Work Text: 作品正文：
"Take my tie off."
"“把我的领带解开。”"
Nathan started; his eyes flickered to Richard for a moment before he looked straight ahead, staring at the blank lot ahead of them, fingers flexing on the wheel for something to do. After a couple swallows to get his tongue to stop sticking to the roof of his mouth, Nathan mustered, "What?"
内森愣了一下；他的目光短暂地扫过理查德，随后直视前方，盯着他们面前空荡荡的停车场，手指在方向盘上无意识地摩挲着，只为找点事做。咽了几口唾沫让舌头不再黏在上颚后，内森终于挤出了一句：“什么？”
"Take my tie off."
"“把我的领带解开。”"
Nathan actually looked at Richard this time. He was looking at Nathan, his arm hanging out of the car, cigarette glowing faintly in the warm night. His pupils were as wide as they went, and his breathing might have been a little shallow, or that might have been Nathan projecting.
这次内森真的看向理查德了。对方也正望着他，手臂搭在车窗外，香烟在温暖的夜色中泛着微弱的光。他的瞳孔扩张到极致，呼吸或许有些急促——也可能只是内森自己的错觉。
Richard took a drag off his cigarette and blew it out the open window. "I'm waiting, Babe."
理查德深吸一口烟，朝敞开的车窗外吐出烟圈。“我在等着呢，宝贝。”
Nathan hesitated a moment longer, then shifted around Richard's cane enough to reach his tie. Richard's eyes were still on him, and Nathan felt warmth flow over his own neck and cheekbones. Nathan hooked fingers into the knot of Richard's tie, worked it loose, then slid the knot down the length of the tie, slid the tie out of his collar. Richard closed his eyes and tipped his head back as Nathan's fingers smoothed the collar back into place.
纳森又犹豫了片刻，才绕过理查德的手杖够到他的领带。理查德的目光仍停留在他身上，纳森感到一股热流涌上自己的脖颈与颧骨。他将手指探入理查德领带的结扣，慢慢将其松开，顺着领带滑下结扣，最后将领带从衣领间抽离。当纳森的指尖抚平翻折的衣领时，理查德闭上眼，仰起了头。
Nathan said, "Okay." 纳森说：“好。”
"Unbutton my shirt." "“解开我的衬衫纽扣。”"
A trembling had started up in Nathan's fingers, and a strange sort of fizzy sensation was spreading through his belly. "Richard, I can't just...we're in public."
内森的手指开始颤抖，一种奇特的酥麻感正从他腹部蔓延开来。'理查德，我不能就这样...我们在公共场合。'
"We're in an empty lot. And I doubt you'd be any braver in private."
"'这是片空地。而且我怀疑私下里你也不会更勇敢些。'"
Nathan wanted the grounding effect of smoothing wrinkles out of cloth, but that either meant leaning back--breaking the spell--or sliding his hands down the fabric on Richard's chest. Or his arms. Or his thighs.
内森渴望通过抚平布料褶皱来获得踏实感，但这要么意味着向后靠——打破此刻的魔力——要么就得让双手顺着理查德胸前的衣料滑下。或者他的手臂。或者他的大腿。
"Fuck," Nathan said, barely a breath, not really intended to be aloud. Richard made a noise that might have been assent and Nathan swallowed again, shifting. This position wasn't comfortable, really. His back was hurting from twisting like this, and his knees were complaining; his neck was curled oddly so as to not hit the roof of the car. And there was that weight, reminding him that he was hard and not likely to stop being so as long as Richard sat there, letting Nathan touch him and looking...like Richard.
"操，"内森低声咒骂，几乎只是气音，本没打算让人听见。理查德发出一声或许是赞同的响动，内森又咽了咽口水，不安地挪动身子。这个姿势实在不舒服——后背因扭曲的姿势隐隐作痛，膝盖也在抗议，脖子别扭地蜷曲着以免撞到车顶。而那份沉甸甸的存在感不断提醒着他：自己硬得发疼，只要理查德还坐在那儿任由他触碰，只要理查德还是那副…理查德式的模样，这种煎熬就永无休止。
Nathan managed to unbutton the first button, trembling hands or not, and even got the second. Then he rocked back into his own seat hard enough that he knocked Richard's cane and had to right it again.
内森成功解开了第一颗纽扣，尽管双手颤抖，连第二颗也解开了。接着他猛地向后一靠，重重地跌回自己的座位，以至于撞倒了理查德的手杖，不得不又把它扶正。
"I would have let you do more than that." Richard tapped some ash into the vacant lot.
"“我本可以让你做得更多。”理查德将烟灰弹进那片空地。"
"I thought you just wanted to steal something or vandalize some property or--"
"“我以为你只是想偷点东西或者破坏些财物，或者——”"
"Do something else illegal?" Nathan looked, and saw Richard raising both eyebrows at him. "We could get that far, I suppose. Though," Richard gestured at his shirt with his left hand, "this implies we aren't going to."
"“做些别的违法勾当？”内森抬眼，看见理查德正对他挑起双眉。“我们或许真能走到那一步，不过，”理查德用左手示意了一下自己的衬衫，“这暗示我们不会。”"
Nathan's gaze dipped to the V of skin he could now see, then he jerked his eyes back up to Richard's face, but that meant his mouth, and that wasn't any better. Nathan turned away and rolled his window all the way down, hoping for a bit of cool night air to clear his head. The air wasn't the shock he wanted; the night was mild and even a little muggy, too warm and wet to remind him that he should not want to fuck his best friend.
内森的视线滑落到他现在能看到的 V 形肌肤上，随后猛地将目光重新抬回理查德的脸上，但这意味着他的嘴唇，而那也好不到哪去。内森转过身，把车窗完全摇下，希望能有点凉爽的夜风清醒头脑。空气并未带来他想要的刺激；夜晚温和甚至有点闷热，过于温暖潮湿，无法提醒他不该想和最好的朋友上床。
"Touch me." "碰我。"
It was the tone that was getting to Nathan. The words he could handle. Orders were...something, something he had no particular intention of mentioning to anyone, whether Nathan was the one giving them or the one hearing them. But he could handle that, knew how to handle that.
真正让内森受不了的是那种语气。言语本身他还能应付。命令嘛……也就那样，无论是他下达还是接收，都没什么特别值得向人提起的。但他能应付这个，也清楚该怎么应付。
Richard wasn't ordering him, not quite. Or at least, not the way Richard would order around an incompetent server, or someone he was trying to embarrass and fool to get himself somewhere he wasn't supposed to be. He was talking like this was an order, but only as far as Nathan took it as one. No harm to walking away. Just that Nathan would miss...whatever came next.
理查德并非在命令他，至少不完全是。或者说，不像理查德对待一个无能的服务员那样，也不像他为了混进不该去的地方而故意戏弄和羞辱别人时的口吻。他的语气像是在下命令，但仅限于内森将其视为命令的程度。转身离开并无大碍。只是内森会错过……接下来可能发生的一切。
"I won't ask again, Babe," and it was a promise.
"我不会再问了，宝贝，"这是一个承诺。
Nathan licked his lips. He leaned over, about to put his hand on a shoulder, something similarly innocuous, but, "I would have let you do more than that."
内森舔了舔嘴唇。他倾身向前，正要将手搭上对方的肩膀，或是其他同样无害的动作，但——“我本可以让你做得更多。”
He paused for the space of a breath, then slid fingertips along the dip on top of Richard's collarbone. Richard's breathing was deep, so far from Nathan's shallow breaths that Richard had to be stopping himself from breathing too quickly.
他停顿了呼吸的间隙，随后指尖沿着理查德锁骨上方的凹陷处滑过。理查德的呼吸深沉，与内森急促的浅呼吸截然不同，显然是在竭力克制自己不要呼吸过快。
Nathan put his mouth on Richard's. It could have been rough, and he would have loved every second, every moment, every bruised ache in the morning, but Richard wasn't going to make it that easy on him. Nathan felt the smile spread under his lips, and then Richard kissed back, gentle and warm. Richard opened his mouth, just enough to let his tongue touch Nathan's lips. Nathan made a noise he couldn't help.
内森将唇覆上理查德的。这本可以粗暴激烈，他也会沉醉于每一秒、每一刻，乃至次日清晨每一处淤青的隐痛——但理查德偏不让他轻易如愿。内森感受到笑意在彼此唇间漾开，随后理查德回吻过来，温柔而炽热。他微微启唇，舌尖轻触内森的唇瓣。内森喉间溢出一声难以自抑的喘息。
"Let me," Richard breathed into Nathan's mouth, and again with that tone. Nathan rested his weight on his arms, leaning into Richard, and opened his mouth, and oh, this was what he wanted, their tongues sliding together and their breaths mingling; he could have stayed frozen in that moment until Judgment Day and had no complaints. And then Richard hooked his hands behind Nathan's neck and Nathan shuddered, caught between not wanting to let this go and wanting to drive to Richard's place, to his, to a cheap motel, to anywhere with a bed, please--
"让我来，"理查德的气息轻拂过内森的唇，又是那种语调。内森将全身重量压在手臂上，倾身贴近理查德，张开了嘴——啊，这正是他渴望的，他们的舌纠缠在一起，呼吸交融；他甘愿永远凝固在这一刻直到末日审判，毫无怨言。接着理查德双手扣住内森的后颈，内森浑身战栗，在不愿结束与渴望驱车前往理查德的住处、自己的家、廉价汽车旅馆——任何有张床的地方之间撕扯着，求你了——
"Ow!" Nathan jerked back and saw Richard smirking, registered that the pain he'd felt flashing down his upper back was hot ash from the cigarette. "Fuck you!"
"嗷！"内森猛地往后一缩，看见理查德正咧嘴坏笑，这才意识到刚才上背部火辣辣的刺痛感是烟头烫的。"操你大爷！"
"Fuck you back," Richard said, in a tone that was a wonderful cross between his prior not-order tone and his standard mocking tone. "You liked it."
“去你的，”理查德说道，语气介于他之前那种非命令式的口吻和惯常的嘲讽之间，奇妙地融合了二者。“你明明乐在其中。”
The phrase, "I did not," was out of Nathan's mouth before the childishness caught up with him.
"我没有，"这句话脱口而出后，内森才意识到自己的幼稚。
"You did," Richard repeated. "And besides, nice little sensation to bring you back to yourself."
"你确实做到了，"理查德重复道。"而且，这种小小的刺激感正好能让你回过神来。"
With the words, Nathan fell out of the moment and back into his own seat. Richard was his best friend. Richard was only his best friend. And yes, maybe he was the only one Nathan could consistently hold an interesting conversation with, and maybe they spent a lot of time together, and maybe he looked good enough to eat even when there wasn't moonlight hitting him just right, but that didn't mean that. That.
话音刚落，内森便从恍惚中抽离，重新坐回自己的位置。理查德是他最好的朋友。理查德仅仅是他最好的朋友。没错，或许他是唯一一个能持续与内森进行有趣对话的人，或许他们共度了许多时光，又或许即使没有恰到好处的月光映照，他的模样也令人垂涎——但这并不意味着那种感情。绝不是。
"Shit. Shit shit shit."
"该死。该死该死该死。"
"Is this going to take you long?"
"“这会花你很长时间吗？”"
"We can't--we shouldn't--it's not--it's not safe and it's not right--"
"“我们不能——我们不该——这不——这不安全也不对——”"
"Nathan." That was one of Richard's standard tones, and even if it was his teaching-an-incompetent-teacher voice, it was still normal. Nathan felt a little more himself for it. "When have normal rules ever applied to us?"
"“内森。”那是理查德惯用的语气之一，即便此刻用的是他教导无能教师时的腔调，也还算正常。内森因此感觉找回了些许自我。“常规规则什么时候对我们适用过？”"
"This is--this isn't smashing bottles, or taking a few things, or--or..." Nathan didn't know what to say next.
"这可不是——不是砸几个瓶子，或者顺手牵羊几件东西，或者——或者……"内森不知道该接着说什么了。
"Or burning down a building?"
“还是放火烧楼？”
"Richard, it was once, and I am not going to do it again."
"理查德，那只是一次，我不会再那么做了。"
"I'd let you fuck me if you did."
"你要是这么做了，我就让你上我。"
Nathan felt like the world had tilted sideways, like half of him was still kissing Richard, like he was drunk. "What?"
内森感觉世界仿佛倾斜了，他的一半仍在亲吻理查德，如同醉酒般恍惚。"什么？"
Richard enunciated each word as if giving a book title over a bad phone connection: "I'd Let You Fuck Me If You Did."
理查德一字一顿地说道，仿佛在糟糕的电话信号中报出一本书名："如果你愿意，我会让你上我。"
Nathan stared at Richard, who looked back, wholly serious. Nathan fell back in his seat, shaking worse than any time since the first time someone had gotten him to come--it was different with another person. It could be different with Richard. It would be. Shit. "No, we. We can't. Shouldn't. Shouldn't do. Any of that."
内森盯着理查德，后者也回望着他，神情无比严肃。内森跌坐回椅子上，颤抖得比第一次被人说服尝试时还要厉害——和别人一起的感觉截然不同。和理查德在一起可能会不一样。一定会不一样的。该死。"不，我们。我们不能。不该。不该做。任何那种事。"
"Any of what." Richard leaned over. Not as far as Nathan had, his knees would've screamed at him, but close enough to whisper, "This, Babe?" right in his ear and then bite. Nathan made a helpless sound; he was so hard it hurt and far beyond the point where he could make rational judgments.
"随便哪样。"理查德倾身向前。他没有内森靠得那么近——他的膝盖会抗议的——但足够近到能在他耳边低语，"这个吗，宝贝？"然后咬了一口。内森发出一声无助的呻吟；他硬得发疼，早已丧失了理性判断的能力。
"Please," Nathan said, "please."
"求你了，"内森说道，"求你了。"
"Please what, Babe?" Warm wetness on his ear, rapidly cooling between Richard's breaths.
"“求什么，宝贝？”他耳畔传来温热湿润的触感，在理查德的呼吸间迅速冷却。"
"Don't call me that; I can't think when you call me that," and then Nathan realized what he'd just admitted and put his hands over his face. "God. Damn. It."
"“别那么叫我；你一那么叫我，我就没法思考了。”接着内森意识到自己刚刚承认了什么，双手捂住了脸。“天。杀。的。”"
"I like it when you can't think," Richard said. "You make such interesting sounds." Richard leaned away and Nathan relaxed a shade, still trembling from arousal and fear and something that felt like a bizarre blend of the two that he never wanted to stop.
"我喜欢你无法思考的样子，"理查德说。"你发出的声音真有趣。"理查德稍稍退开，内森略微放松了些，却仍因情欲、恐惧以及一种他永远不愿停止的、两者交织的奇异感受而颤抖不已。
And then Richard's hand was on him, sliding up and down the inside of his thigh, and Nathan's hips jumped as his knees jerked apart. He put his right hand on Richard's arm, the left on the door handle, just for something to hold on to. "Richard, Richard, fuck, I am not going to come in my--" Richard got very close to Nathan's crotch, but didn't touch. "--car."
接着，理查德的手抚上了他，沿着他大腿内侧上下滑动，内森的膝盖猛地分开，臀部随之弹起。他右手搭在理查德的手臂上，左手抓住门把手，只为找个东西稳住自己。"理查德，理查德，操，我可不想在车——"理查德贴近内森的胯部，却未真正触碰。"——里射出来。"
"No. You're going to come in your pants."
"不。你会直接尿在裤子里。"
"Fuck." Nathan could stop it if he wanted, could ask, or could turn, deny Richard the angle, could move, and should.
"“操。”内森本可以阻止这一切，只要他愿意——他可以开口询问，可以转身避开理查德的角度，可以挪动身体，他应该这么做的。"
After a second or two more, the decision was made for him: Richard stopped. Nathan let out a little cry at the loss of contact, and when he looked to Richard, ready to beg, Richard was grinning with all his teeth. "Richard, please."
又过了一两秒，这个决定已不由他掌控：理查德停下了动作。失去接触的瞬间内森发出一声小小的呜咽，当他抬头望向理查德准备哀求时，对方正咧开嘴露出满口牙齿笑着。“理查德，求你了。”
"What's in it for me?"
"我能得到什么好处？"
"Nice sounds?" Nathan said hopefully.
"声音不错吧？"内森满怀希望地说。
"I like the strain in your voice more."
"我更喜欢你声音里的那份紧绷。"
Nathan let his head fall back. Whatever odd rules were currently governing his modesty, he wasn't going to touch himself in front of Richard. "You wanted me to do something."
内森仰起头。无论此刻支配着他羞耻心的古怪规则是什么，他都不会在理查德面前碰自己。"你想让我做点什么。"
"True. I could probably find someone else, though," Richard said, sounding like he was trying to sound bored but not even bothering to make the act convincing.
"确实。不过我大概还能找到别人，"理查德说道，语气听起来像是试图显得无聊，却连装都懒得装得可信。
"What would you want me to do?"
"你想让我做什么？"
"Same as always. You're a good lookout, Babe."
"一如既往。你是个好哨兵，宝贝。"
The compliment send a thrill of pleasure through Nathan, and he couldn't even pretend it was just sex this time. He swore, "Fuck me."
这句赞美让内森心头涌起一阵愉悦，这次他甚至无法假装这只是肉体关系。他咒骂着，‘操我。’
"After." "‘之后。’"
"Fuck." "操。"
"We have a deal?"
"成交？"
Nathan wasn't going to finish coming down from this for a bit, but he already wasn't fully hard, and he didn't intend to let Richard walk away thinking he was dull. He sat up, attempting to look like his muscles weren't still loose and tight in odd places. "What happens if I say no?"
内森一时半会儿还缓不过劲来，但他已经不那么硬了，而且他可不想让理查德以为他索然无味地走开。他坐起身，努力装作肌肉没有仍在奇怪的地方时松时紧的样子。"如果我拒绝会怎样？"
Richard smiled, less tiger and more cat with the canary. "Then I won't lay a hand on you. You can forget this ever happened, if you like."
理查德笑了，少了几分虎的威猛，多了几分猫偷到金丝雀的狡黠。"那我绝不会碰你一根手指。如果你愿意，大可以把今晚的事当作从未发生。"
"Oh, fuck you." "哦，去你的。"
"I haven't heard a yes."
"我还没听到一个肯定的答复。"
"Yes, goddamnit, yes." Nathan stuck his hand out on reflex, assuming they'd seal this like the other ones, and for a moment it looked like Richard was just going to clasp his forearm instead of his hand, and then he had Nathan's tie, was pulling Nathan forward, had Nathan's mouth, half-open under his. Richard kissed him harder this time, teeth on Nathan's lips and tongue, nails on the back of his neck. By the time Richard let go, Nathan was panting.
"对，该死的，对。"内森条件反射般伸出手，以为他们会像之前那样握手成交，但有一瞬间理查德似乎只想抓住他的前臂而非手掌——接着他拽住了内森的领带，将他猛地拉近，在对方半张的唇覆上自己的。这次理查德吻得更凶，牙齿碾过内森的唇舌，指甲陷入他后颈的皮肤。当理查德终于松开时，内森已经气喘吁吁。
"Drive," Richard said. Nathan blinked, then turned the key in the ignition. His eyes kept darting over to Richard. Between the hair, the shirt, and the cigarette, he looked...well-fucked. Nathan wondered what he'd actually look like, after.
"开车，"理查德说。内森眨了眨眼，转动钥匙发动引擎。他的目光不断瞟向理查德。那凌乱的头发、皱巴巴的衬衫，还有叼着的香烟，让他看起来......活像刚被人干过。内森不禁想象，事后他究竟会是什么模样。
Richard cupped Nathan's face before he got out of the car, leaned in a little, tracing a thumb along his jawline. "Don't be late." He let go and swung out of the car, whistling a cheery little tune on the way up to his door.
理查德在下车前捧住内森的脸，微微倾身，拇指沿着他的下颌线轻抚而过。"别迟到。"他松开手，转身下车，一路吹着欢快的小调走向家门。
Nathan allowed himself a few moments to lean against the steering wheel, memorizing the evening and then calming his breath. When he had enough focus to drive without looking drunk, he started the car back up and headed home.
内森让自己靠在方向盘上稍作休息，铭记这个夜晚，然后平复呼吸。当他集中了足够的注意力，确保开车时不会显得醉态毕露后，便重新发动车子，驶向家的方向。