现在它们更加明显了，他已经失去了所有的婴儿肥。扎德一直都是那么美丽，以至于有时，我怀疑这就是当时孤儿院里大多数男孩都讨厌他的原因。

Deciding to put myself into good use instead of spending the entire morning watching him sleep, I rolled off the bed and tiptoed into the adjoining bathroom by the other side of the room for a quick shower. The bathroom was crisp clean, a contrast to my reflection in the mirror which was a testament to the rough night I had been subjected to. My entire body ached tremendously and I had some bruises here and there on my skin, but what worried me most was the bite mark on my neck.
我决定好好利用自己，而不是花一整个早上看着他睡觉，我从床上滚下来，蹑手蹑脚地走进房间另一边的隔壁浴室快速洗了个澡。浴室干净整洁，与我在镜子里的倒影形成鲜明对比，这证明了我所经历的那个艰难的夜晚。我整个身体都非常疼痛，皮肤上到处都有一些瘀伤，但最让我担心的是脖子上的咬痕。

Zade had indeed marked me.
扎德确实标记了我。

He had marked me and now the evidence was right there, glaring, on my neck for the entire world to see… and sniff.
He 标记了我，现在证据就在那里，耀眼，在我的脖子上，让全世界都看到......和嗅闻。

In a pack where it was obvious that I wasn’t wanted, their Alpha marked me. I knew that they disliked my existence at the moment but this? This was an avenue for them to hate me even more.
在一个明显不需要我的群体中，他们的 Alpha 标记了我。我知道他们现在不喜欢我的存在，但这个呢？这是他们更恨我的途径。

I shuddered as I brought my fingers up to the mark on my neck and an electrifying feeling coursed through my body. It was so intense that it had me trembling for a few seconds, forcing me to grip onto the bathroom sink for support.
当我将手指伸向脖子上的印记时，我浑身颤抖，一种令人振奋的感觉在我的身体中流淌。它是如此强烈，以至于我颤抖了几秒钟，迫使我紧紧抓住浴室的水槽寻求支撑。

Now that was bad. This is a bad idea.
现在情况很糟糕。这是一个坏主意。

I quickly showered and dressed up in a simple blue tank top and black sweatpants and stepped out of the bathroom after tying my hair up into a ponytail, surprised to find him already awake, and waiting for me on my bed.
我迅速洗了个澡，穿上一件简单的蓝色背心和黑色运动裤，把头发扎成马尾辫后走出浴室，惊讶地发现他已经醒了，在我的床上等着我。

“Hi,” breathed out as I stepped further into the room but avoided going anywhere close to the bed. Zade didn’t speak to me and neither did I, at least for the next few minutes.
“嗨，”我进一步走进房间，但避免靠近床的任何地方。Zade 没有和我说话，我也没有，至少在接下来的几分钟里是这样。

I noticed how his eagle eyes watched me while I walked around the room to fetch a hair clip and sent wild emotions shooting to my core but I ignored it. I had something more important to talk to him about.
我注意到当我在房间里走来走去拿发夹时，他的鹰眼是如何看着我的，并将狂野的情绪冲向我的核心，但我没有理会它。我有更重要的事情要和他谈。

“Alpha…” I called out to him, and at the sound of my voice, he stopped typing away on his phone and raised his eyes to meet mine. I found emotions of great intensity swirling in those gray orbs. I was shocked at his genuineness, at this vulnerability he was showing this morning. Or wait, was it because he just woke up?
“阿尔法......”我向他喊道，听到我的声音，他停止了在手机上打字，抬起眼睛与我对视。我发现那些灰色的球体中盘旋着强烈的情绪。我对他的真诚感到震惊，对他今天早上表现出的这种脆弱感到震惊。或者等等，是因为他刚刚醒来吗？

“Zade,” he supplied softly, “I told you, you should call me Zade.”
“扎德，”他轻声说，“我告诉过你，你应该叫我扎德。

Now, that was another problem.
现在，这是另一个问题。

Knowing that the next words that were about to leave my lips would cause chaos, I dropped my head and muttered; “You marked me,”
我知道接下来即将离开我嘴唇的话会引起混乱，我低下头喃喃自语;“你标记了我，”

Silence.
沉默。

That was all that descended in the room in the next few minutes. I had already begun to think that he wasn’t going to respond when suddenly, he said; “I know I did.”
这就是接下来几分钟里房间里发生的一切。我已经开始认为他不会在突然的时候做出回应，他说;“我知道我做到了。”

Surprisingly, he didn’t sound angry. He wasn’t even in the least bothered by the mark as much as I was. I watched him for a while, gauging his reaction and when he still didn’t give anything away, I rushed out; “I don’t know why you did it… considering the kind of relationship that we have going on. But I cannot go around this pack where everyone obviously hates me with your mark standing out for all to see.
令人惊讶的是，他听起来并没有生气。他甚至不像我那样被这个标记所困扰。我观察了他一会儿，观察他的反应，当他仍然没有透露任何东西时，我冲了出去;“我不知道你为什么这样做......考虑到我们正在进行的那种关系。但我不能绕过这个大家显然都讨厌我的包，你的标记让所有人都能看到。

“I do not hate you,” he said suddenly, which made me stop talking.
“我不恨你，”他突然说，这让我停止了说话。

I do not know why but something about his words made my heart flutter in my chest, but dismissing it, I waved him off; “It does not matter now or does it? If every member of your pack decides to ki*l me off, can you, just you because you’re their Alpha, be able to stop it before it happens?”
我不知道为什么，但他的话让我的心在胸口怦怦直跳，但我没有理会它，挥手让他离开;“现在不重要了，对吧？如果你的狼群中的每个成员都决定杀了我，你能不能，因为你是他们的 Alpha，就你自己，能够在它发生之前阻止它？

From the corner of my eye, I saw Zade go completely still. He discarded his phone now to rivet all of his attention on me, and right now, I couldn’t help but squirm under the intense scrutiny he was regarding me with, and the anger that was swirling in his eyes.
从我的眼角余光中，我看到 Zade 完全静止了。他现在扔掉了他的手机，把所有的注意力都集中在我身上，而此时此刻，在他严密的审视和他眼中盘旋的愤怒下，我忍不住蠕动着。

“So what are you driving at, Hazel?” He gnashed out with a voice that was so raw, and so rough it resembled the sound of metal scraping on ice. I flinched.
“所以你开车干什么呢，Hazel？”他用一种如此生硬、如此粗糙的声音咬牙切齿，就像金属在冰上刮擦的声音。我畏缩了一下。

Now, because I was becoming too jittery and quite uncomfortable, I decided to prance around the room while still managing to avoid all the areas close to the bed… and close to him. The awkward silence that befell us was so thick that it could be cut with a knif* and while I pretended to think, even though I already knew what I wanted to say. He watched me like a hawk, not once taking his eyes off me.
现在，因为我变得太紧张了，很不舒服，我决定在房间里跳来跳去，同时仍然设法避开靠近床的所有区域......并且离他很近。降临在我们身上的尴尬沉默是如此沉重，以至于可以用刀子*割开它，而我却假装思考，即使我已经知道我想说什么。他像鹰一样看着我，眼睛一次也没有从我身上移开。

“I want it gone,” I finally said, causing his eyes to widen before he went back to plastering his usual stoic mask back on his face.
“我想让它消失，”我终于说，让他睁大了眼睛，然后他又把他平常坚忍的面具贴回脸上。

“You want the mark gone?” He asked in a tone of voice that had me stepping away from him in fear. Seeing my reaction, he growled deep in his throat but somehow, that only managed to scare me more than it warned me.
“你想把印记去掉吗？”他问道，语气让我害怕地从他身边走开。看到我的反应，他在喉咙里深深地咆哮着，但不知何故，这只比警告我更吓到我。

I continued; “Yes. I want it gone because I do not want problems from members of your pack. Take Miss Sheila for example, I don’t want to imagine the lengths she would take when she sees this.” I snapped, pointing at the spot where the mark was situated on my neck.
我继续说;“是的。我希望它消失，因为我不想让你们的狼群成员出问题。以 Sheila 小姐为例，我不想想象她看到这个时会花多长时间。我厉声说，指着我脖子上那个印记的地方。

“Sheila is unimportant.”
“希拉不重要。”

I saw Zade’s eyes follow my finger to where I was pointing at. He stared hard and long at the mark and I could swear that I saw his eyes darken while he did so. Something akin to desire fleeted past his gaze before he clamped it down, got up from the bed and began to throw his clothes back on. I watched him dress up with rage bubbling up within me, rage centered mainly around the fact that he was about to walk out of this conversation so conveniently because he wasn’t the one with the mark on his skin.
我看到 Zade 的眼睛顺着我的手指看向我所指的地方。他狠狠地盯着那个标记，我可以发誓，我看到他的眼睛在他这样做的时候变暗了。某种类似于欲望的东西从他的视线中掠过，然后他压住了它，从床上站起来，开始重新穿上衣服。我看着他打扮得漂漂亮亮的，我心中怒火中涌动，怒火主要集中在他即将如此方便地退出这场谈话的事实上，因为他不是那个皮肤上有印记的人。

And now, I realized to my chagrin that I would take the fall if it got out.
而现在，我懊恼地意识到，如果它出来了，我会接受这个摔倒。

He was about to walk past me when I desperately held onto his arm. I felt the surge of electricity that erupted from where I touched his skin and it sent my body heating up again, but I ignored it. I couldn’t afford to be wanton right now when I had a problem as massive as this weighing me down.
他正要从我身边走过，我拼命抓住他的手臂。我感觉到从我触碰到他的皮肤的地方喷出的电流，它让我的身体再次升温，但我没有理会它。我现在不能肆意妄为，因为我遇到了这么大的问题，让我感到不堪重负。

“I want it gone, please.” I said and he nodded.
“我希望它消失，拜托。”我说，他点点头。

“And I heard you the first time, Hazel. Get ready in 20 minutes, I’m taking you somewhere, to a witch who would mask it until I find a solution as to how I can get rid of it.” He answered coldly.
“我第一次听到你的话，黑泽尔。20分钟后准备好，我带你去某个地方，找一个女巫，她会掩盖它，直到我找到办法摆脱它。他冷冷地回答。

Without another word, he sauntered away leaving me, with a cold and pissed off attitude.
他一言不发，带着冷漠和生气的态度溜达着离开了我。

Was it because I said I didn’t want the mark? But getting rid of it would do both of us good.
是因为我说我不想要这个标记吗？但摆脱它对我们双方都有好处。

Deciding to thrash these thoughts, I rushed into the closet to change into something else. He said he wanted me ready in 20, and I couldn’t afford to get him angrier by being late.
决定打消这些想法，我冲进壁橱换上别的东西。他说他希望我在 20 岁后做好准备，我不能因为迟到而让他更生气。

*

When Zade talked about us going to a Witch, my mind had conjured up images of a hut with green clouds surrounding it or a caravan with spells, incense and tonics sprawled everywhere, so I wassurprised when we arrived at a tattoo shop instead, that and the fact that it was situated at a busy street in the middle of a small town where humans lived.
当扎德说起我们去找女巫时，我的脑海里浮现出一个绿云环绕的小屋，或者到处都是咒语、熏香和滋补品的大篷车，所以当我们到达一家纹身店时，我感到很惊讶，而且它位于人类居住的小镇中心的一条繁忙的街道上。

As if noticing my confusion, Zade turned to me and said; “Zeke is a very powerful wizard but he is also a tattoo artist.”
仿佛注意到了我的困惑，扎德转过身来对我说;“Zeke 是一个非常强大的巫师，但他也是一位纹身艺术家。”

His explanation managed to leave me with more questions but instead of voicing them out, I clamped my mouth shut, focusing instead on the task at hand, which was cloaking the m*ting mark on my neck before any member of Zade’s pack sees it.
他的解释设法给我留下了更多的问题，但我没有说出来，而是闭上了嘴巴，而是专注于手头的任务，那就是在 Zade 的狼群中的任何成员看到之前掩盖我脖子上的标记。

Zade introduced me to Zeke who was a chubby almond skinned man with long dark red hair, a round face, numerous piercings on his ears and lips and a wide smile, and after informing him about the reason we were here, he turned to me.
扎德向我介绍了泽克，他是一个胖乎乎的杏仁色皮肤男人，有一头深红色的长发，圆脸，耳朵和嘴唇上有很多洞，笑容灿烂，在告诉他我们来这里的原因后，他转向我。

“I have an important meeting to be at in a few minutes so I’ll leave you here with Zeke and ask one of the soldiers to drive you home by the time you’re done.”
“我几分钟后有一个重要的会议要参加，所以我把你和Zeke留在这儿，然后让一名士兵在你完成工作后开车送你回家。”

My mouth fell open. “No.”
我张大了嘴巴。“不。”

“No, what?” He snapped, sounding impatient. He was still very angry, I could sense it.
“不，什么？”他厉声说，听起来很不耐烦。他仍然很生气，我能感觉到。

I wanted to tell him that I didn’t want him to leave me here with a wizard in a strange town, and that I wanted him to be around while the mark was being cloaked, but I didn’t. I thought it may h*rt. Instead, I shook my head and muttered; “No worries, I’ll be fine.”
我想告诉他，我不想让他把我和一个巫师留在一个陌生的小镇上，我希望他在标记被掩盖的时候在身边，但我没有。我想它可能会。相反，我摇摇头，喃喃自语;“别担心，我会没事的。”

He nodded and after going back to talk with Zeke, he left.
他点点头，回去和 Zeke 交谈后，他离开了。

Now, being left alone with Zeke wasn’t as bad as I thought. The man was chatty and witty, and after just a few minutes, I decided that I liked him. The process of masking the mark was a short one, and without much pain. After thanking Zeke, I left the shop but just as I was about to get into the waiting car which Zade’s driver was standing in front of, I stopped when I felt someone’s gaze b*rning into my skin.
现在，和 Zeke 单独在一起并不像我想象的那么糟糕。这个男人很健谈，很机智，仅仅几分钟后，我就决定我喜欢他。掩盖标记的过程很短，没有太多痛苦。道谢Zeke后，我离开了商店，但就在我准备上Zade的司机站在前面的等候的汽车时，我停了下来，这时我感觉到有人的目光盯着我的皮肤。

Surprisingly, it was Tristan in the flesh and he was staring at me in a way that made my skin crawl in apprehension.
令人惊讶的是，这是特里斯坦的肉身，他盯着我看的方式让我的皮肤在恐惧中蠕动。

While Tristan was supposedly ‘easygoing and charming’ to everyone who’s ever met him, to me he was none of those. Now, the thing was that he’s never done anything wrong to me, hell, he even pretends that I do not exist but there was something about him… something that I could not wrap my fingers around that always sent chills down my spine. After speding years with my father, trust me, I can see him a bit maniacal with the way he carried himself.
虽然 Tristan 在每个见过他的人眼中都被认为是“随和和迷人”的，但在我看来，他不是那种人。现在，问题是他从来没有对我做过任何错事，见鬼，他甚至假装我不存在，但他身上有某种东西......我无法用手指缠绕的东西总是让我脊背发凉。在与我父亲一起度过了几年之后，相信我，我可以看到他对自己的行事方式有点疯狂。

Deciding to pretend not to see him, I opened the car’s door but just before I stepped in, he called out to me, shocking me even more.
我决定假装没有看到他，打开了车门，但就在我踏进去之前，他向我喊道，这让我更加震惊。

“Hazel, you dare say you didn’t see me?” He asked and even though his tone was light, I still couldn’t help but fear that he was pissed.
“黑泽尔，你敢说你没看到我？”他问道，尽管他的语气很轻松，但我还是忍不住担心他生气了。

I shook my head. “I saw you,” I said, “…but I felt I wasn’t of any significance to you. Hello.”
我摇摇头。“我看见你了，”我说，“......但我觉得我对你来说没有任何意义。你好。

At that, Tristan smiled- more like bared his teeth at me. He walked over until he was just leaning into me and whispered;
听到这话，特里斯坦笑了——更像是对我龇牙咧嘴。他走过去，直到他只是靠在我身上，低声说;

“Oh, you are significant. Have a nice day ahead.”
“哦，你很重要。祝你今天过得愉快。

I had no idea what he meant by that and even though he said it so softly, it still managed to scare me shitless. Unconsciously, I pulled up the collar of my shirt to hide the spot where Zade’s mark had been.
我不知道他这句话是什么意思，即使他说得那么轻声细语，它仍然成功地把我吓得一屁滚尿流。不知不觉中，我拉起了衬衫的领子，以隐藏 Zade 的印记所在的地方。

Goosebumps erupted on my skin when he still wouldn’t move away or speak, making me uncomfortable and when couldn’t bear it anymore, I nodded curtly and rushed out;
当他仍然不肯走开或说话时，我的皮肤上起了鸡皮疙瘩，这让我很不舒服，当再也忍受不了时，我匆匆地点点头，冲了出去;

“Have a nice day.”
“祝你有美好的一天。”

And with that, I got into the car very quickly so that he wouldn’t say anything more to me. Tristan didn’t move out of the way as the car roared to life, and he still didn’t even when the driver began to drive away.
“说完，我很快就上了车，这样他就不会再对我说什么了。当汽车咆哮着启动时，特里斯坦没有让开，即使司机开始开车离开，他仍然没有。

6、

As the rain pelted down the pack house and the city, I tossed restlessly in my bed, unable to sleep. I hated the rain, the smell, the thunderstorms… but what I hated the most was how Nadine loved it so much but could no longer witness one.
当雨水倾泻而下时，我不安地躺在床上，无法入睡。我讨厌雨水、气味、雷雨......但我最讨厌的是 Nadine 如此热爱它，但再也无法亲眼目睹它。

Nadine was my sister and because she was a few years older than I was, whenever Mom and Dad were out for pack meetings and stuff, she always took care of me. She was the first woman I ever loved and felt a sense of possessiveness towards… until she was mu*dered. And just like that, my entire world became bleak, I felt like I no longer had any sense of self and ever since, I have made it my life’s mission to avenge her de*th.
Nadine 是我的姐姐，因为她比我大几岁，所以每当爸爸妈妈出去参加聚会之类的事情时，她总是照顾我。她是我爱过的第一个女人，对她有一种占有欲......直到她被 Mu*dered 了。就这样，我的整个世界都变得黯淡无光，我觉得我不再有任何自我意识，从那时起，我就把为她报仇作为我的人生使命。

And till date, her mu*derer still roams freely. But not for long.
直到今天，她的 mu*derer 仍然自由漫游。但好景不长。

Giving up, I rolled out of bed and walked barefoot to the mini bar situated by the corner of my room. I helped myself to a bottle of scotch and drinking straight out of the bottle, I dragged my feet to the window to look out at the city.
放弃了，我从床上滚下来，赤脚走到房间角落的迷你吧。我帮自己拿了一瓶苏格兰威士忌，直接从瓶子里喝了一口，我拖着脚走到窗前，看着外面的城市。

The night sky was beautiful and as the rain fell, the entire place was silent. I loved the feel… the chills that it sent to my spine, but I still hated the overall concept of rain.
夜空很美，随着雨的落下，整个地方都寂静无声。我喜欢这种感觉......它让我脊背发凉，但我仍然讨厌雨的整体概念。

The liquid fire burned through my throat to my stomach but it did nothing to calm the war waging deep inside my heart. I closed my eyes as I looked up at the ceiling, contemplating, and after several minutes of trying to convince myself not to go to Hazel, I finally gave up.
液体的火焰从我的喉咙燃烧到我的胃部，但它并没有平息我内心深处进行的战争。我闭上眼睛，抬头望着天花板，沉思着，经过几分钟的尝试说服自己不要去 Hazel，我终于放弃了。

I picked another bottle as I went out of my room but this was rum this time, and began to drink quickly. I was done with it before I arrived at her room and dumping the now-empty bottle into a potted plant close by, I twisted the doorknob and stepped inside.
我走出房间时又选了一瓶，但这次是朗姆酒，然后开始快速喝水。在我到达她的房间之前，我已经完成了这一切，把现在已经空的瓶子倒进了附近的盆栽里，我扭动门把手走了进去。

I had come here with the mindset that she would be fast asleep now, and that I was only here to watch her sleep while I sooth myself from thinking again about the kind of revenge necessary for my sister’s m*rder, so I was shocked when instead, I found her sitting by the window with her hands under her chin as she watched the rain…
我来到这里时，心里想着她现在会睡着了，我只是来这里看着她睡觉，同时我安抚自己，不要再想我姐姐的 m*rder 必须进行什么样的报复，所以我感到震惊，相反，我发现她坐在窗边，双手放在下巴下，看着雨......

Just like Nadine used to do.
就像 Nadine 以前做的那样。

Watching her in that posture made something in me shift. Hazel was just like Nadine in so many ways and even though I hated to admit that, I couldn’t shy away from the truth.
看着她那样的姿势，我内心的某种东西发生了变化。Hazel 在很多方面都和 Nadine 一样，尽管我讨厌承认这一点，但我无法回避事实。

She had been so lost in whatever trance she was in that she didn’t notice me coming into the room but when she finally did, I noticed how her body instantly went stiff. Almost discreetly, she reached for something that I suspected was a weapon close to her and after fisting it in her hands, she turned quickly in my direction… and sighed, visibly relaxing.
她一直沉浸在恍惚的状态中，以至于她没有注意到我走进房间，但当她终于注意到时，我注意到她的身体立刻变得僵硬。她几乎是小心翼翼地伸手去拿我怀疑是她身边的武器，在握紧拳头后，她迅速转向我的方向......然后叹了口气，明显放松了。

Something about that reaction warmed my heart. The fact that she didn’t see me as a threat even though deep down, she ought to. It was obvious now that she trusts me and I wasn’t sure how to feel about that.
这种反应让我感到温暖。事实上，她并没有把我看作一个威胁，尽管在内心深处她应该这样做。现在很明显，她信任我，我不确定对此有何感想。

I was a monster, a creep who’s kept her with me and would take her against her will if need be. Even the Heavens knew that I was still so mad at her, at the way she had dismissed my mark earlier today and even went as far as asking me for ways to get rid of it. I hated that I had to give in to her wants despite how much it annoyed me and that now, even though I knew exactly where my mark was situated on her neck, I couldn’t see it.
我是一个怪物，一个把她留在我身边的怪物，如果需要的话，我会违背她的意愿带走她。就连上天也知道我仍然对她很生气，因为她今天早些时候对我的标记不屑一顾，甚至问我如何摆脱它。我讨厌我不得不屈服于她的愿望，尽管这让我很恼火，现在，即使我确切地知道我的印记在她脖子上的位置，我也看不到它。

He*l, it hurt me but right now was not the time. Right now, I wanted her, maybe just her presence but still...
哎呀，这让我很伤心，但现在还不是时候。现在，我想要她，也许只是她的存在，但仍然......

Pushing my thoughts out of my head and myself off the wall, I sauntered over to where she was seated close to the window, only stopping a few feet away from her to stop myself from jumping her. She was so beautiful, so breathtaking that it would be difficult for me to restrain myself. I was already beginning to fall in love with the silent companionship that came with having her around when suddenly, her voice rang through the room.
我把思绪从脑海中赶出去，把自己从墙上赶出去，大步走到她坐在靠近窗户的地方，只在离她几英尺远的地方停了下来，以防止自己跳她。她是如此美丽，如此令人叹为观止，以至于我很难克制自己。我已经开始爱上有她在身边带来的无声陪伴，突然，她的声音响彻了整个房间。

She asked; “Why are you here?”
她问;“你怎么在这里？”

Something about her words made my heart plummet in my chest. Not trusting my voice, I stood still, watching the rain even though I had no interest in it.
她的话让我的心在胸口猛然跳动。我不相信自己的声音，站着不动，看着雨，尽管我对雨毫无兴趣。

Did she not want me here?
她不想让我在这里吗？

I remained silent even though I could feel her gaze on my skin and notice how tense she was. Until suddenly, she stood up. She rounded the chair and was just about to go back to bed when I finally found my voice, I said; “I couldn’t sleep.”
即使我能感觉到她的目光在我的皮肤上，并注意到她有多么紧张，我仍然保持沉默。直到突然，她站了起来。她绕着椅子转了一圈，正要回去睡觉，我终于找到了自己的声音，我说;“我睡不着。”

And it was the truth.
这就是事实。

I saw how she went rigid when I uttered that statement but thankfully, she didn’t try to move away even as I walked over to pry the blad* out of her stiff hands. Her eyes searched my face with curiosity, but somehow, the manner in which she looked at me made my heart thaw. I wanted her to always look at me like that. It was gentle… almost loving.
我看到当我说出这句话时她是如何僵硬的，但谢天谢地，即使我走过去从她僵硬的手中撬出那块石头*，她也没有试图离开。她的眼睛好奇地打量着我的脸，但不知何故，她看着我的方式让我的心解冻了。我希望她总是那样看着我。它很温柔......几乎是爱。

“Why couldn’t you sleep?” She asked and I looked away.
“你怎么睡不着？”她问道，我把目光移开了。

I didn’t want to talk about this, especially not with her. Also, it wasn’t the reason I was here. I had come here to feel better about myself, not to talk about what was bothering me, and deciding that I wouldn’t talk too much on the topic, I simply said; “Because I hate it when it rains.” And as soon as I said that, she gasped. Her eyes were as round as saucers and I could almost smell the disbelief radiating off her.
我不想谈论这件事，尤其是不想和她谈论。而且，这不是我来这里的原因。我来这里是为了让自己感觉更好，不是为了谈论困扰我的事情，我决定不多谈这个话题，我只是说了一句;“因为我讨厌下雨。”我一说这句话，她就倒抽了一口气。她的眼睛像碟子一样圆，我几乎能闻到她身上散发出的难以置信。

“I love the rain.”
“我喜欢雨。”

‘I know,’ I wanted to say but I didn’t. Instead, I tilted my head to the side and mumbled the first thing that came to mind.
“我知道，”我想说，但我没有。相反，我把头歪向一边，喃喃自语着我想到的第一件事。

“Nadine loved the rain too.”
“娜丁也喜欢下雨。”

Sh*t! Sh*t!
嘘！嘘！

That wasn’t supposed to come out the way it did. Looking away from Hazel and the look of h*rt that she hadn’t even bothered to mask on her face, I added; “Nadine was my sister.”
这不应该以这种方式出现。我把目光从Hazel身上移开，看向她甚至懒得在脸上掩饰的h*rt表情，我补充道;“娜丁是我的姐姐。”

“Was?”
“是？”

I didn’t look at her then, I could not, especially not when my heart was threatening to expl*de in my chest. Balling my hands into fists by my sides, I gritted out; “Yes, was… she’s d*ad. She passed away when I was twelve.”
那时我没有看她，我不能，尤其是当我的心脏快要喷发到胸口的时候。我双手在身体两侧握成拳头，咬牙切齿地说道;“是的，曾经......她是 D*Ad。她在我十二岁时去世了。

What I hated more than telling her about Nadine, whose memories I held so dearly was the pitiful look she was throwing at me at the moment. I do not need it, I hated it, especially when her father is the mu*derer of my sister.
比起告诉她关于娜丁的事情，我更讨厌的是她此刻向我投来的可怜的眼神。我不需要它，我讨厌它，尤其是当她的父亲是我姐姐的 mu*derer 时。

I was only snapped out of my thoughts when I felt something on my shoulder and glancing down at it, I wasn’t so surprised when I saw that it was Hazel’s hands. I stood still.
当我感觉到肩膀上有什么东西并低头看了一眼时，我才从思绪中醒来，当我看到那是 Hazel 的手时，我并没有那么惊讶。我站着不动。

“I am sorry.” She murmured but as soon as the words escaped her lips, I moved away.
“我很抱歉。”她喃喃自语，但话一说出，我就走开了。

Maybe this is wrong, maybe I shouldn’t be here talking to her about Nadine. Maybe I shouldn’t have even come here in the first place. Feeling the need to leave, I turned away because truthfully, that was the better option.
也许这是错误的，也许我不应该在这里和她谈论 Nadine。也许我一开始就不应该来这里。觉得有必要离开，我转身离开了，因为说实话，那是更好的选择。

At least way better than explaining to her that her father had been the one responsible for my sister’s de*th. It was also better than letting her know that I had a deep rooted hatred for her father and everyone from his pack, especially his offspring; and that I had vowed to kil* all of them just like my sister had been kil*ed, including her, and that I wasn’t willing to go back on my words. Even with her.
至少比向她解释她爸爸是我姐姐的命运负责的人要好得多。这也比让她知道我对她父亲和他身边的每个人，尤其是他的后代有着根深蒂固的仇恨要好;而且我发誓要像我姐姐被杀害一样，把他们所有人都杀掉，包括她，而且我不愿意违背我的话。即使和她在一起。

“Zade, I didn’t mean…” she began to say but before the words could fully leave her mouth, instead of walking away like I wanted to, I sauntered over to her and slammed my lips against hers.
“扎德，我不是说......”她开始说，但话还没说完就说出口了，我没有像我想的那样走开，而是大步走到她身边，用我的嘴唇猛地撞上她的嘴唇。

At this point, I wanted her too much, I could take her soul.
在这一点上，我太想要她了，我可以带走她的灵魂。

As the kiss deepened, though I was certain of what was coming, I didn’t pull away. If anything, I rushed it, desperate to have her one more time. And she allowed me.
随着吻的加深，虽然我很确定会发生什么，但我并没有抽身。如果有的话，我急忙赶走，不顾一切地想再得到她一次。她允许了我。

The rain pelting relentlessly down the house, by the time I was done, she was sated.
雨水无情地打落在房子上，当我完成时，她已经吃饱了。

She may have hidden my mark on her neck but these ones she will carry until they heal and I inflict her with another.
她可能在她的脖子上藏了我的印记，但这些印记她会带着，直到它们痊愈，然后我再给她留下一个。

I watched her sleep peacefully for a while and when I became tired, I slipped out of the bed, wanting to be as far away from her as possible because the more I watched her, the more something primal etched its way deep into my chest.
我看着她安详地睡了一会儿，当我累了时，我从床上溜了下来，想尽可能地远离她，因为我越看她，就越有原始的东西深深地刻在我的胸膛里。

I wanted her… so much.
我想要她......这么多。

And at this point, I think I may love her too.
在这一点上，我想我可能也爱她。

7、

A loud cry was what woke the entire pack up the next morning… including me.
第二天早上，一声响亮的哭声把整个行李都吵醒了......包括我。

Jumping out of bed, I gathered the sheer material of my nightie around my body and rushed out of my room. I didn’t worry that I was dressed so scantily or that I wasn’t even wearing my flip flops as I had been scared that it was another rogue attack. However, as soon as I stepped out of the house, I was met with shock when I came face to face with a sad crowd already gathered outside.
我从床上跳下来，把睡衣的透明材料裹在身上，冲出了我的房间。我不担心我穿得这么暴露，甚至没有穿人字拖，因为我害怕这是另一次流氓袭击。然而，当我走出房子时，当我面对已经聚集在外面的悲伤人群时，我感到震惊。

I had no idea what was happening and there were no familiar faces around so I stood by a corner, watching with curiosity but just as I was about to step away, after deciding that this wasn’t my business, I heard it. The sound of someone wailing.
我不知道发生了什么，周围也没有熟悉的面孔，所以我站在一个角落里，好奇地看着，但就在我准备走开时，在确定这不关我的事之后，我听到了。有人哀嚎的声音。

My eyes snapped in the direction of the noise and I stilled when I saw that it was Sheila. She was crying hysterically as she held onto the body of a limp woman. I couldn’t see the woman’s face from up here but from how lifeless the body was, and judging from how Sheila was weeping uncontrollably, I immediately deduced that she was de*d. My heart fell.
我的眼睛猛地盯着声音的方向，当我看到是希拉时，我平静了下来。她抱着一个软绵绵的女人的身体，歇斯底里地哭涣。我从上面看不到那个女人的脸，但从尸体的死气沉沉的样子来看，再从希拉无法控制地哭泣的样子来看，我立刻推断出她已经死了。我的心沉了下来。

I had no idea who it was but I instantly became sad. I wanted to walk up to her, to console her but knowing who Sheila was and how much she hated me, I knew that that was a bad idea. She would stop at nothing to embarrass me even though all I wanted to do was make her feel better; so I shook my head as I stood rooted to the place and watched everything unfolding before me.
我不知道那是谁，但我立刻就伤心了。我想走到她面前，安慰她，但知道希拉是谁，她有多恨我，我知道这是一个坏主意。她会不惜一切代价让我难堪，即使我只想让她感觉好些;所以我摇了摇头，站在那个地方，看着眼前的一切展开。

What happened to her? Was she m*rdered by rogues, and is that why everyone’s gathered outside?
她怎么了？她是不是被流氓搞砸了，这就是大家都聚集在外面的原因吗？

However, I was snapped out of my thoughts when I heard the conversation between two girls standing not so far away from me. My ears perked up as I tried to eavesdrop but in a way that they wouldn’t realize I was and I pretended to wrap my bodice around myself as I shuffled closer to where they stood.
然而，当我听到站在离我不远的两个女孩之间的对话时，我被打断了。当我试图偷听时，我的耳朵竖了起来，但以一种他们不会意识到我的方式，我假装把我的紧身胸衣裹在自己身上，同时拖着脚走近他们站的地方。

“I heard that she di*d from poisoning.” One of the girls, the one closest to me with salty blonde hair, brown eyes and white round face said to the other. Her voice was barely above a whisper but because I was determined to eavesdrop, I heard her.
“我听说她死于中毒。”其中一个女孩，离我最近的那个，有着咸咸的金发，棕色的眼睛和白色的圆脸，对另一个说。她的声音勉强算是耳语，但因为我决心偷听，所以我听到了她的声音。

The other one who was a brunette gasped. She shuffled even closer to the blondie as she asked; “Really? Why would anyone po*son Lady Stephanie? She’s not known to have any enemies!”
另一个黑发女郎倒抽了一口气。她一边问一边拖着脚走得更近了;“真的吗？为什么有人会 po*son 斯蒂芬妮夫人？她不知道她有什么敌人！

Right then and there, my will to eavesdrop disappeared as my body began to shake in terror. Tears sprung into my eyes as I looked back at where Sheila sat on the floor wailing, with the de*d woman clasped in her arms. It was then that the woman’s features began to appear more familiar. It was then that I began to place who she was.
就在此时此地，我的窃听意愿消失了，我的身体开始在恐惧中颤抖。当我回头看着 Sheila 坐在地板上嚎啕大哭的地方，那个 de*d 女人紧紧地抱在怀里时，我的眼泪涌上了眼眶。就在那时，这个女人的五官开始显得更加熟悉。就在那时，我开始确定她是谁。

She was Lady Stephanie. The woman in the council and the same one I had gone to give medications to only yesterday on Tristan’s orders. She was the only one, besides Zade, that had treated me like one of their own, and now, thinking about her sudden demise shook something deep inside of me.
她是斯蒂芬妮夫人。委员会里的那个女人和我昨天才按照特里斯坦的命令去给她服药的那个女人。除了扎德之外，她是唯一一个把我当作自己的人一样对待的人，现在，想到她的突然去世，我内心深处的某个东西就受到了震撼。

“Hazel, you’re a good kid. Don’t let anyone change that about you.”
“Hazel，你是个好孩子。不要让任何人改变你的这一点。

Her last words echoed over and over again in my head until all I felt was a bleakness. A pain like never before, an emptiness. Fine, I haven’t known her for long but my encounter with her yesterday, and the time we spent together was more than enough for me to gauge her character. Tears spilled out of my eyes uncontrollably as I turned away from the crowd and from both of the girls to prevent anyone from seeing me cry.
她的最后一句话在我的脑海中一遍又一遍地回荡，直到我只感到一片凄凉。一种前所未有的痛苦，一种空虚。好吧，我认识她的时间不长，但我昨天与她的相遇，以及我们一起度过的时光，足以让我衡量她的性格。当我转身离开人群和两个女孩时，泪水不受控制地从我的眼眶中溢出，以防止任何人看到我哭泣。

Just then, Zade stepped out of the house looking all glorious in his sleepy hair, gray sweats that brought out his eyes and black checkered pants. When he saw the woman held in Sheila’s arms, he stilled. I saw something akin to pain flash through his gaze before he quickly masked it with his usual stoic look. He didn’t even glance in my direction as he barked;
就在这时，扎德走出了屋子，他睡眼惺忪的头发，灰色的汗水衬托着他的眼睛和黑色的格子裤，看起来光彩照人。当他看到 Sheila 怀里抱着的女人时，他安静了下来。我看到他的目光中闪过某种类似于痛苦的东西，然后他迅速用他一贯的坚忍表情掩盖了它。他吠叫时甚至没有看我一眼;

“What the hell happened?!” Causing the crowd to erupt into a wild frenzy.
“怎么了？！”让人群爆发出疯狂的情绪。

I heard him say something else to the crowd but I was too lost in my thoughts and too hurt to hear him. I remember promising Lady Stephanie yesterday that I would come to see her today, to help her out in the kitchen and to keep her company; but now, she was de*d and I still couldn’t believe it. It felt surreal, like something straight out of a movie, and the more I thought about it, the more confused and h*rt I became.
我听到他对人群说了些别的话，但我太迷失在自己的思绪中，太伤心了，听不见他的话。我记得昨天我答应斯蒂芬妮夫人，我今天会来看她，在厨房里帮她忙，陪她;但现在，她已经崩溃了，我仍然不敢相信。这感觉超现实，就像直接从电影中走出来一样，我想得越多，我就越困惑和困惑。

Who would po*son her? And why?
谁会对她下手呢？为什么呢？

Again, I was snapped out of my reverie when the crowd burst into angry yelling. I blinked as I turned to them to find out what was happening, but to my surprise, I noticed that they were all glaring at me with nothing but malice in their eyes. My breath hitched in my chest as I turned away, hoping that I was imagining it all. Alas, I wasn’t because when I turned back to them, they were still glaring at me. Only that they appeared extremely pissed this time. A few soldiers were holding some people back from… lunging at me?
再一次，当人群爆发出愤怒的吼叫时，我从遐想中醒来。我眨了眨眼，转向他们，想知道发生了什么，但令我惊讶的是，我注意到他们都瞪着我，眼中只有恶意。当我转身离开时，我的呼吸在胸口停滞，希望我正在想象这一切。唉，我不是，因为当我回头看他们时，他们仍然瞪着我。只是这次他们显得非常生气。一些士兵阻止了一些人......向我冲来？

Wait, what did I do?
等等，我做了什么？

“She should be kil*ed too!” I heard someone yell from the crowd whilst pointing a finger at me and I blinked in confusion.
“她也应该被杀掉！”我听到有人在人群中大喊大叫，同时用手指指着我，我困惑地眨了眨眼。

What the hell was happening?
这到底发生了什么事？

“Yes, she should! She’s a mole and a m*rderer! I am very certain that she’s been employed to kil* each and everyone of us, one after the other!” Another person yelled and I tried to block out most of their harsh words until one spoke;
“是的，她应该！她是个鼹鼠和个混蛋！我非常确定她是受雇来照顾我们每一个人，一个接一个的！另一个人大喊大叫，我试图屏蔽他们大部分的严厉话语，直到一个人开口;

“Isn’t she Alpha Derek’s daughter?! She’s the enemy and should be kil*ed!”
“她不是 Alpha Derek 的女儿吗？！她是敌人，应该被杀掉！

And to that, everyone began to yell and curse at me. I knew now that they all abhorred me more than they ever did, and it hurt. I tried to duck my head and step out of the place back into the house but to my surprise, two soldiers stepped in, obstructing my path.
“于是，每个人都开始对我大喊大叫和咒骂。我现在知道他们都比以往任何时候都更憎恨我，这很伤人。我试图低下头，走出这个地方回到房子里，但令我惊讶的是，两个士兵走了进来，挡住了我的去路。

I looked up at them and whispered; “hey, move. Let me in.” But they wouldn’t budge. Even Zade who had obviously heard me said nothing. He didn’t ask them to step away and he wouldn’t even look at me. His reaction above everyone else’s made me hurt and I frowned, wondering what this was all about.
我抬头看着他们，低声说;“嘿，移动。让我进来。但他们不会让步。就连显然听到了我的扎德也没说什么。他没有让他们走开，他甚至不看我一眼。他的反应比其他人都要好，这让我很受伤，我皱起眉头，想知道这到底是怎么回事。

Have these people suddenly become so crazy to the extent that everything that happens in their pack now automatically becomes my fault?
这些人是不是突然变得如此疯狂，以至于他们群体中发生的一切都自动成为我的错？

I opened my mouth, ready to spit out that question until I realized what was making them this mad, and how I had gotten myself in this situation. I had been with Lady Stephanie for most of yesterday. I had helped her to dinner and even tucked her into bed. If anyone was to be suspected for her m*rder then it had to be me. My heart plummeted in my chest as I searched through the angry crowd at Tristan, and behold, he was there, talking to an elder in hushed tones. When he saw me watching, he shook his head as if in pity and looked away.
我张开嘴，准备吐出这个问题，直到我意识到是什么让他们如此生气，以及我是怎么让自己陷入这种情况的。昨天大部分时间我都和斯蒂芬妮夫人在一起。我帮她吃晚饭，甚至把她哄睡在床上。如果有人怀疑她是 m*rder，那一定是我。当我在愤怒的人群中寻找特里斯坦时，我的心在胸口猛然一跳，看啊，他就在那里，正在和一位长老小声交谈。当他看到我在看时，他摇了摇头，似乎很怜悯，然后把目光移开了。

It all happened so quickly but I was sure I saw something akin to a smirk play across his lips before he turned away. I wasn’t sure so I made my way to Zade, only to be stopped again by the two soldiers.
这一切都发生得太快了，但我确信在他转身离开之前，我看到他的嘴唇上露出了类似得意的笑容。我不确定，所以我去了扎德，却又被两个士兵拦住了。

“Excuse me, let me pass!” I seethed, pushing at one of their burly chests but he didn’t move away. Zade didn’t turn to look at me. “Please let me pass! I didn’t do anything to Lady Stephanie and I do not understand why you’re all treating me like this!” I cried out but no one listened.
“对不起，让我过去！”我怒火中烧，推搡着他们魁梧的胸膛，但他并没有移开。扎德没有转头看我。“请让我过去！我没有对斯蒂芬妮夫人做任何事情，我不明白为什么你们都这样对待我！我大声呼喊，但没有人听。

Something about my words even made the crowd angrier and while some tried to charge at me, the others began throwing things in my direction, ranging from rocks to even their footwear. Tears poured out of my eyes and when I had begun to surrender to my fate, seeing as I couldn’t get out of this one, Zade’s voice rang out;
我的话甚至让人群更加愤怒，当一些人试图向我冲锋时，其他人开始向我的方向扔东西，从石头到他们的鞋子。泪水从我的眼眶中涌出，当我开始向命运屈服时，眼看着我无法摆脱命运，扎德的声音响了起来;

“ENOUGH!” He yelled. His voice was so loud and so powerful that I could swear that I felt the ground shake underneath me. He pointed at the crowd, and with the angriest sneer I’ve ever seen on his face, he growled; “No one is allowed to accuse her or do anything to her until she’s proven guilty… and we can only know that after proper investigations. Do you understand me?!”
“够了！”他大喊。他的声音是如此响亮，如此有力，以至于我可以发誓，我感觉到我脚下的地面在震动。他指着人群，脸上带着我见过的最愤怒的冷笑，咆哮着;“在她被证明有罪之前，任何人都不允许指控她或对她做任何事情......我们只有在适当的调查之后才能知道这一点。你明白我的话吗？！

“Yes Alpha!” Most of the people yelled back, but from the looks on their faces and how they grumbled, I knew they only responded out of respect for Zade. They all thought I was Lady Stephanie’s murderer and if he wasn’t here, maybe I would’ve been kil*ed by now too.
“是的，Alpha！”大多数人都大喊大叫，但从他们脸上的表情和抱怨的样子来看，我知道他们只是出于对扎德的尊重才做出回应。他们都认为我是杀害斯蒂芬妮夫人的凶手，如果他不在这里，也许我现在也会被杀害。

“Now, for all of you who threw things at her, you’ve disrespected me by doing so. Whether there’s a m*rder allegation hanging over her head or not, she remains my guest! And for that, you’ll be punished!” He added, and this time, the crowd went very silent. No one said anything or even moved, and seizing this moment, Zade continued;
“现在，对于所有向她扔东西的人，你们这样做是对我的不尊重。无论是否有 m*rder 指控悬在她的头上，她仍然是我的客人！为此，你会受到惩罚的！“他补充说，这一次，人群变得非常安静。没有人说什么，甚至没有动，抓住这个时刻，扎德继续说;

“As for you Hazel…” Now, he turned to me and my heart dropped when I saw that there was nothing but contempt sizzling in his gray orbs. Gone were the passion and fire… and desire I used to see in his eyes. Whatever was left in there now was strictly business. Strictly his will to serve and protect his pack.
“至于你，Hazel......“现在，他转向我，当我看到他的灰色球体中只有轻蔑的嘶嘶声时，我的心都沉了下来。激情和火焰已经消失了......我曾经在他的眼睛里看到过欲望。现在，那里剩下的一切都是真正的事情。严格来说，他要服侍和保护他的狼群。

And come to think of it, I was not a member of his pack.
仔细想想，我不是他的一员。

“…you’ll be locked up in a cell while we begin to investigate this case, and you’ll remain there until enough evidence is gathered to either prove your innocence or charge you with. And if proven guilty, you’ll be executed on this same spot.” He finished, causing the crowd to erupt into wild jubilation.
“…在我们开始调查此案期间，您将被关在牢房中，您将一直呆在那里，直到收集到足够的证据来证明您的清白或指控您。如果被证明有罪，你将在同一个地点被处决。他说完，让人群爆发出狂野的欢呼声。

My heart shattered into a million pieces as I watched him. But I couldn’t go down without a fight. Ignoring the two soldiers blocking my path, I reached for Zade and grabbed onto his shirt. I didn’t even give him a chance to react as I immediately went on my knees and cried; “I didn’t murder her. I only took drugs to her on Sir Tristan’s orders! I swear, I didn’t do anything to her!”
当我看着他时，我的心碎成了一百万块。但我不能不战而降。我无视挡住我去路的两个士兵，伸手抓住了扎德，抓住了他的衬衫。我什至没有给他反应的机会，我立即跪下哭泣;“我没有谋杀她。我只是按照特里斯坦爵士的命令给她带药的！我发誓，我没有对她做任何事情！

“Then how do you explain being the last person to see her yesterday, only for her to be de*d this morning?” He whispered, bending his head as he looked down at me.
“那你怎么解释我是昨天最后一个见到她的人，今天早上却让她被带走了？”他低声说，低头看着我。

Tears stung my eyes and I didn’t bother to wipe my face clean. I was hurt, scared… and innocent. I didn’t even know what else to say to him so I resorted to saying the same thing I’d been saying earlier. I cried; “I didn’t hurt her. Hell, I could never! I met Tristan at the hospital and he asked me to take some medicine to her house!”
泪水刺痛了我的眼睛，我懒得擦干净脸。我受伤了，害怕了......而且是无辜的。我什至不知道还能对他说什么，所以我只好说了我之前说过的话。我喊道;“我没有伤害她。妈的，我永远都做不到！我在医院遇到了特里斯坦，他让我带点药到她家去！

“We’ll know for sure once we carry out proper investigation, Hazel, but for now, you need to be taken away.” He answered stiffly.
“一旦我们进行适当的调查，我们就会确定，Hazel，但现在，你需要被带走。”他生硬地回答。

When he turned away this time, he didn’t spare a glance at me. He merely flicked his wrist at the soldiers who in turn picked me up and began to drag me away, and while they did, all I could do was cry. I had nothing else to say and if Zade doesn’t believe me, then who else would?
这一次他转过身去，没有看我一眼。他只是向士兵们轻弹手腕，这些士兵反过来把我抱起来，开始把我拖走，当他们这样做时，我所能做的就是哭泣。我没有什么可说的了，如果 Zade 不相信我，那还有谁会相信呢？

This thought plagued me so much but despite myself, I couldn’t help but think back to Tristan and his behavior earlier. I believed that he was the architect of my misfortunes and at this point, it was safe to assume that he masterminded all of these.
这个想法让我非常困扰，但尽管我自己，我还是忍不住回想起特里斯坦和他之前的行为。我相信他是我不幸的设计师，在这一点上，可以肯定地假设他策划了这一切。

Was I sure? No. But I would do anything to prove my innocence.
我确定吗？不。但我愿意做任何事情来证明我的清白。

8、

That was the feeling I had grown accustomed to in these past few days, and right now, it was all I could feel. I was mad. Mad at Hazel, My Hazel, for being the mole we’ve all been looking for ever since, and mad at myself for being carried away by her charm, our past, the mate bond and everything else.
那是我在过去几天里已经习惯的感觉，而现在，这就是我所能感受到的。我很生气。对 Hazel 生气，我的 Hazel，因为我从那时起就是我们一直在寻找的内奸，也对我自己被她的魅力、我们的过去、伴侣关系和其他一切冲昏头脑而生气。

I wiped my face with a towel as I glared at the papers in front of me. It was the paperwork on Hazel’s case which had been put together by members of the council. It wasn’t necessary but it was obvious that their intention was to get her kil*ed. The paperwork mostly contained information linking her to the rogue attack that happened several days ago, and according to them, we’ve never had an attack like that until she came into the pack. It also contained testimonies from Lady Stephanie’s neighbors and quite frankly, a lot of them sounded exaggerated to me.
我用毛巾擦了擦脸，瞪着面前的报纸。这是委员会成员整理的关于 Hazel 案件的文件。这不是必要的，但很明显，他们的意图是让她湿漉漉的。这些文件主要包含将她与几天前发生的流氓袭击联系起来的信息，据他们说，在她出现之前，我们从未发生过这样的袭击。它还包含斯蒂芬妮夫人邻居的证词，坦率地说，其中很多在我看来听起来都有些夸张。

“Are you even listening to me?” Tristan’s voice snapped me out of my train of thought and I blinked as I looked up at him, who in turn was watching me with something akin to amusement dancing across his eyes.
“你有在听我说话吗？”特里斯坦的声音把我从思路中打断，我眨了眨眼，抬头看着他，而他又用一种类似于娱乐的东西看着我。

“No.” I replied blatantly. “I wasn’t listening to you because I was carried away by something else entirely. What were you saying?”
“不。”我明目张胆地回答。“我没有听你的话，因为我完全被其他事情冲昏了头脑。你在说什么？

Tristan sighed as he sank deeper into his chair. And then he smiled. Truthfully, I liked him a lot, as much as I could, but there were times, times like now, when I wanted nothing more than to get him out of my sight. I knew that even though we hadn’t had a conversation about Hazel yet, he knew about her and the relationship I had with her, so it was annoying that right now, the only thing he could do was smile when I was literally going through a roller coaster of emotions. I was torn between upholding my integrity and putting my pack first, or putting my love life first and losing it all. And he wasn’t helping.
特里斯坦叹了口气，深深地陷入了椅子。然后他笑了。说实话，我非常喜欢他，尽可能地喜欢他，但有时候，像现在这样的时候，我只想把他从我的视线中赶出去。我知道，即使我们还没有谈论过 Hazel，他也知道她和我与她的关系，所以现在很烦人，当我真的在经历情绪的过山车时，他唯一能做的就是微笑。我在维护我的诚信和把我的包放在第一位，还是把我的爱情生活放在第一位并失去这一切之间左右为难。他没有帮忙。

“I was talking about how the members of our pack have been clamoring for justice,” he said, managing to rile me up even more. “Apparently, a lot of people saw her leave Lady Stephanie's house, her neighbors informed us that after the rogue left, no one went in until this morning that Sheila found her dead.”
“我说的是我们的狼群成员是如何叫嚣着伸张正义的，”他说，设法让我更加愤怒。“显然，很多人看到她离开了斯蒂芬妮夫人的房子，她的邻居告诉我们，流氓离开后，没有人进来，直到今天早上希拉发现她死了。”

“So Sheila was there as well?” I asked and to this, Tristan nodded. Right there and then, another thought fleeted past my mind and without thinking it through, I let it slip out of my mouth, I asked;
“所以希拉也在那儿？”我问道，特里斯坦点了点头。就在这时，另一个想法从我的脑海中闪过，我没有想清楚，就让它从我的嘴里溜走了，我问道;

“Why didn’t anyone tell me that Sheila was there? And if she was, then why’s she not being investigated right now as well?” And at that, Tristan gasped.
“为什么没有人告诉我希拉在那里？如果她是，那为什么她现在没有接受调查呢？听到这话，特里斯坦倒抽了一口气。

“You’d rather let Sheila, a respected member of this pack, be investigated than the rogue?” He asked with a note of incredulity lacing his words. I shook my head in frustration, not only at the fact that he was intentionally mincing my words, but also because I felt he was doing all of these to force me into telling him more than I wanted to.
“你宁愿让希拉，这个群体中受人尊敬的成员，而不是那个流氓？”他问道，话语中带着一丝怀疑。我沮丧地摇了摇头，不仅因为他故意吝啬我的话，还因为我觉得他做这一切是为了强迫我告诉他比我想说的更多。

I spat; “She’s one of the last people to see Lady Stephanie and I believe that it’s only logical that she’s taken in for questioning as well.”
我啐了一口;“她是最后见到斯蒂芬妮夫人的人之一，我相信她也被带去接受审问是合乎逻辑的。”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Zade!” Tristan snarled, rising to his feet. “In case you’ve forgotten, late Lady Stephanie was Sheila’s aunt and right now, Sheila is in mourning! It’s inconsiderate to question someone in her state right now.”
“别荒谬了，扎德！”特里斯坦咆哮着，站了起来。“如果你忘记了，已故的斯蒂芬妮夫人是希拉的姑姑，现在，希拉正在哀悼中！现在质问她所在州的人是不体贴的。

Tristan’s whole reaction had me gaping at him in surprise. He has always been one to put logic before sentiment, and today, seeing that he was doing the exact opposite of that has me thinking a lot of weird thoughts. I sunk deeper into my chair as I glared up at him, and with an evil smirk playing on my lips, I bit out;
特里斯坦的整个反应让我惊讶地目瞪口呆地看着他。他一直是一个将逻辑置于情感之前的人，而今天，看到他正在做与此完全相反的事情，我开始思考很多奇怪的想法。我瞪着他，深深地陷在椅子上，嘴角露出邪恶的笑容，我咬了一口;

“I don’t care. All I care about right now is finding the perpetrator of this horrible crime so while Hazel is being investigated, I want Sheila and every of Lady Stephanie’s neighbors to be taken for questioning as well.”
“我不在乎。我现在关心的是找到这起可怕罪行的肇事者，所以在调查 Hazel 的同时，我希望 Sheila 和 Stephanie 夫人的每一位邻居也被带去审问。

This time, Tristan visibly reeled from shock. “Wow,” he muttered, “you’re really doing all you can to vindicate the rogue.”
这一次，特里斯坦明显因震惊而感到震惊。“哇，”他咕哝道，“你真的在尽你所能为这个流氓辩护。

“Well, the ‘rogue’ has a name and it is Hazel. Also, I am not doing all of these to vindicate her but I cannot just bring myself to order her execution simply because a few people wagged their tongues. She might be innocent, but if she’s found guilty, then I promise you, her head would roll.”
“嗯，那个'流氓'有个名字，叫黑泽尔。 此外，我做这一切并不是为了为她平反，但我不能仅仅因为几个人摇头晃脑就下令处决她。她可能是无辜的，但如果她被判有罪，那么我向你保证，她的脑袋会翻滚的。

“At this point, I am sure that even you doubt that.” He spat, and with that, he stormed out of my office, leaving me staring after him in shock.
“在这一点上，我敢肯定，即使是你也会怀疑这一点。”他啐了一口，然后冲出了我的办公室，留下我震惊地盯着他。

I had a vague idea of what he meant by his last statement but deciding to let it slide, I picked up the paper in front of me and began to scan through its content. The paperwork was thrash and the motive behind it was even worse. If this was what every member of my pack thought of Hazel, then there was trouble because every single atrocity that had been committed in the past month now was being linked to her; be it theft, the unsolved Antonio’s case, the rogue attack, a problem at the borders, and Lady Stephanie’s death. A sigh escaped my lips as I plopped the paper back onto the table and leaned away.
我模糊地知道他最后这句话的含义，但还是决定放手一搏，我拿起面前的纸，开始浏览它的内容。文书工作很糟糕，背后的动机更糟糕。如果这就是我团队中每个成员对 Hazel 的看法，那么就有麻烦了，因为过去一个月犯下的每一次暴行现在都与她有关;无论是盗窃、未解决的安东尼奥案、流氓袭击、边境问题以及斯蒂芬妮夫人的死亡。我叹了口气，把纸放回桌子上，靠了过去。

Just then, a thought occurred to me and no matter how hard I tried to shake it off, I just couldn’t. I couldn’t help but wonder if all of these were true. If Hazel was indeed the mastermind behind everything. I wondered if everything was a plot and she was still set out to kill me.
就在这时，我突然想到一个想法，无论我多么努力地摆脱它，我就是无法摆脱它。我不禁想知道这些是否都是真的。如果 Hazel 真的是这一切的幕后黑手。我想知道是不是一切都是阴谋，她仍然打算杀了我。

Was this an arrangement between her and her father? And was I gullible to allow her into my pack despite the way we met?
这是她和她父亲之间的安排吗？尽管我们以这种方式相遇，我还是会轻信她进入我的背包吗？

As these thoughts plagued my mind, I became more and more paranoid, and I was only snapped out of it when I heard a knock on the door.
这些想法困扰着我的脑海，我变得越来越偏执，直到听到敲门声时，我才被吓了一跳。

Thinking that Tristan was back, I sat up and snapped; “Come in!” Surprised when instead, Eva, the pack’s doctor, came in.
我以为特里斯坦回来了，坐起来，啪啪作响;“进来！”令她惊讶的是，这群人的医生伊娃却进来了。

“Alpha,” she greeted with her head slightly bowed. I noticed the two large envelopes in her hands and with my sight set only on them, I said; “Sit… and please tell me why you are here, Eva.”
“Alpha，”她微微低下头打招呼。我注意到她手里拿着两个大信封，我的眼睛只盯着它们，我说;“坐下......请告诉我你为什么在这里，伊娃。

Doctor Eva immediately sat on the chair in front of mine as she slid one of the envelopes to me. She didn’t wait for me to pull whatever was inside out as she began to say; “That is Lady Stephanie’s autopsy report.”
Eva 医生立即坐在我面前的椅子上，同时将其中一个信封滑到我面前。她没等我把里面的东西拉出来，她就开始说了;“那是斯蒂芬妮夫人的尸检报告。”

Her words made me still my actions as I glared between her and the manilla envelope in front of me. Now, I was afraid to pull it open in fear of what I might find inside as I knew that it may end up implicating Hazel even more. My heart thudded in my chest as I slowly broke the seal and pulled out a large report sheet but after reading through it for about three minutes, I decided then that I had no idea about the scientific jargon that was written in it.
她的话让我静止了自己的行动，我瞪着她和我面前的马尼拉信封。现在，我害怕把它拉开，因为害怕我会在里面发现什么，因为我知道它最终可能会对 Hazel 产生更大的影响。当我慢慢解开封条并拿出一份大报告表时，我的心砰砰直跳，但在阅读了大约三分钟后，我决定我对上面写的科学术语一无所知。

“I do not understand anything here.” I stated quite frankly, noticing how Eva smiled forlornly before she continued.
“我在这里什么都不懂。”我相当坦率地说，注意到 Eva 在继续之前露出了悲哀的笑容。

“It shows that Lady Stephanie was indeed po*soned.” She said, causing my eyes to widen in shock. “However, it also showed that she ingested drugs laced with silver and morphine sulphate, and I have no idea how that came to be.”
“这表明斯蒂芬妮夫人确实很有名气。”她说，让我震惊地睁大了眼睛。“然而，它也表明她摄入了掺有银和硫酸吗啡的药物，我不知道这是怎么回事。”

“Were there any signs of struggle… any indication that she must’ve fought or struggled with whoever gave her those pills?” I found myself asking even though I had no idea why. I still couldn’t believe that Hazel would do something like this, and maybe this was my way of blocking it all out, my way of looking for ways to get her out even though it seemed like there was none at this point.
“有没有挣扎的迹象......有没有迹象表明她一定和给她那些药丸的人打架或挣扎过？我发现自己在问，尽管我不知道为什么。我仍然不敢相信 Hazel 会做出这样的事情，也许这就是我阻止这一切的方式，我寻找让她出去的方法，即使此时看起来没有。

Doctor Eva shook her head at me. “She seemed to have d*ed a peaceful d*ath.” She answered, “Also, I’ve asked for the retrieval of the remaining drugs from her home and I'd like for you to give me the permission to take them, as well as test them.”
Eva 医生对我摇摇头。“她似乎过得很平静。”她回答说：“另外，我已经要求从她家里取回剩余的药物，我希望你允许我服用它们，并对其进行测试。

“Permission granted.” I quickly responded with a flick of my wrist. I was just about to dismiss her when another thought occurred to me, I muttered; “…and do not tell anyone about this… not even my brother until the results of the drug testing are out.”
“已授予许可。”我迅速地轻弹了一下手腕。我正要打发她，这时我又想到了另一个想法，我咕哝道;“…不要告诉任何人这件事......在药检结果出来之前，即使是我哥哥也不行。

“Yes Alpha.”
“是的，Alpha。”

“You may leave now.” I commanded her but to my surprise, she didn’t. Instead, she passed the second envelope across the table and folded her arms across her chest.
“你现在可以走了。”我命令她，但令我惊讶的是，她没有。相反，她把第二个信封递过桌子，双臂交叉在胸前。

I glanced between her and the offensive object for a few minutes and when she wouldn’t budge or leave, I begrudgingly picked it up and began to rip off its seal. “What’s this about? Lady Stephanie as well?” I asked her but she only shook her head, refusing to say anything more.
我在她和那个冒犯性物体之间瞥了一眼几分钟，当她不肯动弹或离开时，我不情愿地捡起它并开始撕开它的封条。“这是怎么回事？斯蒂芬妮夫人也是吗？我问她，但她只是摇摇头，拒绝再说什么。

In annoyance, I pulled out the white report sheet and scanned through. I saw a lot of more scientific gibberish in it but the only thing that stood out this time was Hazel’s name. This was Hazel’s medical reports and not Lady Stephanie’s. I slapped the paper on the table and with my arms folded across my chest, I snarled;
我懊恼地拿出白色的成绩单，扫了一遍。我在其中看到了很多更多的科学胡言乱语，但这次唯一突出的是 Hazel 的名字。这是 Hazel 的医疗报告，而不是 Stephanie 夫人的。我把纸拍在桌子上，双臂交叉在胸前，咆哮着;

“You know that I do not understand any of that.”
“你知道我什么都不懂。”

“Yes, I know,” Eva responded and with a smile, she continued; “however, I wanted you to see it for yourself at least.”
“是的，我知道，”伊娃回答道，她微笑着继续说;“不过，我希望你至少能亲眼看看。”

“What am I seeing for myself? Does she have a terminal disease or something?” I spat out, instantly regretting it due to the way my heart squeezed painfully in my chest at the thought.
“我自己看到了什么？她得了绝症还是别的什么？我吐了一口唾沫，立刻后悔了，因为想到这个想法，我的心就痛苦地挤压着我的胸口。

As if noticing my reaction, Eva shook her head and said; “No, she isn’t sick at all, Alpha. Actually, she’s pregnant.”
似乎注意到了我的反应，伊娃摇了摇头说;“不，她根本没病，Alpha。实际上，她怀孕了。

My entire world seemed to end right there and then. Everything stilled, including my breath and my heartbeat. I stared at Doctor Eva for the longest minute, unsure of what to say or do. I didn’t even need to know for how long she was pregnant because deep down, I knew that I was responsible. Hell, I had taken her virginity during our first intercourse! So she was as pure as one could be.
我的整个世界似乎就在那时结束了。一切都静止了，包括我的呼吸和心跳。我盯着Eva医生看了很久，不知道该说什么或做什么。我什至不需要知道她怀孕了多长时间，因为在内心深处，我知道我有责任。的，我在我们第一次时夺走了她的童贞！所以她是尽可能的纯洁。

My jaws ticked as I listened to Doctor Eva rant on and on about how the pregnancy was the reason behind Hazel’s sudden body weakness and her fainting but I paid no attention. All I deduced from everything she had been saying was the fact that My Lavender was three weeks gone and I was certain that the child was mine.
当我听着 Eva 医生不停地咆哮着怀孕是 Hazel 突然身体虚弱和昏厥的原因时，我的下巴滴答作响，但我没有注意。我从她所说的一切中推断出，我的薰衣草已经消失了三个星期，我确信这个孩子是我的。

“Is there anything else you’d like me to do?” She asked, snapping me out of my reverie and I shook my head as I dismissed her.
“你还有什么想让我做的吗？”她问道，把我从遐想中拉了出来，我摇了摇头，打发了她。

Shortly afterwards, Doctor Eva left, leaving both envelopes behind and I couldn’t help but pick the one containing Hazel’s test results up. Now, I was beyond confused; I had no idea what to do but now it was certain that I couldn’t leave her in the cell while a growing fetus was inside of her. That and the fact that the fetus was also mine.
不久之后，Eva 医生离开了，留下了两个信封，我忍不住拿起了装有 Hazel 测试结果的信封。现在，我感到非常困惑;我不知道该怎么办，但现在可以肯定的是，我不能把她留在牢房里，因为她体内有一个正在发育的胎儿。而且胎儿也是我的。

My hands shook with the paper in it and after long moments of deliberation, I finally came to a conclusion.
我的手拿着纸颤抖着，经过长时间的思考，我终于得出了一个结论。

Fu*k the Council and every member of my pack, I wasn’t going to allow anyone touch Hazel whether she kil*ed Lady Stephanie or brought the rogues here, or not. I would think of new ways to have her punished but for now, her health was my priority.
去他妈的议会和我背包的每一个成员，我不会允许任何人碰 Hazel，无论她是否杀死了 Stephanie 夫人或将流氓带到了这里。我会想办法让她受到惩罚，但就目前而言，她的健康是我的首要任务。

She was my priority.
她是我的首要任务。

9、

I woke up to the sound of metal doors opening in the distance and prying my eyes open, I was surprised when I was met with… darkness. I opened my mouth to speak but then I couldn’t because there was something stuffed into my mouth and my throat was so dry, it felt like it was about to burn.
我被远处金属门打开的声音惊醒，撬开眼睛，当我遇到时，我感到很惊讶......黑暗。我张开嘴想说话，但后来我不能说话，因为嘴里塞了什么东西，我的喉咙很干，感觉就像快要燃烧一样。

I didn’t know what time of the day it was due to the blindfold on my eyes and sure enough, just as I thought about that and soon began to hyperventilate, my nostrils were hit with a very familiar scent, one that was enough to send chills down my spine before the blindfold was forcefully ripped off my face.
我不知道是什么时候，因为我的眼睛被蒙住了，果然，就在我想到这一点并很快开始过度换气时，我的鼻孔被一种非常熟悉的气味击中，这种气味足以让我的脊椎发凉，然后眼罩被强行从我的脸上扯下来。

I winced in pain from the sting. Even tears sprung into my eyes too. However, I didn’t get enough time to dwell on the pain as I was soon met with Tristan’s dark scorching gaze when I lifted my head. Now, he looked more like the maniac that I always suspected that he was. His long hair that was usually framing his face was now tied back into a ponytail revealing his sharp features and crazed eyes. While he advanced toward me, I noticed that there was a small shiny d*gger in his hands but surprisingly, that didn’t scare me. What scared me was the look in his eyes. It was savage… brutal. It was blank. Tristan is a brute.
我被刺痛得皱起了眉头。甚至我的眼泪也涌上了眼眶。然而，我没有足够的时间去思考痛苦，因为当我抬起头时，我很快就遇到了特里斯坦黑暗灼热的目光。现在，他看起来更像我一直怀疑的那个疯子。他平时遮住脸庞的长发现在扎成马尾辫，露出他尖锐的五官和疯狂的眼睛。当他向我走来时，我注意到他手里拿着一个闪闪发光的小瓶子，但令人惊讶的是，这并没有吓到我。让我害怕的是他的眼神。太野蛮了......残暴的。它是空白的。特里斯坦是个畜生。

He smiled- more like bared his teeth- at me when he saw me watching and with a small tilt of his head, he muttered; “Ahh, I see that you’re awake!”
当他看到我看着我时，他对我微笑——更像是露出牙齿——他微微歪着头，咕哝道;“啊，我看到你醒了！”

“That I am.” I replied coldly. I could feel the presence of someone behind me but due to how tightly I was bound to the metal chair, I couldn’t turn around to see who it was. Ignoring the panic that was stemming at the back of my mind at the prospect of being suddenly attacked, I turned back to Tristan and bit out; “What is this?”
“就是我。”我冷冷地回答。我能感觉到有人在我身后，但由于我被紧紧地绑在金属椅子上，我无法转身看清是谁。我无视了心中对突然遭到袭击的恐惧，转身看向特里斯坦，咬了一口;“这是什么？”

He smiled then, stopping a few meters away from me to cross his arms over his chest. There wasn’t even a tiny bit of humor on his face when he said; “This is me helping you out.”
然后他笑了，在离我几米远的地方停了下来，双臂交叉在胸前。他说的时候，他的脸上甚至没有一丝幽默;“这是我帮你。”

A chill ran up my spine at his words but deciding to clamp it down, I watched him, listening while he continued to speak. “Obviously, you were trying to run off so I helped you. Now, you won't just run, you’ll disappear for good.”
听到他的话，我的脊背发凉，但我决定压制住它，我看着他，听着他继续说话。“显然，你是想逃跑，所以我帮了你。现在，你不仅会逃跑，还会永远消失。

“Where am I?” I asked then but before he could answer, the person behind me stepped out to whisper something into Tristan’s ear before marching off, and as soon as I saw the person, I stilled. Mind you, I wasn’t so shocked because I knew who it was, if anything, I had never seen that person before in my entire life. However, I was shocked because of the person’s clothing, or should I say uniform? He was a soldier alright, and he was clad in the uniform of my father’s soldiers!
“我在哪儿？”然后我问道，但还没等他回答，我后面的人就走了出来，在特里斯坦的耳边低语了些什么，然后走开了，我一看到那个人，就安静了下来。请注意，我并没有那么震惊，因为我知道那个人是谁，如果有的话，我这辈子从未见过那个人。然而，我因为这个人的衣着而感到震惊，还是应该说制服？他还是个士兵，而且他穿着我父亲的士兵的制服！

My jaws dropped as I stared between Tristan and the retreating soldier. It was obvious that he instantly knew what I was looking at because then he beamed a smile at me.
当我盯着特里斯坦和撤退的士兵之间时，我的下巴掉了下来。很明显，他立刻就知道我在看什么，因为然后他对我微笑。

“There are a lot of things that you do not know, cupcake.” He mused. “So, you were asking about something?”
“有很多事情你不知道，纸杯蛋糕。”他沉思着。“所以，你刚才问了什么？”

I ignored him then, deciding not to engage him as my mind was preoccupied with several other thoughts but soon I was snapped out of my reverie when Tristan’s voice rang out. He spat; “you see, I always used to wonder how I would kidnap you from Zade’s chamber without looking suspicious, until you helped me out by running off.”
然后我没有理会他，决定不和他打交道，因为我的脑子里全神贯注于其他几个想法，但很快我就被特里斯坦的声音从遐想中惊醒了。他啐了一口;“你看，我以前总是在想，我是怎么把你从扎德的房间里绑架出来而不显得可疑的，直到你帮我跑掉。”

My mouth fell open as I looked at him in shock. “And what do you want from me?”
我震惊地看着他，张大了嘴巴。“那你想从我这里得到什么？”

Tristan shrugged then. His eyes were like dark clouds as he regarded me. He glanced briefly at the wristwatch on his wrist before looking up to beam another exaggerated smile at me. “I want nothing from you… but I know someone who wants everything from you.” He said, causing my face to scrunch up in confusion. After he said that, he turned away and without looking at me, he continued;
特里斯坦耸了耸肩。他的眼睛像乌云一样看着我。他短暂地看了一眼手腕上的手表，然后抬起头来，对我露出另一个夸张的微笑。“我从你这里什么都不要......但我知道有人想从你这里得到一切。他说，让我的脸困惑地皱了起来。“说完，他转过身去，没有看我一眼，继续说;

“All I wanted was to convict you of a crime Anne make sure you get kil*ed for it… but now, that’s no longer the case.”
“我只想给你定罪，安妮，确保你因此而被罚下......但现在，情况不再如此。

I frowned. I wanted to ask him what he meant by that but before the words could leave my mouth, he crouched in front of me. He placed both of his hands on my knees and pressed them against the chair with so much force that made it quite difficult for me to move. I winced when his fingers dug into my knees but before I could cry out, Tristan continued yapping;
我皱起眉头。我想问他这是什么意思，但话还没说出口，他就蹲在我面前。他把双手放在我的膝盖上，用很大的力气把它们压在椅子上，使我很难动弹。当他的手指探入我的膝盖时，我畏缩了一下，但在我喊出之前，特里斯坦继续吼叫;

“Lady Stephanie… I killed her and framed you for her mu*der. You see, I was in charge of keeping drugs and the medicine budget of the pack last year which kinda made me have access to a whole lot of medicines around the pack, so when the nurse gave me her medications, I didn’t do shit and simply gave it to you. And then I waited until night time to pay her a lil visit where I swapped both medicine containers.”
“斯蒂芬妮夫人......我杀了她，陷害你成为她的坏蛋。你看，去年我负责保管药物和药物预算，这让我可以接触到很多药物，所以当护士给我她的药物时，我没有做任何事情，只是给你。然后我等到晚上才去看望她，在那里我交换了两个药瓶。

The way he said it with a giggle made my blood run cold. I was speechless and worst of all, I was scared. If Tristan was telling me something like this then it was obvious that he wouldn’t allow me to live long enough to tell another person about it.
他咯咯笑着说这话的方式让我的血液都冷了下来。我说不出话来，最糟糕的是，我很害怕。如果特里斯坦对我说了这样的事情，那么很明显他不会让我活得足够长，以至于不能告诉另一个人。

I sat up straight without flinching even as the silver chains dug into my skin. Deep down, I was in a turmoil. Even my entire body was shaking so much, it was difficult to hold still. But I didn’t allow Tristan to see this. I couldn’t afford to show him weakness and so I said; “What do you want from me now?”
我坐直了身子，即使银色的锁链深深地钻进了我的皮肤，我也没有退缩。在内心深处，我陷入了混乱。甚至我的整个身体都在颤抖，很难保持静止。但我没有让 Tristan 看到这一点。我不能让他示弱，所以我说;“你现在想从我这里得到什么？”

“Oh nothing!” He snapped, “…do not delude yourself by thinking that I’d ever want anything from you, wench. All I have ever wanted was to replace Zade. For a long time, my wish has only ever been to become Alpha but you know what? I cannot, as long as He’s alive. It’s unfair that everyone assumes I am not qualified to be the Alpha King because I was the son born to our father outside of wedlock… a product of a secret affair that my father had with another woman.”
“哦，没什么！”他厉声说，“......不要自欺欺人地认为我永远都想从你这里得到什么，老兄。我一直想要的就是取代 Zade。很长一段时间以来，我的愿望一直是成为 Alpha，但你知道吗？只要他还活着，我就不能。每个人都认为我没有资格成为阿尔法国王，因为我是我们父亲的非婚生子，这是不公平的......这是我父亲与另一个女人秘密恋情的产物。“

Tristan licked his lips manically as he stepped away from me and I couldn’t help but shiver in fear whenever his eyes met with mine. Seeing that I did not interrupt him, he continued with his rant; “… but Zade, the bastard was good at his job, it was very difficult to fault him. I always sought ways to drag him down but I never found one until now.”
特里斯坦在离开我时疯狂地舔了舔嘴唇，每当他的目光与我的眼睛相遇时，我都忍不住害怕地颤抖。见我没有打断他，他继续咆哮;“…但是扎德这个混蛋很擅长他的工作，很难责怪他。我一直想方设法拖累他，但直到现在我才找到。

“And how’s that got to do with me?” I snapped, feeling my eyes burn as the feeling of frustration clawed at my insides.
“那跟我有什么关系？”我厉声说，沮丧的感觉在我的内心灼热。

Tristan smirked at me, not at all bothered by my discomfort. He threw just one glance at my sore arms, tilted his head to the side and smiled; “It has got everything to do with you sugar. You see, ever since you appeared, my brother has been so taken by you that he’s done a lot of things that are usually against the will of the public and the elders. He didn’t do anything to you when you were accused of being the spy. He didn’t do shit when you were accused of bringing the rogues to the pack and being a threat to our stability… and he couldn’t even lock you up when you were accused of murder. Instead, he took you up to his room!” He snapped and I rolled my eyes.
特里斯坦对我傻笑，丝毫没有被我的不适所困扰。他只看了我一眼酸痛的手臂，把头歪向一边，微笑着;“这与你的糖有关。你看，自从你出现后，我哥哥就被你迷住了，他做了很多通常违背公众和长辈意愿的事情。当你被指控为间谍时，他没有对你做任何事情。当你被指责把流氓带到队伍里，威胁到我们的稳定时，他什么都没做......而且当你被指控谋杀时，他甚至不能把你关起来。相反，他把你带到了他的房间！他厉声说，我翻了个白眼。

“Tongues have been wagging, Hazel. There are people, voices against my brother now and there is no better time to pull him down his high horse than now.”
“舌头一直在摇晃，Hazel。现在有人，有声音反对我哥哥，没有比现在更好的时机把他拉下高马了。

Anger like no other was rooted deep inside my heart as I heard him continue to blabber about how much damage he had caused just to get me away. I was so angry that I talked back at him with just equal hate and I was just about to ask him why he hated me so much when suddenly, the cell door opened again, and this time when I saw who had stepped in, my heart literally stopped beating.
当我听到他继续喋喋不休地谈论他为了让我离开而造成了多少伤害时，我心中充满了前所未有的愤怒。我非常生气，我以同样的仇恨回击他，我正想问他为什么这么恨我，突然，牢房的门又打开了，这一次，当我看到谁走进来时，我的心真的停止了跳动。

I couldn’t believe my eyes. Tears rushed into my eyes as I regarded the man who just stepped into the room but alas, he didn’t even look at me. He simply turned to Tristan and murmured; “I’d love a moment with my daughter, Tristan.”
我简直不敢相信自己的眼睛。当我看着刚刚走进房间的男人时，泪水涌上了我的眼眶，但唉，他甚至没有看我一眼。他只是转向特里斯坦，喃喃自语;“我很想和我的女儿 Tristan 在一起。”

And as soon as I heard those words, I was immediately snapped out of my self induced reverie. I looked up at him in rage and bared my teeth;
而我一听到这句话，立刻就从自我诱导的遐想中惊醒了。我愤怒地抬头看着他，龇牙咧嘴;

“Oh, that is how it is now, father?”
“哦，爸爸，现在就是这样？“

My father didn’t respond, he still did not look at me but from here, even though I was several meters away from him, I could feel it. He was beyond enraged, and knowing him, that was the recipe for disaster, and I couldn’t help but be afraid of the big bad monster standing right in front of me.
我爸爸没有回应，他仍然没有看我，但从这里，即使我离他有几米远，我也能感觉到。他非常愤怒，了解他，这就是灾难的根源，我不禁害怕站在我面前的大坏怪物。

10、

BOOM!
繁荣！

The g*nshot was so loud and deafening, it resonated around the place. My first reaction to the sound was to duck my head and when I raised it moments later, my eyes widened as I took in the scene now unfolding in front of me. Zade was still standing to my side with an unfazed expression on his face while Father still appeared stoic, unmoving and had the deepest frown ever etched to his face. A scream tore out from the back of my throat when I saw Tristan, the brute, now sprawled on the floor with his unseeing eyes looking up at the sky. There was a steaming bu*let hole to his head and from how the skin there sizzled, I realized that the bul*et was either silver or laced with it. I gasped.
g*nshot 是如此响亮和震耳欲聘，它在这个地方引起了共鸣。我对声音的第一反应是低头，片刻后当我抬起头时，我睁大了眼睛，看着眼前展开的场景。扎德仍然站在我身边，脸上露出不为所动的表情，而父亲仍然显得坚忍，一动不动，脸上刻着有史以来最深的眉头。当我看到特里斯坦这个畜生现在躺在地板上，用他看不见的眼睛仰望天空时，我的喉咙后部发出了一声尖叫。他的头上有一个冒着热气的 bu*let 洞，从那里的皮肤嘶嘶作响的样子，我意识到那个 bul*et 要么是银色的，要么是带有它的。我倒抽了一口气。

“I always have my own plans up my sleeve, fool,” Father’s words made me turn to look at him and I was even more surprised to see that he was talking to Tristan’s lifeless body; and as if noticing that I was staring, he immediately raised his head to look at me.
“我总是有自己的计划，傻瓜，”父亲的话让我转头看向他，更让我惊讶的是，他正在对着特里斯坦毫无生气的身体说话;仿佛注意到我在盯着我看，他立即抬起头看着我。

The look in his eyes had me stumbling backward in both fear and disgust. He looked… like an animal. A savage one at that.
他的眼神让我在恐惧和厌恶中踉踉跄跄地向后退去。他看起来......就像动物一样。一个野蛮的。

The more I looked at him, the more something akin to hate bubbled up from deep within my heart. I could no longer stand to be around him. Hell, I wanted to be as far away from here as possible.
我越看他，心底深处就越涌现出一种类似于仇恨的东西。我再也无法忍受和他在一起了。妈的，我想离这里越远越好。

However, I was snapped out of my reverie when Zade pulled me behind him again and this time, I didn’t fight it. I simply stood there because truthfully I was scared of looking at Father. I was petrified of what he had become and worst of all, I had no idea what he would do to me. A few members of his soldiers had stepped to stand behind him and even though it was obvious that they were not on his side, I still knew that they would fight for him until their last breath. That was the thing with Alphas and their soldiers.
然而，当 Zade 再次将我拉到他身后时，我从我的遐想中惊醒，这一次，我没有反抗。我只是站在那里，因为说实话，我害怕看父亲。我对他所变成的样子感到震惊，最糟糕的是，我不知道他会对我做什么。他的几个士兵已经站在他身后，尽管很明显他们不站在他这边，但我仍然知道他们会为他战斗到最后一口气。这就是 Alpha 和他们的士兵的情况。

“Hazel daughter, come out now. I’ve kept to my end of the bargain, I’ve taken Tristan out of the picture, now you keep to yours!” Father snarled. It was not his words but his voice that made a shiver run through me. It sounded robotic but evil at the same time, like something straight out of a horror movie.
“黑泽尔女儿，快出来。我已经遵守了我的交易，我已经把特里斯坦从照片中拿走了，现在你遵守你的协议吧！父亲咆哮道。不是他的话，而是他的声音让我全身发抖。这听起来像机器人，但同时又很邪恶，就像直接从恐怖电影中走出来的东西。

“I... I will.” My lips shivered, but I cannot let Zade end up this way too.
“我......我会的。我的嘴唇颤抖着，但我不能让 Zade 也以这种方式结束。

At my words, I felt Zade turn to look at me but I did not look back at him. I closed my eyes as I willed all of these to come to an end. But I didn’t want to go with Father, especially after today. I loved Zade too much to do it, and now, knowing that he loves me just as much makes it a lot more difficult to go with Father and I’s initial plan.
听到我的话，我感觉到扎德转过头来看我，但我没有回头看他。我闭上眼睛，因为我希望这一切都能结束。但我不想跟爸爸一起去，尤其是在今天之后。我太爱扎德了，以至于无法做到，现在，知道他同样爱我，这使得按照父亲和我最初的计划去做变得更加困难。

“HAZEL!” Father’s voice rang out and this time, I jumped in fright. He was already marching over to us. He looked menacing and godless, something about him screamed eerie. I realized his entire demeanor might be as a result of it.
“榛子！”父亲的声音响起，这一次，我吓得跳了起来。他已经向我们走来了。他看起来气势汹汹，天哪，他身上的某个东西尖叫着怪异。我意识到他的整个举止可能是因为它的结果。

Without as much as a preamble, he grabbed my upper arm but before he could pull me away from behind Zade, Zade shoved him away so forcefully that Father stumbled backward, his eyes mad.
他没有开场白，就抓住了我的上臂，但在他把我从扎德身后拉开之前，扎德用力地把他推开了，以至于父亲向后踉跄了一下，眼神发疯了。

“Hazel! Daughter! Are you spitting our deal?” He growled. Something about his words infuriated me, I don’t know what it was but it pushed me into screaming back at Father. I yelled;
“黑泽尔！女儿！你在吐槽我们的交易吗？“他咆哮道。他的话有些激怒了我，我不知道那是什么，但它促使我对着父亲尖叫。我大喊;

“You’re not my father! You kil*ed my parents just because you wanted me!”
“你不是我爸爸！你杀了我的父母，只是因为你想要我！

Zade reeled at my words. His eyes widened momentarily before they significantly darkened. A snarl tore through his lips as he pushed Father again, this time with more force that Father fell to the floor.
扎德被我的话吓坏了。他的眼睛睁大了一会儿，然后明显变暗了。当他再次推搡父亲时，他的嘴唇发出一声咆哮，这一次他用了更大的力气，父亲倒在了地板上。

“So you m*rdered her parents just because you wanted to use her just like you used my sister?!”
“所以你就因为你想利用她，就像你利用我姐姐一样，就伤害了她的父母？！”

“It’s none of your business, BOY!”
“这不关你的事，孩子！”

“It’s all my business!” Zade growled back. “Nadine was my sister. MY SISTER! and Hazel here, is my MATE!”
“这都是我的事！”“扎德咆哮着回应。“娜丁是我的妹妹。我的姐姐！而 Hazel 在这里，是我的伴侣！

The change in Zade’s demeanor made some of Father’s soldiers scramble forward and while the ones who tried to fight Zade because of Father were attacked by Zade’s soldiers, the rest, the more logical ones either stood back or ran off. Even I was scared of Zade. I have never seen him like this before and to think that he is like this because he wants to protect me from this beast made a special kind of warmth spread across my chest.
扎德举止的变化让一些父亲的士兵争先恐后地向前冲，而那些因为父亲而试图与扎德战斗的人被扎德的士兵袭击，而其余的，更合乎逻辑的人要么退缩，要么逃跑。就连我自己也害怕扎德。我以前从未见过他这样，想到他之所以这样，是因为他想保护我免受这只野兽的伤害，我的胸口就产生了一种特殊的温暖。

I halted in my tracks when the unmistakable sound of snarls rang through the air. I found it was father, shifting. Zade nudged me to step back, and he shifted too. Both men protracted their claws and before I knew it, their bones were making snapping noises as they both shifted into their wolves.
我停下了脚步，这时空气中响起了明显的咆哮声。 我发现是爸爸在移动。Zade推我后退，他也动了动。两个人都伸出了爪子，在我意识到之前，他们的骨头在他们都变成了自己的狼时发出啪啪声。

The two wolves, Father’s own being brown and Zade’s being black, stood intimidatingly as they stared each other down. They were massive with Zade’s wolf being only a little bigger than Father’s. They looked like two savage beasts and a tremor ran through me as I immediately understood what was about to happen. They were challenging and glaring at each other.
那两只狼，爸爸的狼是棕色的，而扎德是黑色的，它们面面相觑地站着。它们很大，而扎德的狼只比父亲的狼大一点点。他们看起来像两头野兽，当我立即明白将要发生的事情时，我全身一阵颤抖。他们互相挑衅和瞪着对方。

I stepped back then, knowing fully that involving myself with their feud was like asking for a de*th wish. I contemplated shifting too but upon realization that I had a baby growing inside of me, and I had no idea what the implication of shifting while pregnant was, I decided against it.
那时我退后一步，完全知道将自己卷入他们的世仇就像要求一个愿望。我也考虑过换班，但当意识到我体内有一个孩子在成长，而我不知道怀孕期间换班意味着什么时，我决定不这样做。

Father’s soldiers had fallen at this point and the remaining ones standing were either surrendered or bound by Zade’s. The entire place was chaotic and it was majorly because of the fight between Father and Zade. They were literally tearing each other apart and from how blo*dy the ground was quickly becoming, I was certain that they both had fatal injuries underneath their matted furs.
此时父亲的士兵已经倒下，剩下的人要么投降了，要么被扎德的士兵捆绑了。整个地方很混乱，主要是因为父亲和扎德之间的争吵。他们真的在互相撕裂，从地面很快就变得如此肿胀来看，我敢肯定他们俩的毛皮下都受了致命伤。

The snarls and growls didn’t end for a long time and neither did the fatal blows stop reigning. I couldn’t look anymore and my heart hurt to think that Zade was in this because of me, the same me who would’ve easily rejected him only a few minutes ago.
咆哮和咆哮并没有持续很长时间，致命的打击也没有停止统治。我再也看不下去了，想到扎德因为我而陷入困境，我的心就痛了，就是几分钟前还轻易拒绝他的那个我。

The fight lasted for a while, but despite being unable to look, I followed by the sounds they made and by the way the ground shook under their massive weights; and just when I was beginning to think that it was soon to be over, Father shifted back to his human form, naked and wounded beyond reason. Zade soon followed suit and while I had feared that he would be covered in numerous gashes like father, I was surprised to see that he was wounded but only in a few areas like his ribs and his thigh. He was also stark naked but right now, he was too blinded by rage to care about his naked state.
战斗持续了一段时间，但尽管我无法看，我还是被他们发出的声音和大地在他们巨大的重量下震动的方式所吸引;就在我开始认为这一切很快就会结束的时候，父亲变回了他的人形，赤身裸体，受伤得无法理智。扎德很快就效仿了，虽然我担心他会像爸爸一样被许多伤口覆盖，但我惊讶地看到他受了伤，但只是在肋骨和大腿等少数几个地方受伤。他也是赤身裸体的，但现在，他被愤怒蒙蔽了双眼，无暇顾及自己的赤身裸体。

Without blinking or stopping even for a second, he marched over to father, picked up a stake and raised it in the air, but before he could plunge it into Father’s chest, the old man raised his hand and yelled;
他一眨眼也不停，大步走向父亲，拿起一根木桩举到空中，但还没来得及父亲的胸膛，老人就举起手大喊大叫;

“You wouldn’t ki*l me in front of my daughter now, would you?”
“你现在不会在我女儿面前杀我吧？”

“She isn’t your daughter!” Zade growled back but as if that wasn’t enough, he added; “Now this is for my sister, Nadine… and Hazel’s parents. Go to hell, monster!” And with that, he drove the stake into Father’s chest.
“她不是你的女儿！”Zade咆哮着回应，但似乎这还不够，他补充道;“现在这是给我姐姐的，娜丁......和 Hazel 的父母。下地狱吧，怪物！“说完，他把木桩了爸爸的胸口。

I didn’t know why or what pushed me but as soon as Zade did that, an agonized scream tore out from the back of my throat. Tears streamed down my face and I fell to the floor as tremors surged through me. There was this heaviness, this ache that immediately settled deep within my heart and to the pit of my stomach, and I focused only on that hurt as I sobbed uncontrollably into my hands.
我不知道为什么或是什么推动了我，但当 Zade 这样做时，一声痛苦的尖叫从我的喉咙后部传出。泪水从我的脸上流下来，我倒在了地板上，颤抖在我身上涌动。这种沉重，这种痛苦立即沉淀在我的心深处，直达我的胃深处，我只专注于那种痛苦，我无法控制地在我的手里啜泣。

I don’t know for how long I was there but suddenly, I felt a presence hover above me. I didn't need to check to know that it was Zade and when he pulled me carefully to my feet and then wrapped his arms around me, I momentarily forgot all about the loss, the pain.
我不知道我在那里呆了多久，但突然间，我感觉到一个存在在我上方盘旋。我不需要检查就知道是 Zade，当他小心翼翼地把我拉起来，然后用双臂搂住我时，我暂时忘记了所有的损失和痛苦。

Now, all I cared about was only him. He was all I could see, all I could feel and I basked in his warmth until I totally forgot about Father and his nearby c*rpse.
现在，我只关心他。他就是我所能看到的一切，我能感受到的一切，我沐浴在他的温暖中，直到我完全忘记了父亲和他附近的 c*rpse。